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Nikki703
Over 90 days ago
Bisexual Female, 57
Forum
Active Ink Slinger
The Hot Friend
23% Sexy-Cute, 47% Dark-Light, 48% Artsy-Stylish
Sexy, neither Dark nor Light, and neither Artsy nor Stylish, she's just the Hot Friend. You know you've got one of these. Great face, great uh... assets. This is the type of girl who is fawned on by guys constantly, never realizes it, and finally marries some jackass who's just like you... but damn it, it's not you!
23% Sexy-Cute, 47% Dark-Light, 48% Artsy-Stylish
Sexy, neither Dark nor Light, and neither Artsy nor Stylish, she's just the Hot Friend. You know you've got one of these. Great face, great uh... assets. This is the type of girl who is fawned on by guys constantly, never realizes it, and finally marries some jackass who's just like you... but damn it, it's not you!
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by sprite
ok, honesty time. i love my girl. she stays in shape, she looks good, she's hot. that's not why i love her, but it's part of why i love her and it's her. if that changed... it would mean she's changed. i don't think i'd love her less, but it would bother me, for her sake, knowing she'd be unhappy about it, and for mine. sure, a few extra pounds - notice i said a FEW - wouldn't make me love her any less, but if she put on a lot, if it effected what she could do, what we could do together, how she looked, how she felt about herself? yeah, i'd put my foot down, help her with whatever is going on, and get her back to where we are both happy. she's a beautiful girl, inside and out, and the inside is why i love her, but the outside can be a reflection of what's going on inside, and i am just shallow enough to no want to be with someone who just let's themselves go.
i have always dated good looking men, slept with good looking girls, i am attracted to physical beauty in both sexes. sorry, but that's me. if that makes me shallow, then so be it, i am shallow. doesn't mean i think less of people with those extra pounds - honestly, i feel sympathy for them, and would do anything in my power to help them get themselves back into shape. like i said, i am not talking a few extra pounds, i am talking about people who push the envelope, falling into the obese catagory, or nearing it - it's hard to see past the weight, the health issues, the mindset that lets them get to that state, and it would be frustrating to be with someone who can't do things because of their weight or health or being badly out of shape. plus, it would show they don't care about themselves or their relationship with me.
I agree with what you said about your girl and if she gained weight, it would mean something about her has changed since that isnt who she is now. But ike I said, my sitaution was not about me changing or not respecting my partner or our relationship. It was about him not respecting me and more so, me not respecting myself.
I dont think you are being shallow at all. I too only date or have sex with people I am physically attracted to an that means in very good shape. I work very hard to keep myself in shape and I have endured a lot of shit during my marriage and I think that gives me the right to choose what I like. But I will never not like someone because of their appearance, that woud be shallow. But it does show me they dont repect themselves. And before I get bombarded with "i have a gland disorder", I know that there are people who have no control over it, but that is a very small percentage. Sorry if this makes people hate me!!!
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I have done this a couple of times and really didnt feel good about it. All of the times I did not really know the other person very well. But if I was very friendly with both of the people, I really would prefer to not get involved in it as I would feel like I was betraying one friend for another
Active Ink Slinger
I was in a situation similar but also very different when I was married. After my 3rd child was born, I had trouble losing the weight. My ex, who wasnt the most sexual person to start with really didnt have interest in sex much anymore so I realy had no incentive to try hard to get back in shape. Over the next few years, My marriage deteriorated for reasons I wont go into here and I felt trapped, so I had even less motivation. So before I got pregnant with my 3rd child, I was 115lbs and I was now about 160lbs and didnt really care. I had no self esteem, no desire for sex with my husband, even no desire to masturbate.
Well a chain of events led me to joining a gym as a favor to a friend. After a few months she quit but I was addcited and within a year I was back to 115 and in the best shape of my life. My desire for sex was back and so was my self esteem. I changed how I dressed and loved all the attention (not from my ex) I got when I was out. And 12yrs later, I am still 115lbs!!
So I really gave up on myself. I did feel like I was not married to the same guy who swept me off my feet because he changed, not me. I felt sorry for myself. I blamed myself. So girls (and guys too), no matter how bad things get, remember to be true yourself. Maybe he/she doesnt care what you look like, but you should care. You're worth it!!
Well a chain of events led me to joining a gym as a favor to a friend. After a few months she quit but I was addcited and within a year I was back to 115 and in the best shape of my life. My desire for sex was back and so was my self esteem. I changed how I dressed and loved all the attention (not from my ex) I got when I was out. And 12yrs later, I am still 115lbs!!
So I really gave up on myself. I did feel like I was not married to the same guy who swept me off my feet because he changed, not me. I felt sorry for myself. I blamed myself. So girls (and guys too), no matter how bad things get, remember to be true yourself. Maybe he/she doesnt care what you look like, but you should care. You're worth it!!
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I can only go by places I have been so I guess Id pick La Jolla, CA or Key West, FL in the USA or Amsterdam. I have been to many European countries and all over the US and Canada and they have so much to offer be it weather, night life, open-minded lifestyle, etc. But the more I travel, Im sure my picks may change.
If you could have any job you choose, what would you do?
If you could have any job you choose, what would you do?
