Wife and I have been together for 13 years. Our sex life is not bad but, I feel it could be better and more stimulating. Basically it is good but rarely "hot" and after being with her for so long, I'm still interested in it being hot with her. She has always been the more reserved one between the two of us when it comes to sex. She is not someone that doesn't like sex, I just feel that she rarely opens up and lets go of her inhibitions even though we've been together so long. I've expressed to her that there is nothing she could do or want that will turn me off from her or make me judge her. I understand that the way to a great sex life with a woman is through her mind and not her vagina. How do I tap into the mind so that when I tap into the vagina, I know she is totally in? If I'm wrong about my perception of her being all in, what are the signs to show it?

