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New Flash Jokes: I will start

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Hasabrain2
Active Ink Slinger
This just in:


Police seize 100 rolls of toilet paper inside two tons of cocaine.



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Add your own news flash joke.
Hasabrain2
Active Ink Slinger
Just to be clear News Flash jokes don't have to be about the pandemic. Just something funny or even corny like:


Sales at marijuana dispensaries are high.
Unknown User
Ok, you made me laugh but I have nothing to share at this moment.
Unknown User
This is an actual headline

Man threatens to sue magazine for using his photo in article about hipsters looking alike, before realising it isn't him
Master_Jonathan
Active Ink Slinger
Power outage covers entire town - film at 11:00!