I got the mole

It's easy to recognize a mole personality. They have pasty complexions and are usually seen in late night coffee shops, jazz bars or underground clubs. To avoid drawing attention to themselves, they favor dark clothing and sunglasses and are the first people to volunteer for the graveyard shift.

Physically, moles are not awe-inspiring individuals. Their pale skin and plump physique are usually accompanied by thick glasses or contacts that compensate for poor eyesight. However, they are comfortable with their flaccid bodies and seek companionship with others who appreciate their more philosophical qualities. Shunning contemporary fashions, moles prefer dark clothes and retro-styles.

There's something compelling about the mole personality, and in the early sixties it was quite fashionable to be a mole in the form of a creative and philosophical beatnik expressing angst through music and poetry. Bob Dylan and John Lennon carried the mole standard into the seventies, but the fashion largely died and moles were forced back underground.

Passive and unassertive, they prefer to retreat at the first sign of confrontation and would rather run than take physical action. If they were to be found on a rare trip to Disneyworld, angry tan lines would be a dead giveaway to their mole personality.

Moles are restless and, although constantly engaged in activity, they never seem to get anything done. Careers are taken seriously, though. So seriously, in fact, that with their little heads down and their backs fully into the job moles may not notice the world going by. But even moles have dreams, and long for a time when they can put down the shovel and take a well-deserved hammock break on a quiet shady beach.

Moles have extremely sharp minds and are excellent problem solvers. As reflected in their determined burrowing through difficult terrain, moles prefer solutions with straight lines rather than having to go around problems. When confronted with difficult issues they never give up; hacking away with dogged determination until the answer is found. This attribute makes them perfect for jobs in engineering, accounting or diagnostic work. With their unique underground perspective on life, moles have enormous potential as songwriters, poets, or left-wing journalists, and some of the world's finest philosophical writing has emanated from moles.

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