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Buz
Over 90 days ago
Straight Male, 40
0 miles · Atlanta

Forum

Quote by MrLosAngeles
Hilarious stuff..what's next, consumers? WD-40 as a sexual lube?


There's a thread around here somewhere dedicated to WD-40 as a sexual lube. I prefer the squeeze can rather than the spray can. That stuff hurts if you spray it in your eye or get some up your nose.dyriTmZSrI2fOaZ6



I can't imagine that asshole bleaching is good for your health. And who does that? Is there a roadside stand somewhere with a sign that says:

Hot Boiled Peanuts & Asshole Bleaching
From what I've heard starting cheap from about $10,000 (US) and goes up, up & way up!
Attempting to log off Lush when using a samsung galaxy is near impossible. Could a clickable feature be added to do that? The scroll down from Account is extremely difficult to use on these samsung galaxys. I'm sure it is because these things aren't the easiest things in the world to use.
Quote by MrLosAngeles
Isn't this over yet?


Aren't you from Los Angeles where they remake everything over and over again.

When will the Die Hard movies end? Is there another Rocky in the wings?

Oh well here's another funny one...

Before the trial started she said that she would never be convicted. Right now I think her attorneys are just trying to save her from the death penalty.

Word of advice stemming from the Jodi Arias trial to all guys: Never tell a psycho ex-girlfriend that just spent the night having sex with you that you are going on vacation with another girl.
Quote by scooter


Your an awesome dude Pete.

Is that really you? (on your pro-file)


Y'all really should check out Pete's stories. They are superb! Pete is Piquet so just check out www.lushstories.com/piquet
Enjoy a cigar and bourbon then go for another round or two.
Happy Birthday to Dude McMasterBlaster better known as WellMadeMale. I hope you have a great birthday and that they let you out of the nursing home for a day trip to the strip joint.

I accept friend requests from anyone who is not a serial killer.
Probably swimming since it would exercise the most muscles at once and supply the aerobics one needs.
Happy Birthday Martina! You are a great Lush friend and a great Lushie! Have an awesome birthday!

Quote by MrLosAngeles
There's after sex?


Yes, that's when my wife wants me to rub her feet while she enjoys a cigar and a brandy. But instead I have a cognac and a joint, she has to share, which leads to...more sex. At some point we have to stop!
Love...it is what it is and it ain't what it ain't.

— Buzocles


Next time I wear a toga I ain't using a king size sheet, hell this things wrapped around me 4 or 5 times.
This looks like a cockfight. Louisiana was the last state in the USA to outlaw cockfighting. Does cockfighting hurt? Is it better to be the bigger cock or the smarter cock?

North African Cocks? Is that the name of a football team?


It would be hard to get one to fit me but maybe this one. I'd have some shoulder room, plus you could see my tattoos. But I'd wear a pope hat and cowboy boots with it, and be carrying a 12 pack of Sam Adams in a bottle. Maybe Sprite would be my date for the evening.

PS. Kerry Washington sure looks hot!!!!!

Since I am not into necrophilia I'll have to go with someone living, Charleze Theron.

I'm still waiting on Makavelli to post the post the real best Harlem Shake. It's him out in Hawaii wearing a lay and a grass skirt and nothing else. I read on The Smoking Gun that someone said "Book him Dano" after he got finished.
I came out $20 ahead betting on the Oscars. I was damned sure Argo would win Best Picture and Daniel Day Lewis would get the Oscar for playing Lincoln. I went on on a limb on Christopher Waltz though and he paid off. Damn I really like him, he's cool as fuck.

I did like Argo and Django* a lot but my favorite movie this past year was Skyfall.

Do any of y'all like to sneak cold beer into the theater like I do? I get my wife to carry her extra large purse and fill it full of cold beer. If I put too many beers in there though, she makes me carry the purse. That does little for my ultra cool macho image.

*Okay Jack there ya go...Django the D is silent. Silent damnit!

I agree with Magical Felix, that West Coast pothead, that Christopher Waltz probably deserved the overall Best Actor Award, and Leonardo DiCaprio was great as that scummy plantation slave owner. DiCaprio really turned a corner in that movie The Departed. He went from fluffy little pretty boy to a real actor.

I'm still waiting for a serious nomination for Samuel L. Jackson. Jackson continues to crank out some the best acting consistently in all of Hollywood and he just does not get the credit and praise he deserves. What will it take? Will Samuel L. Jackson have to whip Speilberg's ass on the stage at the Oscar ceremony or something. That would sure improve their TV ratings!

Oh, I almost forgot. Quentin Tarantino was drunk. I would have laughed my ass off if he'd have puked on the stage. You go Quentin you crazy talented fuck!
Quote by Magical_felix


It's D J A N G O. The D is silent, hillbilly.


Sorry 'bout that dyslexic spelling Jack but now that I see it I think I like Durango better than Django. How's that you Cailfornia grape jockey fresh out of an ashram?

You know I'm southern and there's never been a syllable I didn't want to add another one to, so this silent letter stuff is just annoying and aw shucks, it confuses my sensibilities.

PS. You bring the weed and I'll supply some corn liquor that will make that fleece of hair fall right off your back and you won't have to wax anymore.

And that's Mr. Hillbilly to you sir.
So far I've never seen a movie that quite lived up to the depth of quality that the book did.
Damn I love good stand up comedians.

Jeff Foxworthy
Eddie Murphy
Dave Chappell
I asked my womans if her breasts made her. I said, "Hey womans, do your big breasts make you?" My womans laughed at me and answered, "Silly you know the doctor charged me a pretty penny for these things." They are just big C-cups. I actually liked 'em a little better before. At least with those pierced nipples though I can make them dance when I wear a magnet cock ring.

I had to wake my wife up again so she can watch The Oscars. She keeps dozing off. I can't watch the whole thing or I'd be dozing so I googled which A-list actors have never won. Surprising in many instances, some probably not.

Maybe some of these will get lucky tonight, most won't.

Actresses who haven't won:
Glenn Close
Naomi Watts
Annette Benning
Sigourney Weaver
Michelle Pfeiffer
Julianne Moore
Laura Linney
Uma Thurman

Actors who haven't won:
Gary Oldman
Liam Neeson
Harrison Ford
Samuel L. Jackson
Johnny Depp
Peter O'Toole (8 nominations bit ZERO wins. That sucks!)
Leonardo DiCaprio
Will Smith
Brad Pitt
Ed Norton
Robert Downey, Jr.
Ed Harris
Tom Cruise
Mel Gibson
Quote by naughtynurse
10)Any old school loony tunes smile


Looney Tunes cartoons are great! They are timeless classics!
I did ribeyes on the grill after marinating them in a red wine & soy mix. I grilled them with pineapples and mushrooms, made sweet creamed white corn, and cooked new potatoes with pepper and garlic in a wok. We had red wine with dinner and in an hour my wife was snoozing on the sofa.
Yes my wife has pierced nipples. I love to get a powerful magnet out and make her titties dance with that thing! 2 magnets is the most fun!
Hey! When's someone going to do a Story where the great-grandparents do the ole switcheroo swap thing? Now that'd be some wild . Out come the false teeth off come the granny panties and whoowie the great-grandparents swap off partners. Are how about a nekkid family reunion turns into a huge orgy, only family members allowed, non-relative visitors have to just watch? That'd be some kind hootenanny! Yehaaa!
What are your Top 10 Comedy TV shows?

1 - Seinfeld
2 - Dave Chappell
3 - South Park
4 - Beavis & Butthead
5 - Archer
6 - Andy Griffeth
7 - 3rd Rock From The Sun
8 - My Name Is Earl
9 - Friends
10 - Jackass
I think its a long term investment. If you are looking for the ultimate payoff, a permanent relationship. Yes you continually woo them, never stop flirting, keep up the romance, try new things with the sex, and have lots of sex.

Just because someone is married or in a long term relationship is no reason to stop trying to look good either. Make yourself hot and desirable. Stay in shape. Working out together is just one more activity you can share in building your relationship.

My wife and I enter 5k's, 10k's together, bicycle races and we go over each other's work out routine as true partners giving each other tips and advice and doing it together. Find you common interests and expand on those.

Cooking together is a great way to woo each other. Feeding each other a taste of the food while you cook it not only tests how good you are preparing the food but there is just something sexy about feeding food to your partner.

And make each other laugh!