When I joined Lush I didn't socialize much and most of my friends were men I cybered with. After some time, with all the chatting and the forums and so on, I started to spend more time here and have friends I talk to about anything... but the truth is, now that I think about it, that all my friends are men. With most of them I cyber (or have done it at some point), with others I don't (and that's completely fine). But none of my friends are women.
I believe that my friends are friends mainly with women (with the exception of the ones that are bisexual and are friends with both).
I've seen lots of profiles of women that are lesbian (or bisexual, or bi-curious) and straight away say they won't accept friend requests from men.
So, I'm really curious, am I right to believe that (cybering or not) we have the tendency to be Lush friends only with the sex we feel attracted to? Or do you have a different experience?
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The Sex Of Your Lush Friends
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Quote by natasha_
When I joined Lush I didn't socialize much and most of my friends were men I cybered with. After some time, with all the chatting and the forums and so on, I started to spend more time here and have friends I talk to about anything... but the truth is, now that I think about it, that all my friends are men. With most of them I cyber (or have done it at some point), with others I don't (and that's completely fine). But none of my friends are women.
I believe that my friends are friends mainly with women (with the exception of the ones that are bisexual and are friends with both).
I've seen lots of profiles of women that are lesbian (or bisexual, or bi-curious) and straight away say they won't accept friend requests from men.
So, I'm really curious, am I right to believe that (cybering or not) we have the tendency to be Lush friends only with the sex we feel attracted to? Or do you have a different experience?
You little horn bag
I am exclusively friends with women, but not out of design. I, unlike you, didn't come on here to simply cyber (or cyber at all, actually- I really didn't see me staying here for this long)- that being said, I have certainly done it often enough since joining (and you're my friend, so I'll let others decide what that means or not...). However, I never became friends with someone to cyber with them. In all instances, I became friends with someone because we had something in common (like football, sense of humour, or a shared belief in my brilliance), and then with some of them, although not all of them, sexy times then followed
I have a lot of fun in the forums and seem to attract attention (good and bad...) that way, and it just happens that the people who have messaged me following that attention has then tended to be women. I have no desire to block or refrain from talking to men, or not becoming friends with them, it's just that it hasn't happened yet.
There have been a few guys that I've spoken with privately (messaging) about a few subjects, and I've spoken to them in the exact same manner as I have all my lady friends- it's just that it hasn't then translated into 'recognised' friendship (and definitely not cybering)
Let's be honest though, this site is a site about sex. I wouldn't call it a sex site, or a porn site, but wouldn't it stand to reason that people would be attracted to people of the opposite sex (or same sex, if gay. Or both, if Bi)? I don't think that is weird, and you can definitely understand why it would happen.
I've only been in one other forum before and it was a football one, so people were attracted to those who supported the same team- whatever the sex (although mostly boys, as it was mostly men there). So I'm betting that most people are like me- they tend to have predominately, or exclusively, friends with people who they find (or might find) attracted to, without necessarily being against befriending others?
Quote by TheAngryishLover
You little horn bag
Thank you for your feedback, darling
Quote by TheAngryishLover
There have been a few guys that I've spoken with privately (messaging) about a few subjects, and I've spoken to them in the exact same manner as I have all my lady friends- it's just that it hasn't then translated into 'recognised' friendship (and definitely not cybering)
It's been the same for me with women, but I've probably talked less with other women than you have with other guys.
Quote by TheAngryishLover
Let's be honest though, this site is a site about sex. I wouldn't call it a sex site, or a porn site, but wouldn't it stand to reason that people would be attracted to people of the opposite sex (or same sex, if gay. Or both, if Bi)? I don't think that is weird, and you can definitely understand why it would happen.
(...)
So I'm betting that most people are like me- they tend to have predominately, or exclusively, friends with people who they find (or might find) attracted to, without necessarily being against befriending others?
I think you're right. Like always, of course. (Yes, I'm obviously the one with a shared belief in his brilliance.)
I'm still curious to see what others will say.
Lady GlitterGiggles
Quote by TheAngryishLover
Really? Because I think I nailed it. Close the thread, I say- question has been answered
Really? Because I read Natasha's post and had a moment of brilliance...then I read your....response and I've no idea where I am.
Lady GlitterGiggles
Well Natasha, your post has just made me attracted to you. I joined Lush a little over a year ago. I had visited Lush before then, but like you Natasha, came and came, and left. I'd jump in a chat room, read a story, and honestly only spoke to people if the topic was sex and ended with my orgasm.
Then I joined and of course, started out the same way. My 1st friend, whom I am still friends with, I met in a chat room. (funny that it's really a picture posting room, but whatever) I have a handful of friends that I am "talk daily" friends with. I feel badly for a couple. They stick around even though they know I am completely mental. So I cherish them. Guess what? Only one is female. And I am talking about friends, the benifits part is not important. I have found that NOT having C-sex has built some great, long term friendships. Ha. Alright. Enough background. Moving on....
I have been betrayed, played, and viciously hurt by females on Lush so I tend to NOT become friends with many. It seems I lack a general female mentality. I really just come here for fun. Bitch to my friends about daily struggles of real life issues like....I don't have any fucking coffee. And listen to their struggles as well. Flirt, dance, drink, whatever....I have posted on my profile "keep me out of your drama". Seems like lots of drama, usually with women (or men posing) fighting over a man. I have friends who like that drama. They are still my friends, I choose to sit on the side lines and refuse to talk about people whom I know nothing about.
not sure any of that made actual sense......I am pretty up front with people from the get go. I have lost my shit a few times and deleted all my friends. I hope I've grown out of it. Love getting friend requests that say "you deleted me again" lol. I do love the friends I've made here!!
Then I joined and of course, started out the same way. My 1st friend, whom I am still friends with, I met in a chat room. (funny that it's really a picture posting room, but whatever) I have a handful of friends that I am "talk daily" friends with. I feel badly for a couple. They stick around even though they know I am completely mental. So I cherish them. Guess what? Only one is female. And I am talking about friends, the benifits part is not important. I have found that NOT having C-sex has built some great, long term friendships. Ha. Alright. Enough background. Moving on....
I have been betrayed, played, and viciously hurt by females on Lush so I tend to NOT become friends with many. It seems I lack a general female mentality. I really just come here for fun. Bitch to my friends about daily struggles of real life issues like....I don't have any fucking coffee. And listen to their struggles as well. Flirt, dance, drink, whatever....I have posted on my profile "keep me out of your drama". Seems like lots of drama, usually with women (or men posing) fighting over a man. I have friends who like that drama. They are still my friends, I choose to sit on the side lines and refuse to talk about people whom I know nothing about.
not sure any of that made actual sense......I am pretty up front with people from the get go. I have lost my shit a few times and deleted all my friends. I hope I've grown out of it. Love getting friend requests that say "you deleted me again" lol. I do love the friends I've made here!! 
Lady GlitterGiggles
Quote by TheAngryishLover
Haven't you got your own thread you should be posting in?
What thread? And who the fuck are we to take up her thread? I'll argue with you elsewhere!
Prolific Writer
I have both men and women friends.
My friends are not wallflowers either. I do like to talk, post pictures to walls.
I'm not into collecting friends.
xo
My friends are not wallflowers either. I do like to talk, post pictures to walls.
I'm not into collecting friends.
xo
Lady GlitterGiggles
Quote by TheAngryishLover
Your sexist one where you objectify men. We have feelings too, you know?....
Too? You know I don't have feelings. I am sorry......the thread will be lost among all the boobs soon enough....I promise
Quote by adi_me33
Well Natasha, your post has just made me attracted to you. I joined Lush a little over a year ago. I had visited Lush before then, but like you Natasha, came and came, and left. I'd jump in a chat room, read a story, and honestly only spoke to people if the topic was sex and ended with my orgasm.
Then I joined and of course, started out the same way. My 1st friend, whom I am still friends with, I met in a chat room. (funny that it's really a picture posting room, but whatever) I have a handful of friends that I am "talk daily" friends with. I feel badly for a couple. They stick around even though they know I am completely mental. So I cherish them. Guess what? Only one is female. And I am talking about friends, the benifits part is not important. I have found that NOT having C-sex has built some great, long term friendships. Ha. Alright. Enough background. Moving on....
I have been betrayed, played, and viciously hurt by females on Lush so I tend to NOT become friends with many. It seems I lack a general female mentality. I really just come here for fun. Bitch to my friends about daily struggles of real life issues like....I don't have any fucking coffee. And listen to their struggles as well. Flirt, dance, drink, whatever....I have posted on my profile "keep me out of your drama". Seems like lots of drama, usually with women (or men posing) fighting over a man. I have friends who like that drama. They are still my friends, I choose to sit on the side lines and refuse to talk about people whom I know nothing about.
Another horn bag, huh? Welcome to the club, my dear. Take a seat and a muffin.
I have never really been friends with girls on here. Well, on the early days of just cybering there was a girl that... well, we talked just twice but there she was among my friends. And there was a friend of one of my friends, that I met the day I said "yeah, ok, we can try a threesome" (not a good idea, by the way). We actually were "friends" for a short time but it got too awkward the day I told her something that should stay between us and, after agreeing to that, she said that if he asked her she would tell him because he was her master and she had to. WTF.
I haven't experienced it but totally get what you say about the drama. Sometimes people get too attached (I understand, it's happened to me at times) but instead of making an effort to think rationally and tell themselves how silly they're being... they just make a huge deal out of it and well... DRAMA.
Though, in all honesty, I've wondered if it doesn't get awkward when you have common friends... Something like, lets say, you and me are both friends and we have a common friend called Henry and, like the horn bag I apparently am, I feel like cybering with him and he tells me "Well, I'm talking with Adi now." Which is fine because we are all free and I would respect that... but wouldn't be too awkward?
Anyway, I have a great solution for this: anything you talk about with one friend, should stay between you both. Sexual or not. And there isn't really need to mention what you're doing and with whom you're doing it. "I'm busy right now" is good enough answer... unless the other girl is explaining Henry how to make scones, because in that case I want to be invited and take notes.
Rainbow Warrior
I'm attracted to both sexes, but my Lush friends seem to be predominantly men, mostly older men. The younger guys soon figure out that I'm not into cybering, and quickly wander away to find hornier girls to flirt with. And although I state on my profile that I prefer the company of girls, very few women on Lush contact me at all.
Quote by BethanyFrasier
I'm attracted to both sexes, but my Lush friends seem to be predominantly men, mostly older men. The younger guys soon figure out that I'm not into cybering, and quickly wander away to find hornier girls to flirt with. And although I state on my profile that I prefer the company of girls, very few women on Lush contact me at all.
Prolific Writer
Quote by natasha_
Just out of curiosity... what does BFSC mean?
Glad you asked....I was wondering the same thing...
Site administrator
Quote by Mysteria27
Glad you asked....I was wondering the same thing...
Basic Firearms Safety Certificate .. jeez I thought it was obvious and everyone knew that.
Oh and I dont ask my friends about their sex life .. none of my business.
Kiss My Wiggleass Baby
I originally came to Lush to read and then fell into the forums quite heavily and really enjoy spending time here. I have never cybered with anyone up to this point even though some on here don't believe that (mainly randoms), it might change in the future but it might not. For the first 2 months I literally had one friend, I didn't look to make friends and my personality gives way to the 'not wanting to bother anyone' mentality. Also with friends I would like to be able to chat sometimes and I know that's really hard with some of the time differences so it just sometimes isn't possible.
I started out with just guy friends and now have one or two girl friends but I'm open to both sexes, I chat mostly with guys though for some reason. I really don't get the 'drama' that some need on here, that just isn't for me, I haven't been really touched by it I have to say but I have had three people think I'm someone else, one of whom was really horrible in a couple of emails he sent me and one I literally said hi to on a forum and he accused me of being someone else and told me not to post under him or contact him at all, lol. I really would hate to become that untrusting and paranoid about people on a website.
I've heard there are people with multiple accounts and those who pose as someone else but, as far as I know, I've never come across them. People pour out such emotion here I can understand those who get hurt, I think we all have some kind of vulnerability and others like to play on that and that makes me disappointed but there are some on here, the friends I have and others too that seem to be decent and caring, the men and the women, so maybe I'm lucky to have waited before I made any friends or maybe I'm missing out on cybering with some guy who knows how to push my buttons, who knows.
In short, fuck me I ramble on so much, I am attracted to guys and have guy friends but I also have some girl friends, what I go for is if they have personality and make me laugh or if they have a wonderful talent that shines from them (that generally makes me wonder why the hell they would want to be my friend,lol), not if they are a good mind fuck, I would just be damned lucky if they could mind fuck me if I ever chose to.
I've finished now, give me a kick up my ass for droning on and send me on my way
*Oh my god Ive just seen the length of it, apologies
I started out with just guy friends and now have one or two girl friends but I'm open to both sexes, I chat mostly with guys though for some reason. I really don't get the 'drama' that some need on here, that just isn't for me, I haven't been really touched by it I have to say but I have had three people think I'm someone else, one of whom was really horrible in a couple of emails he sent me and one I literally said hi to on a forum and he accused me of being someone else and told me not to post under him or contact him at all, lol. I really would hate to become that untrusting and paranoid about people on a website.
I've heard there are people with multiple accounts and those who pose as someone else but, as far as I know, I've never come across them. People pour out such emotion here I can understand those who get hurt, I think we all have some kind of vulnerability and others like to play on that and that makes me disappointed but there are some on here, the friends I have and others too that seem to be decent and caring, the men and the women, so maybe I'm lucky to have waited before I made any friends or maybe I'm missing out on cybering with some guy who knows how to push my buttons, who knows.
In short, fuck me I ramble on so much, I am attracted to guys and have guy friends but I also have some girl friends, what I go for is if they have personality and make me laugh or if they have a wonderful talent that shines from them (that generally makes me wonder why the hell they would want to be my friend,lol), not if they are a good mind fuck, I would just be damned lucky if they could mind fuck me if I ever chose to.
I've finished now, give me a kick up my ass for droning on and send me on my way
*Oh my god Ive just seen the length of it, apologies
Happiness will never come to those who don’t appreciate what they already have
Quote by poppyx
I originally came to Lush to read and then fell into the forums quite heavily and really enjoy spending time here. I have never cybered with anyone up to this point even though some on here don't believe that (mainly randoms), it might change in the future but it might not. For the first 2 months I literally had one friend, I didn't look to make friends and my personality gives way to the 'not wanting to bother anyone' mentality. Also with friends I would like to be able to chat sometimes and I know that's really hard with some of the time differences so it just sometimes isn't possible.
I started out with just guy friends and now have one or two girl friends but I'm open to both sexes, I chat mostly with guys though for some reason. I really don't get the 'drama' that some need on here, that just isn't for me, I haven't been really touched by it I have to say but I have had three people think I'm someone else, one of whom was really horrible in a couple of emails he sent me and one I literally said hi to on a forum and he accused me of being someone else and told me not to post under him or contact him at all, lol. I really would hate to become that untrusting and paranoid about people on a website.
I've heard there are people with multiple accounts and those who pose as someone else but, as far as I know, I've never come across them. People pour out such emotion here I can understand those who get hurt, I think we all have some kind of vulnerability and others like to play on that and that makes me disappointed but there are some on here, the friends I have and others too that seem to be decent and caring, the men and the women, so maybe I'm lucky to have waited before I made any friends or maybe I'm missing out on cybering with some guy who knows how to push my buttons, who knows.
In short, fuck me I ramble on so much, I am attracted to guys and have guy friends but I also have some girl friends, what I go for is if they have personality and make me laugh or if they have a wonderful talent that shines from them (that generally makes me wonder why the hell they would want to be my friend,lol), not if they are a good mind fuck, I would just be damned lucky if they could mind fuck me if I ever chose to.
I've finished now, give me a kick up my ass for droning on and send me on my way
*Oh my god Ive just seen the length of it, apologies
No apologies needed, thank you for your answer. I really appreciate it.
And I get what you say. I've had a different experience, but in the end I just love that you can find here so many people from so many different places, backgrounds and ages... I find it fascinating. There are very interesting people there and I'm enjoying getting to know them. Both men and women (drama queens and kings aside). I just, for some reason, have never really had the opportunity to meet the wonderful women of Lush.
Gravelly-Voiced Fucker
Nearly all of my friends here are girls, but that is somewhat true of real life too. I don't know why, it's not for the cybering, as I have cybered with very few of them. I guess I like the way women think (and perhaps they like the way I think). Men tend to see things as black or white. Women are good at seeing the vast swaths of gray area in between.
My motivations for being here are a moving target. I had very few friends at the beginning, and pretty much just wrote and read. I then delved headfirst into cybering for a time, mostly as an escape from loss and grieving in my real life. I enjoyed that period of my Lush life, met some people who are still really good friends, and I think cybering was very healing and life affirming. Ironically, it helped pull me back into the real world.
I don't cyber anymore, and I haven't published a story since May of last year (though a new one is almost done). Now I mostly just fuck around on the Forums, and read/comment on the occasional story/poem. Yet most of my interactions in the forums and story comments are still with women. Go figure.
My motivations for being here are a moving target. I had very few friends at the beginning, and pretty much just wrote and read. I then delved headfirst into cybering for a time, mostly as an escape from loss and grieving in my real life. I enjoyed that period of my Lush life, met some people who are still really good friends, and I think cybering was very healing and life affirming. Ironically, it helped pull me back into the real world.
I don't cyber anymore, and I haven't published a story since May of last year (though a new one is almost done). Now I mostly just fuck around on the Forums, and read/comment on the occasional story/poem. Yet most of my interactions in the forums and story comments are still with women. Go figure.
Kiss My Wiggleass Baby
It must be the size of your lolly, I know I'm jealous of it!!!!!!!!
Happiness will never come to those who don’t appreciate what they already have
Just me
My opinion and only mine. I started out with all men, Then I had a couple woman(not mentioning names) send me friends request, I accepted them. Had one or maybe two conversations with them, and came back they next day and had deleted me. Not because we didn't get along, but because they found out the info the needed or seen what they wanted, to bring on drama and ruin a good friendship. So from then on, I no longer accepted woman. I have recently added a few woman to my friends list. There is one that has been on my friends list from almost the beginning of me joining lush, and I know I can trust her with any and everything. She is my dearest and closest friend on lush. (I do have a couple I talk to more than most) It seems woman just don't want to be friends with woman unless its for a reason. But with what happened to me. I will admit, I am very gun shy now. I do have a couple very close male friends I talk to and trust with anything.
Click below to see
The Linebacker
I don't cyber sex with anyone. My friend son Lush are male and female of all sexual orientations. I like people, especially interesting people and people different from me as well as people similar to me.
Southern Charmer
I came to Lush to read and write stories. The thought of cybering was scary and was NEVER going to happen. The first two people that reached out to me were men, both I am still very close with and I love them dearly. The third one was a woman. She is no longer on Lush, but we text each other at minimum once a week and I love her dearly as well.
My friend's list is pretty equally split, almost half of them are women. Now breaking it down to the people that I talk to daily or weekly is still pretty split. Six men and four women. Has cyber played a part in some of those friendships? Yes, but not all.
I have some women on Lush that I truly love for who they are and I have NEVER cybered with them. They are just amazing women that I respect completely.
Now I will admit that being a woman on Lush can be extremely hard sometimes. Not only do we battle off the unwanted attention from some men, but we are also well aware of being watched by most of the other women.
Some things that will cause you to be judged by women (and some men):
If your avatar is too sexy.
If you are too nice.
If you aren't nice enough.
If you post one time too many under one man.
If you post something random under the wrong woman.
Or the worst one of all...
If you are having too much fun in the forums.
Do I like every woman on Lush? Hell no. Does every woman on Lush like me? Hell no. And that's okay because we just avoid each other.
The thing is most women are quick to form an opinion based on what they see, men will usually base their opinions on how the woman treats them. That's why it's easier for women to have male friends.
My friend's list is pretty equally split, almost half of them are women. Now breaking it down to the people that I talk to daily or weekly is still pretty split. Six men and four women. Has cyber played a part in some of those friendships? Yes, but not all.
I have some women on Lush that I truly love for who they are and I have NEVER cybered with them. They are just amazing women that I respect completely.
Now I will admit that being a woman on Lush can be extremely hard sometimes. Not only do we battle off the unwanted attention from some men, but we are also well aware of being watched by most of the other women.
Some things that will cause you to be judged by women (and some men):
If your avatar is too sexy.
If you are too nice.
If you aren't nice enough.
If you post one time too many under one man.
If you post something random under the wrong woman.
Or the worst one of all...
If you are having too much fun in the forums.
Do I like every woman on Lush? Hell no. Does every woman on Lush like me? Hell no. And that's okay because we just avoid each other.
The thing is most women are quick to form an opinion based on what they see, men will usually base their opinions on how the woman treats them. That's why it's easier for women to have male friends.
I have a new story out! Wish You Were Here A teasing sub may I have pushed too far, but the punishment is oh so sweet.
If you haven't already, please check out my story with leftlingula. A husband and wife rediscovered each other and It all started with one simple word...
Nightshade Part 1 & Nightshade: Part 2
Quote by MadameMolly
I came to Lush to read and write stories. The thought of cybering was scary and was NEVER going to happen. The first two people that reached out to me were men, both I am still very close with and I love them dearly. The third one was a woman. She is no longer on Lush, but we text each other at minimum once a week and I love her dearly as well.
My friend's list is pretty equally split, almost half of them are women. Now breaking it down to the people that I talk to daily or weekly is still pretty split. Six men and four women. Has cyber played a part in some of those friendships? Yes, but not all.
I have some women on Lush that I truly love for who they are and I have NEVER cybered with them. They are just amazing women that I respect completely.
Now I will admit that being a woman on Lush can be extremely hard sometimes. Not only do we battle off the unwanted attention from some men, but we are also well aware of being watched by most of the other women.
Some things that will cause you to be judged by women (and some men):
If your avatar is too sexy.
If you are too nice.
If you aren't nice enough.
If you post one time too many under one man.
If you post something random under the wrong woman.
Or the worst one of all...
If you are having too much fun in the forums.
Do I like every woman on Lush? Hell no. Does every woman on Lush like me? Hell no. And that's okay because we just avoid each other.
The thing is most women are quick to form an opinion based on what they see, men will usually base their opinions on how the woman treats them. That's why it's easier for women to have male friends.
I think that, thankfully, most men are very logical and practical creatures. I love that about them. The logic and how straight forward most of them are and the fact that when they say "I'm ok" they actually mean it. (And I say most of them because some are like the typical teenage girl.) Most women tend to overthink things, and then read a lot between the lines... a lot of times wrongly.
And we can be really hard on each other. Real bitches.
It's sad, but it happens.
Thank you for your contribution. And to the people above as well.