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How to check if you have messaged someone before

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PJH
Active Ink Slinger
Not a major problem but is there a simple way please of finding out if you have messaged someone before?

I could look through all of my sent posts although some have been deleted but is there any other way please?

Putting the person's username in search does not work because I have just tried that with someone that I have recently messaged and it came up as 'no messages found' which suggests it is only the message contents that get searched.

Just curious because I do not like bothering someone who has previously 'ignored' a message from me although I often start messages with "I do not think that I have messaged you before...."

Thank you.
Paul
simplyjohn
Site administrator
Quote by PJH
Not a major problem but is there a simple way please of finding out if you have messaged someone before?

I could look through all of my sent posts although some have been deleted but is there any other way please?

Putting the person's username in search does not work because I have just tried that with someone that I have recently messaged and it came up as 'no messages found' which suggests it is only the message contents that get searched.

Just curious because I do not like bothering someone who has previously 'ignored' a message from me although I often start messages with "I do not think that I have messaged you before...."

Thank you.
Paul


Well I have different results. In the search field if I enter a members name I get all the messages received from them and those sent. If I enter a valid members name, and neither of the aforementioned applies, then I get no results. For me, since I retain all messages received and sent, I know thus that I have not messaged that member.

There is no other way to check.
PJH
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by simplyjohn


Well I have different results. In the search field if I enter a members name I get all the messages received from them and those sent. If I enter a valid members name, and neither of the aforementioned applies, then I get no results. For me, since I retain all messages received and sent, I know thus that I have not messaged that member.

There is no other way to check.


Thank you for this.

What I am finding is that in SOME cases I do get messages received and sent but in others (and despite making absolutely certain that I type the username correctly) I get 'no results' despite the fact that I have a message sent to that person on the page I am looking at.

I did wonder if I had something in my settings because those that I just rechecked that are actually on my friends list I do get results for but you and I had some messages between us over my last query and they come up-despite you not being on my friends list.

Thanks again for your help.
Unknown User





Quote by PJH
Not a major problem but is there a simple way please of finding out if you have messaged someone before?

I could look through all of my sent posts although some have been deleted but is there any other way please?

Putting the person's username in search does not work because I have just tried that with someone that I have recently messaged and it came up as 'no messages found' which suggests it is only the message contents that get searched.

Just curious because I do not like bothering someone who has previously 'ignored' a message from me although I often start messages with "I do not think that I have messaged you before...."

Thank you.
Paul



If you'd like to keep track of messages you've sent out but didn't receive a reply from user, you can do this:

Go to SENT MESSAGES















You should wait a wk for any user to reply back. If they don't reply then it's ok.
Trust me when I say, you're not bothering anyone by sending a message wanting to chat w/ them.



PJH
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by IMPÜRETHOUGHTS










You should wait a wk for any user to reply back. If they don't reply then it's ok.
Trust me when I say, you're not bothering anyone by sending a message wanting to chat w/ them.





Thank you for taking the trouble to do this.

In my case, because I am not young, I ask a lady when I message her to look at my profile in case my age freaks her out.
I work on the assumption that if I do not get a response then they are not interested in me, which is fair enough.
On that basis, if they were not interested in me the first time they are not likely to be interested if I message them again.
That was why I try to check if I have messaged a lady before, if their account is relatively new I probably haven't but if the
account is of long-standing then, I might have done.
I do not message EVERY lady btw, just those that appeal to me in some way!
Thanks again.

edit-I think I will go through my existing sent messages to people that are not or were not friends and move them to a folder
as you suggest-at some point I must have deleted four months worth of messages because I have been active on here since April
2020 but messages only here from August 2020.

Paul
NicolasBelvoir
Active Ink Slinger
I think you are right, PJH, the search box for messages doesn't find messages when I search for a particular username.

A related issue is that I can't filter messages from a particular user. I can do this for online messages or chats, and that's useful, but there doesn't seem to be that option for the email-like messages.
Twisted_Skald
Chatterbox Blonde- Rumps Mystical Bartender
Quote by PJH


Thank you for taking the trouble to do this.

In my case, because I am not young, I ask a lady when I message her to look at my profile in case my age freaks her out.
I work on the assumption that if I do not get a response then they are not interested in me, which is fair enough.
On that basis, if they were not interested in me the first time they are not likely to be interested if I message them again.
That was why I try to check if I have messaged a lady before, if their account is relatively new I probably haven't but if the
account is of long-standing then, I might have done.
I do not message EVERY lady btw, just those that appeal to me in some way!
Thanks again.

edit-I think I will go through my existing sent messages to people that are not or were not friends and move them to a folder
as you suggest-at some point I must have deleted four months worth of messages because I have been active on here since April
2020 but messages only here from August 2020.

Paul


What I would suggest is if they've messaged me within the last week or so, I may have missed it or I wasn't interested. If they mail me again I'm going to respond if only to suggest they don't do it again.

If it's been more than a month I'm highly likely not to remember they mailed me. So if it pops in my inbox I'm not going to get all riled up about it and will probably respond.

So from your perspective there's no downside to mailing again. As long as you're civil, I don't object to being contacted by a man.
If you act like a jerk I have a block button to get you out of my sight.

I wouldn't sweat about it too much, you seem like a nice guy and I'm sure there's plenty of women out here who'd love to be contacted by you.

Also don't focus on your age so much. Sure you may have more miles on the clock than some others but it also means you have more life experience and you have more depth. The young guns aim for below the waist, the more mature aim for between the ears. The ones who aim between my ears have a much higher success rate in getting a response.

Whatever was posted is always meant in love and respect never to offend.
I'm also highly likely to have posted this from a phone so there may be typos or odd word changes, auto correct can be a pain.

I've been listening to my kinky pencil here's my current work
PJH
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by Twisted_Skald



I wouldn't sweat about it too much, you seem like a nice guy and I'm sure there's plenty of women out here who'd love to be contacted by you.

Also don't focus on your age so much. Sure you may have more miles on the clock than some others but it also means you have more life experience and you have more depth. The young guns aim for below the waist, the more mature aim for between the ears. The ones who aim between my ears have a much higher success rate in getting a response.




Thank you so much, I appreciate your advice.

I think that it is right that when contacting a lady that I make her aware of my age. Mostly because if she does respond then it seems that my age is not a barrier. I did have my age hidden on my profile briefly but did not want ladies freaking out if/when they discovered my age

Sometimes I get interest from ladies BECAUSE of my age, which is nice (I suppose).

Thanks again-I might message you one day!
Jen
Charming as fuck
Quote by PJH


...at some point I must have deleted four months worth of messages because I have been active on here since April
2020 but messages only here from August 2020.

Paul


That's an automatic thing. It only keeps a year of sent messages.
PJH
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by Jen


That's an automatic thing. It only keeps a year of sent messages.



Oh right.

I vaguely remember deleting a whole chunk of messages by mistake.