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Liz
Over 90 days ago
Lesbian Female, 31
0 miles · England

Forum

Quote by Green_Man
The picture reminds me of Blofeld's lair in the Swiss Alps during the movie On Her Majesty's Secret Service.




On Her Majesty's Sex Service: A XXX Parody

"Do you expect me to talk?"

"No, Mr. Bond, I expect you to come."

Edit: Actually, that was Goldfinger... still a good porn title though, lol.
Nice photo. Looks chilly. Brrrr!

I made Buz one of these last winter. I'm now taking orders. smile

Quote by Magical_felix
You're actually going about this in completely the wrong way.


It's just a hypothetical deliberation on a forum. A bit of a 'you've got a body, how do you dispose of it?' thought exercise fun.

You can't start a casual discussion thread by asking people to plan a whole murder soup to nuts.

I'm seeing some potential issues with a few of these suggestions.

Mailing it through the U.S. Postal Service
- A body is too large to send in one piece through the postal service so it would need chopping up and mailing in pieces.
- Risk of contents being detected by an automated security process like X-Ray or manual inspection due to the smell of decomposition.
- Possibility of trace evidence on the packages: fingerprints, DNA, other geologically unique materials.
- Possiblity of identification through CCTV at USPS mailing point, payment of postage, etc.
- Who would you mail it to?!

BBQ
- Advanced understanding of human anatomy required to dissect and filet a human body.
- Still have the issue of disposing of bones and other body parts that are not consumed from the grill.
- Huge amount of physical trace evidence to clean up in your own home.
- Risk of detection if any diseases or pathogens are passed onto your dinner guests from the recently deceased.

Piranhakeet
- Fantasy creature.

Hydrofluoric acid in a 50-gallon acrylic barrel
- Hydrofluoric acid is toxic and corrosive, but actually isn't that strong of an acid compared to other hydrohalic acids; the fluorine has a very good orbital overlap with hydrogen and is also not very polarisable, therefore it resists donating its proton, unlike other hydrohalic acids which are good proton donators. It will break down some tissues, but it will take a relatively long time and won't turn the entire body into stuff that can be rinsed down the drain. Hydrochloric acid is a much stronger acid, and as it has several uses from pH-balancing pool water to preparing concrete surfaces, it's available by the gallon from any hardware store. However, it isn't very good at dissolving bodies either; while it will eventually work by breaking down the connective tissues, it will make a huge stink and take several days to dissolve certain types of tissues and bones.
- You also have the issue of sourcing 50 gallons of Hydrofluoric acid. The stuff you buy from hardware stores is a fairly low dilution of the acid for safety reasons. To source stronger, purer versions you would need to purchase it through a specialist chemical supply company which would leave a paper trail.
- Barrel dump or contents clean up? Either has its own set of risks.

Burial in the Arizona desert
- Small risk of trace evidence being left in or on the vehicle but adquete measures could be taken to minimise this.
- Burying a body deep enough to avoid carrion-eating birds and animals detecting and digging it up would be a long, hard task. Additional help may be required. The longer the disposal takes the greater the risk of being detected.

Blowing it up using over the counter untraceable materials
- A detailed knowledge required of explosives and bomb-making.
- Depending on the materials you chose to use, the purchase of some innocuous over-the-counter substances are still monitored by authorities for anti-terrorism purposes.
- All of the bomb fragments left behind would tell investigators what was used to make the bomb and could provide them leads to tracking down where the materials were purchased. It would also indicate that it was of amateur construction and almost certainly researched on the internet. Unless very technically saavy, evidence could have been left behind of your 'research' activities.

Extra-terrestrials
- They'll only take a body off your hands if you arrange it through this guy.



Feeding it to pigs
- Who do you know who has a pig farm and would be happy for you to feed them a chopped-up body?
- Trace is still left behind in the excrement including bone fragments, and DNA can leech into the soil and be detectable for years.
- It's still not a fast method of disposal. According to the CDC, the average American man is 5 feet, 9 inches and houses about 195.5 pounds of flesh and bone. For a hungry pig, that’s a week, maybe a week and a half of lunches. So you would need a lot of pigs.
- Pulling the teeth and other associated prep work would leave a lot of trace evidence on you, the work area, and all of the tools used so all would need to be extremely well cleaned afterwards.

Industrial mincers / wood chippers / etc
- Gaining access to the machiney (unless of course you work with it, in which case it's already a terrible idea due to the small suspect pool investigators would be looking at).
- Risk of detection - you can't do it during the day.
- Huge amount of physical trace left behind. Even industrial mincers will leave bone fragments etc behind which would be detected.

Not having a body to begin with
- Too late. Got a body.

DIY cremation
- Cremation of a dead body is carried out at a temperature ranging between 1400 to 1800 degrees Fahrenheit. The cremation chamber is designed to dry out the body, burn off the skin and hair, contract and char the muscles, vaporise the soft tissues, and finally calcifiy the bones so that they eventually crumble. The gases released during the process are discharged through an exhaust system where the emissions are processed to destroy the smoke and vaporise the gases that would smell. The smell of burning a corpse is going to be the biggest issue with this method of disposal. You would detect that Eau de Dead Guy from miles away.
- You would also need to collect every minute remnant after the blaze for disposal - this would be a big task. On average, it takes about one to three hours to cremate a human body, thereby reducing it to 3-7 pounds of cremains. Metal fillings, implants, pacemakers, and all manner of other things would also need to be collected as they would not be completely consumed in the fire.
5,000,000 views! That's awesome.

Congratulations!
No worries.

The option is near the bottom of the 'Your Profile Page' section.

Quote by darkroot50
I'm hoping there is a member on here who can help guide me in using a VPN. You can reply here or send me a message. Thanks.


What would you like help with?
Some of these ideas have been bounced around in the past. The bone of contention in each case I believe was that it is unfair to exclude anyone (except judges obviously) from any competition. Mods are just normal members who volunteer to help verify stories or look after the forum/chatrooms, why should they be excluded from anything?

With regards to providing detailed critiques of entries, that would be a monumental undertaking. Judges would have to submit notes on each story they read, then those would have to be collated and rewritten into something meaningful for each entry. None of this is needed in the current process so would be a lot of extra work.

With regard to competition rules, any that apply are posted on the competition page itself.
Quote by kiteares
she is left with a whole bunch of great comments on her story, the final rating it got and then nothing.


Don't forget the profile 'Contestant' badge. Those things are sexy.

As for the 'glass ceiling' comment, I believe Ping was trying to point out that the phrase was misused because it refers to a situation in which progress appears to be possible but restrictions or discrimination create a barrier that prevents it. It's usually used in the context of someones profession and most often applies to women and members of minorities being denied the opportunity to obtain upper-level positions.

I see a few inherent problems here. The most obvious one is that the site is being asked to classify some authors as 'rookies'. The only way do this fairly without attempting to qualify the quality of someone's work would be to only apply it to first time competition entrants. This doesn't work in all cases as previous winners have included first time entrants who were seasoned writers on other erotica sites and definitely not new to the activity. Some people may also object to being labelled a 'rookie' just because they haven't entered a competition before.

Just sayin'.
Big congrats to Saucymh, WannabeWordsmith, and DarkSide!

Super spooky competition entries!
Quote by sprite
the platinum blonde is actually Elsa, Anna's sister. that said...



Stop posting our private photos on the forum.
All sorted now. Thanks, everyone!

Local kebab shop took it off my hands.
Quote by Magical_felix
And really why wouldn't you use a Z instead of an S in minimise. Say it out loud. That's a fucking Z sound.


I use proper English.
Quote by Ping
Anyone heard of Robert Pickton AKA The Pig Farmer Killer?

Yup. That's how he disposed of the bodies, until someone tripped on a femur. It wasn't humerus, it was indeed a femur.

He was reported to have murdered between 6-49 people. He was convicted of six, but confessed to forty-nine. Oddly enough, one of Canada's most popular weekly lotteries is called 6/49. A coincidence?

After this, I couldn't look at Piglet the same way again.


If you were going to commit a murder, how would you dispose of the body to minimise the risk of being linked to it by forensic evidence?
Quote by oldenuff2knobetter
I’m happy to report that the site has stayed online all day. Well done to whoever waved his magic wand and made lush useable. Very happy bunny xx


He doesn't wave a magic wand exactly. He's unzips his trousers and...

Gav: "Liz!"

Sorry.
I went blue once for a giggle. Felt all Sci-Fi.
I think it would be okay. You're not writing the characters as Joker and Harley, but rather people dressed up as them for a party. Therefore, it's not fanfic.
Quote by KatKliffe
Wasn't sure whether to post this here or in Writer's Resources, but this is a lot more technical so I'll post it here. What are the maximum dimensions allowed for a cover image before the site automatically resizes them to fit? I tried right-clicking one to get the image properties but Lush doesn't allow that. Any info will be helpful.


I believe the max width is 590px. I don't think there is a maximum height dimension though, so you can use a large portrait image.
Working for me. Tested on multiple devices.

Suggest you clear your cache and try again. If it still doesn't work, try another web browser. Could be an issue with a plugin/extension.
Hi,

Lush is aware of the issue affecting the mobile site and is in the process of fixing it. Should all be back up and working again soon.

Apologies for any inconvenience.


The 3rd October 2019 is national poetry day in the UK.

Share one of your favourite lines below. smile

To see a World in a Grain of Sand
And a Heaven in a Wild Flower
Hold Infinity in the palm of your hand
And Eternity in an hour.


Auguries of Innocence By William Blake


O, for a draught of vintage! that hath been
Cool'd a long age in the deep-delved earth,
Tasting of Flora and the country green,
Dance, and Provençal song, and sunburnt mirth!


Ode to a Nightingale By John Keats

Day after day, day after day,
We stuck, nor breath nor motion;
As idle as a painted ship
Upon a painted ocean.


The Rime of the Ancient Mariner By Samuel Taylor Coleridge
*you’re



Ooo, I love a good horror story! I’ll have to check these out.