Lush Limericks

My life-plan, in simple language, is:

Nothing that grieves or anguishes

A girl with big knockers

Televised soccer

And limitless bacon sandwiches.

There once was a cute young lass

Who was witty and full of sass

What I did was wrong

Yet she remains strong

She always had such class

Lynangel is feeling remorse
For doing an act rather coarse
She talked a girl into bed
And then gave her head
A tongue-lashing tour de force.

Choices we make on our way

With us forever will stay

No single fault

Life doesn't halt

So just let us savor today

When Heidi goes out for a drive

There's a risk that she won't survive

Because, if I'm candid

She steers one-handed

So she'll come but she may not arrive.

I have a friend here who chose
To let me see private photos
But now they are gone
Permission's withdrawn
I'll rely on my memories, I suppose.

A fellow named Rob asked to see

A private album from me

Access was granted

But then he ranted

For the picts were not of nude me!

There was a young man from Calcutta

Who rubbed his equipment with butta.

Once he added toast,

He cried “I like this the most!”

Munch crunch, went the man from Calcutta.

My hand slowly caresses her thighs

Encouraged by the passionate sighs

My fingers are met

By lips very wet

Like an Elizabethan she soon dies.

A poignant verse Adam penned

With that twist right at the end

Catching off-guard

With ending unbarred

A tact that I recommend!

Rob's post was magnificent indeed

To that all around had agreed

A true work of art

Standing apart

Will with it he'll ever succeed?

The stamps in his passport were complimentary

He even had pages supplementary

He'd been down many ramps

To collect all those stamps

As he visited all those PORTS OF ENTRY!

.

innuendo R us

Heidi's road trip is quite entertaining

How many days are remaining?

What happens inside

Is quite a ride

The van shaking requires some explaining!

There was a young lady named Janet
Who loved being explored like a planet
By dogsled expeditions
And in many positions
Between poles strong and solid as granite.

A delightful Tale of Two Tails

Against which Two Cities pales

Heidi and Dee

Look good to me

There could be no possible fails!

Her play was quite demanding

And required clear understanding

Not for the weak

Or someone meek

For she was the one commanding

A biker chick from Arizona
Went to Bell Rock, near Sedona
She said she knew heights
Give me the frights
But if we climbed to the top, I could bone her.

.

I said that her offer was sound
But quailed at scaling that mound
With my acrophobia
I said let's disrobe here
And do it where it's safe, on the ground.

Arizona where it's hot and dry

There's one who passes that by

Makes me hot and wet

Maybe even to sweat

Every time she is neigh.

The lady that Rob always dated

Kept him happy and thoroughly sated

Until that fateful day

When he was having his way

And she busted a seam and deflated

No deflation has Rob endured

"To the finish" is always ensured

Such knowledge have I

Don't ask me why

Let's say it was privately secured

At times when I'm catching some flak

I'm glad that Lynnwitt has my back

But I change my tune

When I'm the small spoon

And here comes her strap-on attack.

The power of his prong was commendable

The speed of his jizz was dependable

Until one day Pete sighed

And looked up and cried,

“You DO know that I’m not expendable?”

Sirius, a star quite distant

Or, on Lush someone insistent

Similarities?

Opposite polarities?

Or, perhaps, coexistent?

A little spoon named Rob

Snuggled back holding his knob

But then with a jerk

He gave a wee spurt

And that was the end of THAT job!

--

Sorry, couldn't help myself!

Quote by lynnwitt

A little spoon named Rob

Snuggled back holding his knob

But then with a jerk

He gave a wee spurt

And that was the end of THAT job!

• mysel(Sorry... Couldn't help myself)

HAHAHA.....good one!

Lushies make jibes, bold and subtle

The barbs fly back and forth like a shuttle

'Til one hits home hard

Catching him or her off their guard

And pointed irony makes their ship scuttle

Barbs are meant as a tease

We really just like to please

But if it gets gritty

Well so's much the pity

For you'll be soon on your knees!

There was a young girl from Vorhees

Who spent most of her time on her knees

She insisted the view

Plus drops gathering like dew

Was enough. So easy to please!

Sirius forgot the new start

To please one young woman was simple

You needed only to tickle the dimple

Above her ass cheeks.

You could do that for weeks!

And then she’d replace her stiff wimple…