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What do you consider to be classified as "cheating"?

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Active Ink Slinger
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How far is too far when it comes to your partner? When does something become cheating?
Lurker
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I consider it cheating when physical contact is involved. I dont consider talkng cheating although it is a dangerous line to walk.i also dont consider sending nudes to be cheating but i personally think its unnacceptable. However, as soon as things get physical. Kissing, making out,, rubbing each other, etc. That is definitely cheating in mybook.
Rookie Scribe
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Provided their is no mutual agreement between partners and If you are in committed relationship everything about you belongs to the other. Even sneaking and masturbating and watching porn if the other is un-aware is cheating, why are you excluding them? their must be a reason.
Advanced Wordsmith
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If you're keeping any kind of extra-curricular relationship secret from your partner because you "think its going to upset them", I think that it would meet the definition.
Active Ink Slinger
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It's only cheating if you do something WITHOUT the knowledge and approval of your significant other.
"When its too kinky for everybody else, its just gettin' good for me."
(Kinky Freedman)
Lurker
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I think it's cheating when she uses the internet to make a word with all of her tiles.
Advanced Wordsmith
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It starts with the kissing. It would be cheating for me.
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Big-haired Bitch
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Cheating is different for each relationship. Anything that betrays the trust or the boundaries within that relationship is cheating, be it emotional or physical.

And I would say that any involvement with someone else that you intentionally keep from your significant other is also considered cheating. Basically any involvement with someone else without your partner's knowledge or consent is considered cheating in my book.

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Cheeky Chick
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I think it's pretty obvious what cheating is.

If you even think it might hurt the person you're with if they found out you've done something, it's cheating. If you're doing something with someone else you'd only do with your special someone, it's cheating.

You can cheat in person.
You can cheat online.
You can cheat with words.
You can cheat with touch.
You can cheat with photos.

It's pretty clear what cheating is. If you find the need to cheat, break up with that person. Don't be a selfish arse.
Raised on Blackroot
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Emotional cheating can be just as bad, even worse, than the actual physical act of cheating.

It'd certainly be more painful to be cheated on emotionally in some cases, than physically.

As in, being in a committed relationship with someone, being deeply in love with your partner and that same partner first becoming BFFs then falling in love, then fucking, all the while keeping it a secret.

Pretty much what Poppet said.

Once you start to lie and keep secrets from your SO about another person...that's cheating in all its myriad forms.
Lurker
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Quote by MadMartigan
Emotional cheating can be just as bad, even worse, than the actual physical act of cheating.

It'd certainly be more painful to be cheated on emotionally in some cases, than physically.

As in, being in a committed relationship with someone, being deeply in love with your partner and that same partner first becoming BFFs then falling in love, then fucking, all the while keeping it a secret.

Pretty much what Poppet said.

Once you start to lie and keep secrets from your SO about another person...that's cheating in all its myriad forms.


Having been emotionally cheated on in a past relationship, I can say it was very painful. I would have preferred that she had just slept with someone. It would have hurt but that hurt a lot. It ended our relationship and she still didn't understand why it hurt so much. We are just friends, nothing has happened but it did, emotionally. When you sneak behind someone's back to go to dinner, to a club, to the park and the partner has made it clear that they don't want you seeing that other person anymore, then you are cheating.

Cheating is whatever the couple decides it is. People have all sorts of relationships and all sorts of understandings. I know couples with open relationships and it works for them. I knew a girl who was in a plural relationship with two men and they lived together. So? It is up to the people to draw the line in the sand.
I don't need to know every time my husband watches some porn and jacks off and he doesn't care when I pleasure myself alone. He may get turned on hearing about it but we are separate individuals. How could that be cheating? You don't own the other person's sexual appetite or genitals.
Lurker
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Lots of great answers here. I agree with so many of you! As for me, I consider 'cheating' anything you say or do that you would want to conceal from the other person. Whether it's a relationship, a sexual encounter, or even communication. Anything that places you closer or in confidence with someone else is cheating in my book.

The Creep
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Quote by Poppet
I think it's pretty obvious what cheating is.

If you even think it might hurt the person you're with if they found out you've done something, it's cheating. If you're doing something with someone else you'd only do with your special someone, it's cheating.

You can cheat in person.
You can cheat online.
You can cheat with words.
You can cheat with touch.
You can cheat with photos.

It's pretty clear what cheating is. If you find the need to cheat, break up with that person. Don't be a selfish arse.


i totally agrees with you and also... yes you can cheat by just thinking with other partner
Lurker
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Yes, there can be emotional/physical cheating and that's a bad thing

However, if your partner

A) Grants you permission to be with another person
and
B) Is given the same opportunities

Then it's not cheating, it's just having a little fun outside the relationship

My $.02 anyway - and yes, my live-in partner and I do allow each other certain leniency
Rookie Scribe
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Although "cheating" can be defined differently for everyone, "cheating" to me is ANY betrayal of trust in a relationship. If you are hiding it or sneaking to do it, you probably shouldn't be doing it in the first place. If you think to yourself "If my wife / girlfriend / husband / boyfriend / SO catches me they will be pissed", then you probably know what cheating is...
Active Ink Slinger
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This is easy, cheating is when you get caught!!!
Active Ink Slinger
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I think it is lying. I can accept (to a degree) if my significant other touches another girl, and maybe accepts a bj or hj or more from her. Men are men, and I know that a lot of them have no willpower when it comes to a determined, young girl wanting to play around. That may be a transgression that needs to be talked about, and rectified, but sometimes it isn't really cheating.

But lie about it to me? THAT is cheating. And lying, and doing it again and lying again? THAT is gameover cheating. I won't put up with that.

Active Ink Slinger
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Emotional cheating by far is the worst thing your bf/husband can do.

Active Ink Slinger
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Anything beyond a casual kiss would be cheating to me.

Active Ink Slinger
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Cheating is a tag only when someone else finds out about it.

Let's be honest, if we (either gender) takes the other for granted and on repeated attempts, dont mend our ways, it's a bit more chaotic.

And also, leaving a marriage is not that simple. Most of the ppl are not geared to handle the taunts, the disapprovals from family and friends.

Everything is best kept secret. Not everyone can handle the truth.

Rookie Scribe
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It's all about your agreement with your partner.
If you're in a committed, monogamous relationship, then it's all about the two of you. Your thoughts are powerful things, and usually (though not always) lead to action.

It's natural to be attracted to others, especially in a very long-term relationship. Humans get bored, and our relationships are complicated. Besides, in our society, everything is so sexually charged.

But if you've agreed to be faithful to one another, then it's vital that you remain truthful and dedicated to one another. Does that cover watching porn or going on online forums? I think if you keep secrets from your partner, it could be considered cheating. When I'm in monogamous relationships, I feel the tacit agreement is to protect each others' health, integrity, and feelings in all that you do.

Now, if you have a relationship where you can openly discuss sticky issues like feeling attracted to someone else, or needing something that your partner is not providing or is unable to provide for you, that's healthy.

I've been in committed relationships where one or both of us had an attraction to or feelings for someone else, and we discussed it openly. Sometimes it was too painful, sometimes it was something we could work through, and occasionally, it allowed us to open the relationship and have someone join us in bed, which was great fun.

The main thing, I think in monogamous or open relationships is honesty.

If you're poly but have established rules (i.e., safe sex, getting tested before taking on a new partner, drug use, the level of emotional involvement with secondary partners), then those have to be honoured. I have poly friends who have ended relationships because of breaches of trust. Without trust, respect, and honesty, what do you have?

I may be biased. I've been burned hard, to the point where I had to leave the country I'd emigrated to and start my life over from scratch, all because my partner lied, cheated, and decided they couldn't face the reality and consequences of the situation.

I just wish people would be more honest with themselves and the people they have relationships with. I think everyone would be happier with more honest relationships instead of trying to stay faithful when they are unwilling or incapable of doing so.

And that's my two cents.

Rookie Scribe
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Quote by Dani
Cheating is different for each relationship. Anything that betrays the trust or the boundaries within that relationship is cheating, be it emotional or physical.

And I would say that any involvement with someone else that you intentionally keep from your significant other is also considered cheating. Basically any involvement with someone else without your partner's knowledge or consent is considered cheating in my book.

Ah, you were so much more concise than I!
Yes. That's it.