Even though she turned out to be a gold-digging lunatic and emotional-vampire manipulator-person - my ex was into exhibitionism and voyeurism… Naturally, she easily got me into it as well - really fast - and very quickly (WAY too quickly in hindsight) merely watching or showing off was not exciting enough… I started to [and still do] fantasize day and night about pushing myself to find my limits.

Thing is - she fucked it up very quickly by getting too greedy - she wanted to have 100% control over the situation, but then bizarrely acted like it was all my idea and I had 'forced' her into it. Her tactic had a flaw, however, because there was a pretty glaring hole in her accusation - I literally had not even officially agreed to it verbally, offered ideas, or added terms, stipulations - NOTHING... So, needless to say I was VERY confused (and naive).

If she hadn't tried to pull this process off in such a short period of time (a little over a week from the initial discussion - to complaining that the arrangement was just MY way of getting away with cheating on her and that she was getting played), but more importantly if she had used her normal con-artist smooth subtlety and given my brain that just wanted to believe her for the sake avoiding unpleasant conversations. Then I could have given her the benefit of the doubt.

Now, before you go thinking I'm a COMPLETE idiot... I should say her BS was ALWAYS (now this always is REAL in that it was 100% without fail) convincingly aided by the calming sensations of her thirsty worshipping of my cock (not much I won't forgive while receiving a full hour of oral devotion - like, well I mean how bad can anyone be that does this on the daily??) She never phoned those oral sessions in either. Each and every one of them would be the BJ of a lifetime for other guys. This was a frequent occurrence (almost daily for a two year period). Her game would not have lasted long at all without those fantastic blowjobs... and I tried to offer an Olive branch to her trying to work it out - because I wasn't ready to give those CW seshes up just yet...