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Buz
Over 90 days ago
Straight Male, 40
0 miles · Atlanta

Forum

Quote by RumpleForeskin
All hail the brilliance and/or dumb luck, of the 'His Awesomeness' Buz The Linebacker. For just as a broken clock is right twice a day, so too was Buz when he suggested a cure for my 'hidden' stories problem.

The world may little note his achievement, and those that do could well view it with disapprobation, thinking that hiding/deleting/terminating with extreme prejudice all my stories would be a boon to western civilization...but his name will be placed on the Rumplations Hall of Fame just as soon as we get the door to the out-of-order men's room fixed, honest. ;)

More coffee for Jeff, and two neat fingers for Scott. Now what about the rest of you miserable Monday miscreants?

.


Yay! Your stories are back!

...and I thought the zenith of my immortalization was reached when my old fraternity emblazoned my name along with a man on a motorcycle drawing on a wooden plaque and hung it by the main staircase in the old frat house. ...um, I may have reenacted that motorcycle up the staircase scene from National Lampoon's Animal House, a few times at the peak of fraternity parties, especially toga parties. (Maybe at almost every major party.) And the time my toga snagged on the banister, uh, well, I'd given my boxers to my girlfriend to wear while wearing her undies like a crown on my head. So, anyhow, um, togaless. You can figure that one out. No reason to stop my motorcycle ride though. I mean, there wasn't anyone innocent there, so they didn't see anything they hadn't seen before. Yeah, my frat used that movie like a Bible of how to be a fraternity. And yes, A few of us were called to meet with the Dean on occasion.

So I'll take the Rumpilations Hall of Fame and uh...

Ice cold draft beer in a glass mug with a bit of a head for me.
Quote by seeker4
Yawn. Afternoon starting to drag. How about a whiskey down here? Two fingers of rye, neat.

To my everlasting shock and delight, I have written the final chapter of Curt and Julia's saga (well, a good draft of it, anyway). I have also planned out a retitling and new one-liners for the rest so that the whole mess runs together better. I'll implement that in the run up to posting the final chapter. Just need to confirm with one of my mod friends that it's okay.

Actually, Buz is here, maybe he can comment. If I change titles and taglines on five stories, would be it okay to go through them at once or will it require re-verification and therefore should be one at a time?


Those will take no time at all. Just send them on with a Note to Mods that you've only changed title and tags. Of course we'd see that there are no other changes. Easy breezy.

Of course if I catch 'em I might add in some secret subliminals. smile
Okay, I'm putting y'all on notice... I better see Naughty NASCAR in first place in the poll soon or you're all in trouble. I mean trouble - T-R-O-U-B-L-E... big trouble!!! Grrrrrrr...

I don't want to have to unleash the Crack-un. Giant size butt crack monster.

Quote by RumpleForeskin
Tawny! Dig out that gallon jug of 'EverClear'. Buz says he's ready for some serious drinking.

But seriously, thanks for the 'heads up' Buz. BTW, I need a bit of mod-type help. Somehow, I've managed to 'hide' all my stories. No stories show up on my profile and the links in my sig line don't work. This may be a Gav issue, and I've already sent him a PM, but odds are he's a tad busy about now. If you could take a look and/or provide some sage wisdom and counsel, I'd be much obliged.

Ms P, one glass of red wine coming up. There's no label on the bottle, but I'm told the color is correct. ;)

Any more calls for alcohol?



Bill, I would think clicking Show Stories would bring them back up. If that's not working, uh, hmmm... ugh... I'm not sure. I've posted a query on this with the mods to get you help on it. You've already notified Gav. I hope we get this worked out for you soon

Meanwhile... ice cold beer!
Quote by RumpleForeskin
Tawny! Dig out that gallon jug of 'EverClear'. Buz says he's ready for some serious drinking.

But seriously, thanks for the 'heads up' Buz. BTW, I need a bit of mod-type help. Somehow, I've managed to 'hide' all my stories. No stories show up on my profile and the links in my sig line don't work. This may be a Gav issue, and I've already sent him a PM, but odds are he's a tad busy about now. If you could take a look and/or provide some sage wisdom and counsel, I'd be much obliged.

Ms P, one glass of red wine coming up. There's no label on the bottle, but I'm told the color is correct. ;)

Any more calls for alcohol?



Bill, I would think clicking Show Stories would bring them back up. If that's not working, uh, hmmm... ugh... I'm not sure. I've posted a query on this with the mods to get you help on it. You've already notified Gav. I hope we get this worked out for you soon

Meanwhile... ice cold beer!
Y'all should keep this in mind, especially if Lushtories is the home base for your stories and poems. There is a good chance that your stories have been stolen, copied, and plagiarized on one or several of the unscrupulous sex story sites that constantly pop up online.

I have had had this problem several times. Most of our popular authors here have. That's why we do those copyright notices. But that does not stop it from happening.

If you delete your account and your stories here, with the date published is no longer available as proof that you are the original author, in the future other sites you may want to post on might think you are the plagiarizer of the story you wrote. Why? Because that story may be published somewhere else without your permission, by someone else, and you won't be able to show that you published it here first.


PS. I need a lot of hard liquor. Grain alcohol will work just fine.

I know things!!! If you don't vote for Naughty NASCAR, I will find out and I will find you.


Remember people, we have added the option for you to block story categories you do not want to see. I am sure that most members here have anywhere from one to three, four or five categories that turn them off. We are all adults and have enough intelligence to ignore what we don't like. Let others with different tastes enjoy theirs without being so judgemental. Please exhibit your ability to be open-minded, liberal, and allowing others to be themselves.

Seriously, to anyone with ultra-conservative Puritan values, every category we have is unacceptable. To those who would suppress any opinions other than what they believe in, our Think Tank would be unacceptable. So now is a good time to show tolerance. This is a place for fantasy. The Fantasy category is just that, fantasy. Can you imagine if we did extensive research and investigation and purged every member who isn't exactly what they say they are, doesn't look like the way they promote they do, etc.? On Lushstories you can be who you are or who you want to be.

Lushstories is the best place, socially and for quality short erotic literature on the internet. Make the best of it!

I am 100% supportive of Lushstories being as successful as possible, and that very much includes financial success. The site cannot last without that.

Our story verifying team will hold every category to the same high standards before we allow it to be published here.

And abide by Buz's new slogan: 'Lush On!'

Or I'll go all linebacker on you.

Quote by Adagio
In basketball, my Cats (barely) won first came of season. I have poem posted with my friend Denim_Daisy10. My coffee is piping hot and 'licious. Have a good day.


I, of course, 100% pull for the University of Georgia Bulldog basketball team. Though the basketball team has never come close to the success of the football team, the baseball team, the golf team, the legendary men's tennis team, the legendary women's gymnastic team, the equestrian team, the legendary women's swimming & diving team, etc and etc.

But with Maten being cleared by the NCAA to return after an attempt to turn pro and several returning experienced players and some fresh new talent, this could be a pretty good year for the Dawgs on the court. A new freshman, 6'11" named Claxton may have an immediate impact. His dad was a Dawg in the early 90s and stood at 7' tall, was known for shot blocking, rebounding, and muscling other big guys around. The younger Claxton is considered much more athletic.

I usually attend about two-thirds of the men's basketball games in Athens in Stegman Coliseum. Yes, the building that legendary Georgia football player, as well as Miami Dolphin former Super Bowl MVP, Jake Scott, rode his motorcycle over the top of. And not far away was a hole in a parking lot from where Georgia Bulldog football player and former wrestling superstar and world champ, Bill Goldberg, exploded a hand grenade. Athletes can get a bit rowdy.
Quote by Denim_Daisy10

It's gonna be a tough game especially since it's in Atlanta.. Hokies play at noon EST so a 10;am Arizona kick off ....



I wanna my neighbor for mowing his weeds at 6:30 am


Best of Luck to your Hokies, Daisy. May they squish those insects!

My Dawgs are going to be in a huge battle against our oldest rival, Auburn. The Deep South's Oldest Rivalry. The UGA and Auburn varsity football teams have played each other in every single year of their existence, starting in 1892. Go Dawgs!
Quote by RumpleForeskin
Booze and beer. Beer and booze. Sounds like winners, to me.

And for the, AptToBeAWESOME one, a JD and Coke.

Mega-congrats on the well deserved recognition. No doubt about it, the Awesome Awards started a tad slow with first Buz, then your bewildered barkeep befouling the first two spots.. But since then the quality of the recipients has been on a steep rise.

So who's gonna order a drink or drinks to celebrate the awesomeness of our Apt?



Rumpy, we're like Atlas holding up the world. Two pillars of strength. Yeah, that's it. Besides, we're SEC fans.

In fact, feeling my southerness, I'll have some ice cold Terrapin Pale Ales with shots of Southern Comfort.
All of Lushstories major competitors, the large erotic story sites, have as one of their categories and it is hugely popular. It was very popular here for many years. was a Lushstories category a lot longer than it wasn't one. Whether we, you, myself, or anyone else likes it or not, fantasy generates massive views which a site like this translates into ad revenue in order to stay online and financially viable.

There are compromises in every phase of your lives. If anyone says not, then they are lying. So we'd like to keep this great site going and successful.

Before I discovered Lushstories I wrote on another site. That site did not allow and all characters had to be 18 years of age rather than 16. Unfortunately, that site eventually failed financially from poor sponsorship which resulted from a much lower view count. So all the stories I had posted there went away with the site into the abyss of nothingness.

The internet is not run as a communistic or socialistic experiment. Our competitor sites are not going to share their revenue with us to keep us going. It's fucking competition just like real life and the history of the planet. The strongest survive.

Plus, we've gone to great lengths to make this site even more user-friendly and set up for your personal use. YOU CAN BLOCK ANY STORY CATEGORY YOU DON'T LIKE! No one is forced to read any story or category they don't want to. We now have quite a wide range of story category selections. Read the ones you like.
Yay! Curvy!!! Congratulations! And thanks for all the great work you do.

Congratulations Lesley Lulu Barton on the Awesome Award! Sprite is always right on target.

It is great to have you here and being awesome, making people feel great and doing great things.

=d>
Quote by DamonX


Damn....

I had to do a quick google search of that one...

I think I found a new screen saver.


Rumpy, I'll take one of those ice cold beers. Roy Moore? Figures he'd be a big ole phony-assed hypocrite. Those judgemental religious legalist always, and I mean ALWAYS, are fakes!

I've been working my ass off. Dammit! I want to have some fun sometime. Beer! Beer! Beer!
Quote by Verbal
Now that we have a safe space for tentacle sex, it's time to expand our horizons: robot sex!


Like WestWorld? Now that's a cool idea. Humanoid robots who have emotions and feelings just like any real person but implanted memories.

AND BIG BOUNCY TITTIES!!!
Our new categories should add to the fun for our Lushstories authors. Even more reason for fun and optimism but especially to peak those creative juices. Take the challenge y'all and write something for one of the new categories.

Jack Daniels on the rocks for me. I hope y'all have great evening and a night cap. Cheers!
Quote by sprite
here's the rule i go by. if i get to the door first, and someone else is coming through, i hold it open. man, woman, old, young, doesn't matters. it's not about age or gender, it's just about being polite to another human being.


My policy too.
Quote by WellMadeMale


Never any horseplay in the athletic showers?

Hell, I've caught guys pissing on my legs and I've returned the favor after big-game wins and juvenile excitement those outcomes created - of course it was many years ago and very little actual enjoyment (except for a certain revenge factor) was harvested.

About 20 years ago, a woman I was seeing, absolutely wouldn't quit pestering me to give her a golden facial in the shower. At first I was repulsed, but then... to solve another issue, I was game and I acquiesced. She was writhing in ecstasy, on her knees with hot water from the shower head blasting us from above her head.

I think she opened her mouth and I think she aimed my stream towards her tongue. I say I think because after 11 beers I was pretty loaded and really had to urinate. She controlled the nozzle direction, I simply controlled the bladder release.

I pissed on her as a trade-off for her dropping her insistent pleading to fuck my ass with her strap-on. I think I got the better end of that entire deal, so-to-speak.


Not that kind of horseplay. Just twisting up wet towels as tight as we could and popping each other, leaving big whelps. Or hiding someone's clothes. But I haven't partaken in any golden shower stuff. Though I wouldn't mind pissing in a few politician's faces.
Quote by Adagio
What about a "Gunslinger" category, for western cowboys.


...and I thought gunslingers were California gigolos.
Quote by LYFBUZ


No one tell Buz that the mascot of his beloved Bulldogs is named "Que" short for 'Quebec", a province in Canada


Alright Lyfbuz, you're on treacherous ground. I've got people keeping an eye on you.


Yes, Bill, your guys with the fleur de lis on their helmets are playing some damn good football. Where as my pro team might as well remove that bird of prey and replace it with Tweety Bird. Time for a name change, our QB Matty Ice is now Matty Ice Melt and his crew of mental wimps.

The Falcons, no one can argue against, are one of the most talent-loaded teams in the NFL but now just wimp out when the game gets tough. It's professional football so in my opinion, when the product turns shitty, don't patronize for it. Though I believe Arthur Blank is going to get very tired of his team's poor performance when he is paying them so much, so heads may soon roll.

I may have to turn to the right fiddle and steel guitar country music song.

I'm ready for a drink. I'm in the mood for some fine Kentucky bourbon. Maybe a Maker's Mark. And an expensive cigar.

So, a toast to you, Bill, and the fine folks of Rumpilations.
I really don't know how I am perceived ever since the pictures of me were removed from all the US Post Offices after I entered the federal government witness protection program.

Quote by Adagio
I would imagine that many think of me as dark, due to some of my writings. Actually, I consider myself as a "straight up" male with a fantastic personality. I write only to entertain myself, hoping some of it rubs off on the readers. My life is full and my better half knows I enjoy writing. A few of my poems have been in some local mags which I am proud of. Also, I have mention before, that I most enjoy collaborations. Not being gifted, I do think that Lush has made me a better writer. I owe that to the mods, that have pushed me to improve. All that being said, most of the writer's on Lush who chat with me, know of my integrity.


Al, I've always pictured you in your bookstore dressed a lot like Colonel Sanders, writing your poems on paper before turning to your computer keyboard. Also, that you have a foul-mouthed talking parrot in your store and you and the parrot often get in arguments over the parrot's use of bad words of which you don't approve. And that you have lunch everyday at the same southern soul food diner, that offers great collard greens and fried green tomatoes (now I'm making myself hungry). And more, that you have a secret vault in your store full of rare and very expensive books, possibly having a manuscript with the truth behind the Knights Templar and where their treasure is hidden.

Am I close?
In an early job after college I was sexually harassed by a woman vice president of the company I worked for. She was probably late thirties and she constantly came to my little cubicle to 'check on me' as she'd say. She'd ask if there was anything she could do to help me excel at my work, help me to fit in at the company, etc. She was very touchy, running her hands through my hair and telling me how sensuous my short hair cut felt. She rubbed my butt if no one was around to see.

She was not my direct boss, but rather over a department that mine did not answer directly to. But she was a vice president and she actually outranked my boss. The woman had very big titties and would come look over my shoulder pressing her tits against me. She'd catch me in the break room or anywhere she could, always getting too close, into my personal space, and usually find a way to press her breasts against me. She'd ask me out for drinks after work, ask me to lunch, and this went on and on. I always came up with an excuse and also told her I had a girlfriend. That didn't phase her.

My defense was that I worked in sales and with a supplied company car, had a territory that I needed to go out and service and seek new client leads. So I stayed away from the office as much as possible, coming in late after my sales day after big titty vice president had left for the day, or come in early and get out to make my rounds as early as possible.

I complained to my boss, a guy, who basically said there was nothing he could do. She outranked him and in fact, she was a partner in the business and he was not. Some coworkers had noticed and told me that I was evidently her new target, that she had a long history of targeting new young male employees. And that if any of them caved and had sex with her, she'd get possessive and controlling of them. In every instance they'd end up quitting their job there and she'd be vindictive in trying to mess them up about getting another job.

Eventually, because I was creative at finding ways to avoid her, she eased off. But it never totally ended until I changed jobs. Except for her, I would have liked the job and had been earned the salesperson of the month award several times by selling the most volume.

I didn't feel as trapped as I think a female would feel in the same situation with a male executive doing the same things. Getting out of the office as much as I did made it much more bearable. But I guess I always felt I could find another job if it got too bad. I ended up having a new job offer for a much better job even though I hadn't been looking for one. That worked out great.
Quote by NymphWriter


Hey... I married a Canadian and I've never been happier.


See, you've been brainwashed already. He probably used the maple syrup torture on you and you can't remember a thing. Those Canadians are a sneaky and dangerous bunch, I tell you.

Beware of the Maple Leaf!
Quote by sprite


Shame on you, Buz. you, of all people should know that talk of dawgs beating cocks goes against TOS. on the ground, now, and give me 50.


I did 50 one arms. smile

Here's something for you to wear, Sprite.



I'm having hot coffee – black!