Quote by NymphWriter
My relationship with my parents has evolved over time.

For years I was super close with my mom, but after I had my son and two failed marriages, she seemed to get mean. Though she loves my son & my current husband, I feel she's pulled away from me. I'm not sure if it's because I moved away twice (once to a different city, once to a new state) or refused to whine about how shitty all men are. Maybe it's because I can see through her lies and bullshit.

I know my mom was adopted. This was never a secret. Her mom died three weeks after my son was born (a haunting memory for me) she called me the day before a completely disabling stroke to talk about my son who was a week old (seven days exactly.) I think this was why I had so much trouble accepting the truth that she was gone. It took a phone bill to prove my story was true. Sometimes I think my mom is angry with me for being the one who got to say goodbye. My mom sought out her birth family and found them (somewhat.) Though they are very nice people, they are not my family. They may share DNA with me, but they are not my family.

I was never close with my dad as a child. I saw him spending time with me out of court ordered obligation. I hated that. I wanted him to love me for me. All I ever heard was his criticism and complaints. Nothing I did was ever good enough for him. It was to the point that I just gave up.

Now, over the last fifteen years I've gotten much closer with my dad. My dad kept his distance due to my venom my mom spewed. Now that he and I are rebuilding our relationship, I think my mom is angry about this. Five years ago my dad lost his wife. It nearly destroyed him. I had to really be there for him. It's really brought us closer. Maybe my husband played a major role in this... I don't know.

I wish my mom & I had what we had. But for that to happen, she needs to let go of her anger and right now, I don't see that happening. I've tried reaching out to her but she's slapping my hand back (metaphorically speaking of course.) I can only hope it changes before it's too late, but it must be something she's willing to participate in.