Join the best erotica focused adult social network now
Login
RumpleForeskin
1 month ago
Straight Male, 78
0 miles · Phoenix
Profile Stories
43
Ebooks Friends
61
Follows
81
Forum
6.7k
Groups
1

Forum
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
What, I say what in the name of Juan Valdez is CTDE coffee? If it turns out to be (shudder) instant coffee, there's gonna be a serious 'Come to the Right Rev' mass meeting to discuss the ramifications of such a heinous crime against culture and coffee.

I've read voted and commented on the entries by Kimmie and DD. The rest of you writers of the storm better bring your 'A' level efert to your own entries.

Anybody want, need and/or crave something to drink?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
NEWS FLASH!!

The Survivor contest over on Stories Space is now closed. There are a total of 17 entries.

I'll drink to that.
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
So I'm sitting at my 'puter while strolling along the great info highway and listening to some Lush porn prose, when there's an impressive, window shaking, clap of thunder. It made me smile as it brought to mind the line from Dylan's 'Desolation Row' that, 'everybody's making love or else expecting rain. But then my smile vanished when I recalled that these days I have only the second half of that phrase covered. (sigh)'

James, I've unearthed another drink from a Kinky Friedman novel. A 'Vodka McGovern is named after a reporter friend of his. Best I recall, it is similar to a G&T except for vodka replacing gin and lime juice being added to the mix. You might want to round up some volunteers and do a bit of research and development on this possible addition to Rumplations' menu. ;)

I'd give one a try now except someone forgot to reorder Verisimilitude Vodka: the vengence of Valdosta after the supply was exhausted by the last Long Island Tea debauch.

Anybody else wanna drink?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings gals and guys and may I be the first to say, TGIF?


Nic stopped in a bit earlier, 'just psssting all over the joint about the new contest. It's not that I'm complaining, you understand, but who is gonna clean up the mess?

Here are a few contest tidbits:
theme: quickie sex
max word limit -- 1000
deadline: August 28

For me, the fun thing is that except for the thousand word max limit, there are no genres.
Head on over to the Site Ann forum for complete details.

Don't believe Da Bear has been back since he stepped out back to check on whether Tawny was skinny-dipping and if so, to offer his assistance. While a gentlemanly gesture, odds are it'll end up with the hot tubs filters clog with fur. (sigh)

Me, I'm gonna try some of that 'nutty' coffee James coaxed Big Bertha into producing. Then I'm gonna grab a few goodies and join Coma and Tose to listen in to their unlearned debate on whether or not a female-type lady-person has, anatomically speaking, a 'yet'. Stay tuned for details.

Now anybody want a drink?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings, Rumplators. For those wondering, Curvy handled the setup this morning when she stopped in for coffee. Sometimes a gal's just gotta do what a gal's gotta do.

Congrats to Annie for three years of authorial excellence on Lush and for putting up with this crowd of rowdy Rumplators for most of that time.


And congrats to Martin for having some time off while sharing space with two fine French females. sounds like some sort of fantastic fantasy. Here's hoping August is good to you and yours. ;)

I'm guessing traffic on Lush and by extension, Rumplations, will continue light until around the end of August. Best I recall, summers are usually slow on the WWW and with last summer being lost to the plague, folks are now doubling up to catch up.

For instance, I'll be visiting grandkids and g-grandkids toward the end of August. Planned on doing this earlier but dem plans had to change.

Me, I'm gonna fill my mug with some of Curvy's classic Irish coffee, grab onto whatever goodies are available and go listen in on Coma and Tose in their discussion of quantum physics and whether it's any better than all other physics you can take.

Anybody need a drink?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
James, I don't care what everybody else around here keeps saying about you, imo, you're okay. ;) Oh yeah, and thanks for the goodies.

Anybody want a drink to go with Da Bear's goodies?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings to all Moanday mourners. One contest done another with a deadline coming up on the 22nd. Just for the record and imo, the entries in the 'Survivor' contest still open over on Stories Space are all good, as in, really, really damn good. Go check 'em out and, odds are you'll agree unless, that is, you are one of the very odd.

Now to fill my mug with some of the Panamanian coffee Da Bear has conned Big Bertha into producing. Then after grabbing a goody or two, I'm heading over to check out the 'Kinky' contest results.

Anybody want a drink before I slip out of here?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
To: those marvelous mods, Scott and Carlton.

My thanks to you both for correcting my faulty linkage. I swear on my beloved Apple IIc operator's manual that I had the full link ready for the mandatory reposting but got distracted and/or scatterbrained and forgot to utilize the poor thing. Just one more proof that posting prior to coffee consumption can be risky.

Now about that wine. I'm afraid the bar is out of that fancy Italian wine Scott and TG rave about. Fortunately there's something of an over-stocked situation when it comes to vintage Ripple wine. So here's a couple bottles for both of you. All four bottles are at stockroom temps so I strongly advise you two chill or, even better, freeze them prior to consumption. ;)

Just finished Kinky Friedman's 'Gog Bless John Wayne' novel where I encountered the recipe for a new rum drink. A double-shot of rum is served over ice with a glass of cold Coke as the sidecar. Think I'll call it 'The Kinkster'. Anyone wanna give it a try?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings to all and a big blessing to Tonya for today's setup, especially those blueberry bearing goodies.

The big news down here in the desert is the forecast is for a high of 'only' 99f. By time for the tip-off of the Suns game with the Bucs, all should have been revealed.

Time for some of Tonya's Jersey golden brew and, of course, one or maybe two of her goodies. Anybody want a drink before I head out to the back porch to do back porch sort of things?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
The excellent list of even more excellent Lush story James posted is a goodness for which Da Bear is more than forgiven for his tardiness this morning. ;)

Let me add one link to an intriguing story by a newbie to Lush.

Dirty Stories by a writer doing business as, HundredPercent.

https://www.lushstories.com/stories/straight-sex/-dirty-stories-.aspx

It's a straight sex, coming-of-age summer romance about a guy with a pregnant girlfriend he plans on marrying and his summer fling with an exotic and most erotic Spanish teenager.

Me, I'm not sure how to describe the style of 100% but it was, for me, an impressive piece of short fiction.

Apparently, the author is shy and has turned off comments. I PM'ed him with a 'Way to go' and an invite to Rumplations. But what I'd really like to know is how others react to his work.

Any feedback either here or by PM, would be appreciated. And now, who wants a drink?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings to all who enter lushting to continue the celebration of the birthday's of famed author Iris Murdoch and the founding matriarch of LUSH, Nicola C.. Due to overwhelming demand, festivities will be extended over the weekend. Misbehave accordingly.

Kept hoping someone at least semi-competent would come in while I was in the midst of that previous ramble and assume the grave responsibility of preparing the set-up. But so far, no luck. (sigh)

Well, let me tell y'all that Big Bertha has been relieved of her bottom settlement sludge (save for caffeine dependent Rumplators) then both she and the tea kettle were rinsed out, filled with water from Fool's Bayou and BB got a a heapin' helpin' of dark roast coffee from New Orleans. Both have responded well to the treatment and are now well and truly turned on.

Once the creative process has been accomplished,I'm gonna fill my mug with Big Bertha's blessed brew, grad a bag or two of heart-healthy fried pork skins and slip out to the back porch to await further developments. Anybody want, need, crave something to drink before I slip away?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Today is the birthday of two leading UK literary lionesses: the incomparable Iris Murdoch and the fabulous Queen bee of the Lush hive, nicola.

IMO, it's a fine excuse for getting a quick start to TGIF and weekend drunken debauchery.

TG has started a Happy Birthday Nic post in the Occasions section of The Pub forum.

Me, I'll drink to all that. Anybody else crave a celebratory drink?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Forgot to respond to Grace's no doubt most solicitous query, and I quote:
hey, bill, when was your last enema?

Grace, at my age enemas for fun have long since vanished while on the medical science front, or rear as the case may be, they've given way to rotor-rooter jobs.

So to answer your question: one helluva long time ago.

BTW, that brings to what passes for my mind these days, the verse from the Bible that admonishes us that: All shall meet God in the end.

Anybody need a refill?

.
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings fellow travelers through the lands of Lush.

NEWS FLASH! utterchaos just published a new story:

https://www.lushstories.com/stories/teen/-no-strings-attached-revealed-truths.aspx

Check it out then come back later to say 'Merci Buckets' for the tip. ;)

Cali, many thanks for the kind offer of coffee or juice. However, this gin joint is infested with a host of tea sippers. For the most part, they are good folks but don't ever get between them and a cup of that tea stuff.

Apple, good morning. How's that Guatamalian coffee James inflicted on and/or in poor Big Bertha?

Think I'll try of mug of the stuff, grab a few goodies and go join Coma and Tose to listen in on their never ending debate on whether or not a woman has a, yet. Anybody want a drink before I immerse myself in that sea of Boondoggle illogic?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
For no particular reason other than maybe because it's the day after the All-Star game and probably the last day without baseball until sometime late in the fall, I felt lead to post this quote from one of the greatest films involving baseball, in like, forever, 'Bull Durham. ;)

Crash Davis (Kevin Costner)
Well, I believe in the soul, the cock, the pussy, the small of a woman's back, the hanging curve ball, high fiber, good scotch, that the novels of Susan Sontag are self-indulgent, overrated crap. I believe Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone. I believe there ought to be a constitutional amendment outlawing Astroturf and the designated hitter. I believe in the sweet spot, soft-core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve and I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days.

Works for me. smile

Anybody want to agree with a drink?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings to all who roam the lusty lands of Lush and this joyous 'Hump Day' and to those who have slipped into Rumplations in hopes of avoiding bill collectors.

First things first, he says, firstily, many thanks to Martin for his suggestion for the extermination of the pestilential 'Grammarly Integrator' tag that is, sad to say, still infesting my 'puter.

Martin has recently had troubles of his own, of course. In his latest post he lamented, and I quote: I got to use one of my favourite words yesterday - discombobulated. Trust me, in an Ines' French accent... it worked for me

His words of despair inspired me to wondering if the vast customer base at Rumplations is ready for a quick challenge to come up with a sorta micor-length story that includes Martin's word-of-the-day, 'discombobulated'.



Just a thought.

Secondly(bet you thought I'd lost track) , 'Hi ya, Curvy!' he says, waving in the wrong direction. (sigh)

So without any further and/or farther ado, I'll fill my mug with some of that Kona coffee Big Bertha is putting out today, grab some beef jerky and head out to the back porch to await the rise of the sun and the arrival of Tawny for her morning skinny-dip in the dumpster hot tub.

Anybody want some of this coffee, which ain't half-bad, or something else to drink before I head outside?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings to the poor but impoverished who approach the bar, seeking cheap drinks and hoping to benefit from the somewhat casual bookkeeping of Da Bear.

Sports tidbit: Two high school players from the stomping grounds of Larry, and Carl,Kansas City, who had been signed by my LSU Tigers, were drafted by their hometown team, the Kansas City Royals in the early rounds of the MLB draft. And while it is true that the school's cheerleaders are perky and and the Golden Girl dancers are most alluring money is money, especially when there's a gob of it available for going pro. Here's hoping they both make it to the majors and have great careers.

Thanks to old Three B (Bear Behind the Bar) for the morning set-up. Gonna grab me a mug of whatever type of coffee he picked, then grab some goodies then slip outside to sit on the back porch and await sunrise and to be available to be of aide to Tawney whenever she takes her morning skinny-dip in the dumpster hot tub.

Anybody want a drink before I make that big move?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Carl,, I'm sure it comes as no surprise that my vote is for the James Brown original classic version.

Some 'covers work, such as the Grand Funk cover of Little Eva's 'Locomotion, the cover of Etta James' 'Hound Dog' by Elvis and the job Whitney Houston did on Dolly Parton's 'I Will Always Love you'. But, imo, this cover of JB's 'Man's World', while interesting, just ain't in that class.

BTW, any chance you can clue me in on the 'Grammarly Integrator' thingy ? On my 'puter, it has suddenly popped up, or down, since it tends to be lurking at the bottom of pages or posts.

BTW #2, I'm now and forever jealous of you for meeting Dr. John backstage way back when. ;)

Anybody want and/or need a drink?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Three questions in search of answers.

What is a 'Grammarly Integrator?
Whhy has it suddenly shown up at the bottom of most Lush pages?
How can I get rid of the thing or learn how it might be utilized?

Clueless old Lusher wants to know.
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Weekend greetings to all who survived the TGIF dance in the parking lot with Carl serving as DJ and James just serving.

Coffee has been properly prepared in due and ancient form along with the tea kettle. Question about the provinance of the coffee and the source of the water should be address to the ever obstinate, Helen Waitt. So if you got questions, go to Hell and Wait.

Meanwhile, good morning, Martin. I'm wondering if you or any other Rumplator oversupplied with IQ can clue me in to what the 'Grammarly Integrator' thingy is that is now showing up at the bottom of and edit page.

Time to fill my mug with whatever Big Bertha produces, grab a bag of fried pork skins and then shag ass out to the back porch to await further developments.

Anybody else need a drink of something or other before I depart?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
A call for Emma to submit, so to speak.

Greetings, y'all. Came across this call for submission and immediately thought of Emma.


Perennial Press: Arthropoda
They want speculative fiction and poetry for an anthology featuring insects, crustaceans, arachnids, or myriapods. They want submissions on monstrous, mythical, or mechanical arthropods. They center narratives of womxn, people of color, and queer folks. They also accept reprints.
Deadline: 7 August 2021

Of course any gutsy Rumplator is free to join in the submission.

Big Bertha has been detoxified of her bottom settlement (sludge that's set aside for the caffeinoholics among us) After a quick rinse, she was gifted with a load of dark roast coffee and water from the Waterproof (La) municipal waste disposal and water works Dept.. The tea kettle is now heating water from that same source. Both should be ready to put out soon.

Two quick sports notes: It's the best of times and the worst of time here in the valley of the sun. The Diamondbacks had there winning streak ended at two thanks to a pounding by the Rockies. Still, for a team with the worst record in all of MLB, coming up with the team's first back-to-back wins in two months is something of an achievement, of sorts.

Meanwhile, the Phoenix Suns are now 2-0 in the best-of-seven NBA finals after beating Milwaukee by ten points.

That's all folks. Me, I'm grabbing a mug of coffee and whatever goodies are available and will then transport my carcus out to the back porch to commune with nature and await Tanya's early morning skinny dip in the dumpster hot tub.

Anybody want a drink before I slide outta here?

:gglasses8:
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Seeker, here's your Tailgater. Don't suppose you were able to film the erotic, if futile, efforts of that spider? Got tea for Kat, coffee for Sarah, and a hard time for James. Enjoy.

Anybody else need a drink?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
After midnight greetings to all who enter seeking comfort, enlightenment and cheap booze.

Tonya has slipped in and begun the long overdue overhaul of Big Bertha and the tea kettle. What's more, she came with homemade goodies. smile

Angel, many thanks for your link to LeAnn Rimes singing 'The Rose' with the Gay Men's chorus of LA. It was/is both impressive and moving and well worth a listen or two.

The Phoenix Suns took game one of the NBA finals, whipping the Milwaukee Bucks 118-105. That is, imo, a major goodness.

It being a long time between now and Tawny taking her sunrise skinny-dip in the dumpster hot tub, I decided Big Bertha was overdue for the full spa treatment. Therefore, her bottom settlement has been removed and saved for the caffeine addicted,she's then been scoured, sandblasted and given a hearty rubdown followed by a thorough wash and rinse. Once she had been dried and polished, a generous supply of medium roast Breakfast Blend coffee from New Orleans was combined with a suitable amount of water from Possum Bayou (a pristine tributary of the mighty Bayou Teche) and then plugged in and turned on, so to speak. The tea kettle has received similar care and is now happily heating up water from that same scenic source.

eta: the contest now has 33 entries with the latest being by Larry,
https://www.lushstories.com/stories/bisexual/-proud-to-be-a-straight-ally-.aspx, a tale of love, lust, and acceptance. Deadline is tomorrow so check it and all the rest out.

Think I'll fill my 'Deep Hole Fluid Injectors' mug with Big Bertha's blessed brew, grab a heapin' helpin' of Tonya's goodies and go sit at the corner table and listen in on Coma and Tose arguing about whether or not a female type lady-person has a, 'yet'. It should be interesting if not informative.

Anybody want something to drink before I go sit-in on the great debate?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings to all randy, rambunktious and even the rowdy Rumplators

It's the middle of the night out here in the desert, just in case you were wondering. Thanks to Carl, Big Bertha coffee and a choice selection of doughnuts are available to help ease the pain.

Late last night, entries in the current contest had reached 29, thereby escaping the infamy of having the fewest entries of any Lush contest.

A mug filled with Big Bertha's coffee in one hand and a few doughnuts in the other, I'll slither over to the corner table to listen in to the always entertaining snores of Coma and Tose.

Anybody need a drink?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings to all and a special good morning to our Special K for her new exhibition of free market capitalism and naked female body parts.
It strikes me, in a non-vilent sort of way, that she picked the perfect day for her grand opening since this is the 75th birthday of the bikini. Here's looking at you, ladies.

Time to fill my mug with Big Bertha's blessed brew, grab some goodies and tramsport my carcus out to the back porch to await the dawn of a new day and Tawny's early morning skinny dip in the dumpster hot tub.

Anybody need a drink before I pull a 'Hank Snow' and start 'Moving On'?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Martin, if Veronique is the daughter of Ines, odds are she'll not only lower the average age in your place but vastly increase the average IQ. ;)

Greetings to all the poor, wretched degenerates from around the world who now huddle in Rumplations seeking companionship and cheap booze.

Big Bertha is up and running as is the Tea Kettle. Coffee beans came from someone named Valdez while the water came from Moon River. Enjoy.

Now pardon me while I fill my mug and grab some goodies then head out back to lend a hand plus a few fingers, to Tanya when she goes skinny-dipping in the the dumpster hottub.

Anybody want a drink?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Damn, DD. (shakes head)

you must be oozing pure testosterone. I mean to say, FIVE (5) (V) booty shakes from Kimmi. You better haul ass for the safety of home and the solace no doubt available in your well used marriage bed. Otherwise what's left of your virtue might not last the night. ;)
So, you want a drink? Maybe in a go cup? Anybody else need a drink or two?

;) )
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings to all who celebrate some or all of the following:

*Canada Day

*The Mississippi State baseball team winning the school's first-ever national championship in any sport by whipping the defending national champ, Vanderbilt, 9-0. Way to go, Dawgs.

*Chris Paul leading the Phoenix Suns to the finals of NBA championship . For 15-year vet 'CP3' it's the first-time the super-star has made it to the finals.

Lots of good music being posted this morning which is a great reason to celebrate. BTW, once upon a time, there was a photo of a classic Wurlitzer 'bubbles' jukebox that showed up sometimes.

No doubt there are other fine reasons to celebrate. Name 'em and claim 'em, Rumplators.

Michelle, thanks for the setup and to Angel for the goodies.

Gonna fill my mug with Bigg Bertha's goodness, grab a few goodies and listen in to Coma and Tose discussing Octam's Razor and whether it's still the best for daily shaving.

Anybody want a drink?

,
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings to all and big HUGS to those who need a few.

Just dropped in to to guilt trip all who have not yet gotten around to finishing their contest entry. As of a few minutes ago, there were 15 entries. The deadline for entering the contest is July 8. Last time I checked that was just over a week from now. (hint - hint)

In sports, England defeated Germany which, I'm told, hasn't happened since 1945 or thereabouts. ;)

Over here, the NBA semi-finals will in in a a few days. Odds are two longshots, will make the finals, The Phoenix Suns and Atlanta Hawks.

Tonight, the college baseball national championship will be decided when Vanderbilt faces Mississippi State. I'll be pulling for MSU because the Bulldogs are one of only three major colleges to never, ever won any sort of a national title. Sic 'em, Dawgs.

That's all the sports worth mentioning. Having spread light and info among the Rumplations multitude, I'll fill my mug with Big Bertha's goodness, grab a goody or two and join Coma and Tose for their discussion of how can there be a String Theory with no strings attached?

Anybody want a drink?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Rumplators, this is just plain ridiculous. According to one of thos new-fangled Amazon Echo 'Alexa' machines, a few minutes ago the temp in Portland, OR was 112f. Meanwhile out here in the desert, in the 'Valley of the Sun' the temp was only 106f. BTW, the sultry, Steaming, sweltering ,siren of Seattle, that would be our, Sprite, is enjoying temps of just over 100f.

Seeker, think I'll join you in chugging down a tall, cold 'Tailgater'. Anybody else want a drink?
View Post