What a great topic. For us, we feel Meggsy handled the first step really nicely. That's to have someone you know and hopefully the vibe will let you broach the topic, and both sides feel similarly about it. We have a lot of single and hitched friends who wouldn't think of having an open relationship. The ones who do are rare and are often shy about bringing it up. But when we get to know someone really well, we have no trouble working into the topic. It either works or it doesn't, but when it moves forward, it can be amazing.
Our most recent open lover is a girl from AJ's job who has fit in completely...she's such a contrast to Raq....very tall, blonde with highlights, light skin, and experienced and open and willing. The sex is incredibly explosive either separately or together. This could become something a little stronger than just sex, but as always, we move a little more slowly than everyone might like, but we create something wonderful. We've met people on vacation and online and through swingers clubs, but we find the attachment with someone close just adds to the power of the whole relationship.
AJ and she started talking and just got along so well that they were inseparable for a long time. Then Raq came into the picture a few months later when she saw how exciting it was getting for them. She loved that AJ and Lynn were intoxicated with each other and fell in lust with her when she met her 2 New Year's Eves ago. She stays over with us a lot now.
A lot of it is luck...you really have to fall into finding the right person(s). But when you do....wow.
Don't be afraid to hint around with people who interest you. It can very definitely pay off!
We really wish you a lot of luck!
Rookie Scribe