I've gone 'round and 'round with this feature and from my experience it's just completely broken. At this point, I would just like the mods to remove *ALL* of the attempts I've made from *ALL* of my stories. And maybe just let me know when you think this is actually working and I might try again.
I've tried to set this up on a couple of my story series and now everything is messed up. Half the time I try to edit a story *just* to correct the series name it sends the story into the edit queue for a moderator. Now half of my stories have the wrong series name and I'm afraid to try and fix it for fear of pissing the moderators off further.
What a cluster fuck.
I agree with the communication point. No relationship (and certainly no BDSM relationship) is like another.
Personally, I don't like bratting (that is, faux misbehavior in order to induce a punishment). I would rather she request attention directly if she wishes it, or perhaps arrange for a regular scheduled session.
But by contrast lots of couples like the bratting dynamic. As long as both sides know and approve, it's all good.