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The Untimely Death Of Viagra Victor (Aged 92)

A very silly ditty inspired by the superior work of Lush's Daisy Shylass!
Put down the kettle, Ethel, the blue pill is kicking in,
Throw on your sexy bloomers and pour us both a gin.
I feel a stirring in my slacks as wrinkled flesh engorges,
The diamond doll is working, and you my dear are gorgeous...

Take out your curlers, Ethel, and struggle into bed,
Take out your teeth as well old girl, we'll try a little head.
To start, lean on your zimmer frame, I'll take you from behind.
You know you love it, dirty bitch, so don't pretend you mind.

Do us a favour, raver, help me with me zipper,
For I haven't had a hard on since Prince Andrew was a nipper.
I'd free the beast myself but this arthritis is a curse,
Now, look at THAT you lttle minx, I bet that you've had worse...

Oooh, 'eck, Ethel, I've a pain under me vest,
(Ethel places a hearing-aided ear against his chest...)
At first she hears a drum solo that sounds like Ginger Baker,
And then a deathly silence... Victor's gone to meet his maker.

The moral of this story, if you are old and horny, well
Consider it a cautionary tale, a kind of warning...
For Ethel spends her evenings now cavorting about town
Watched by the ghost of a frustrated Victor Brown.

(This story was read, as a favour and quite brilliantly, by the Author's friend, the talented Lush Writer Shylass. Her stuff is better!)
This story is protected by International Copyright Law, by the author, all rights reserved. If found posted anywhere other than Lushstories.com with this note attached, it has been posted without my permission.

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