Awaiting her spanking
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Sensei
1 day ago
Straight Male, 58
0 miles · California
Forum
Active Ink Slinger
Strictly speaking, I'm not *sure* that's panty hose and not stockings. But, strictly speaking, I've got the same question about this picture too, so I'll go with it anyway.
What I'm looking for is hard to describe, as I am not sure what the term for it is, if there is one.
I want that one-knee-in-front-of-the-other "modesty" pose of the legs. Know what I mean?
What I'm looking for is hard to describe, as I am not sure what the term for it is, if there is one.
I want that one-knee-in-front-of-the-other "modesty" pose of the legs. Know what I mean?
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by overmykneenow
What is deemed as safe and sane is subjective. Unfortunately it seems that consensual also falls into that category for some people. Some people think that a woman wearing a short skirt is consent.
Those people are either criminals or insane.
I don't really want to argue the consent portion. Quite frankly, it's the easiest part when you're dealing with reasonable people (which is the only way one should play). You establish that consent exists at the outset and establish a mechanism (safe word or gesture) by which it can be withdrawn at any time. That's just a given. It's no different for RACK or SSC. Anyone who doesn't do that is doing it wrong.
Dismemberment isn't an interesting point for me, because it's one of the things that for me is a hard limit - I'd never consent to it (and I'm talking about giving OR receiving). And consent from all parties is a requirement.
Active Ink Slinger
I guess I have a different perspective on RACK versus SSC.
Both have "Consensual" in it. I believe that true, informed, withdraw-able consent is the ONLY thing that separates BDSM from abuse. I'm not going to say more than that - I believe it's as black-and-white as it gets. Either everyone consents, or it's a felony.
The difference between the two is the emphasis on safety.
Mike Rowe, I believe, said it most succinctly on Dirty Jobs (though he was speaking of employment rather than kink). SSC, I believe, is like saying "Safety First." In Mike Rowe's narrative, "Safety First" was a useless mantra. Clearly safety is never first on a job site where safety is a concern, because the safest course is to simply not do the work. Mike's replacement mantra was "Safety Third." For him, doing the job came first, making entertaining television was number two, and safety was number three.
That, I believe, is the essence of RACK. It is deciding that what you (and that includes EVERYONE INVOLVED) want to do is to put pleasure ahead of safety in the priority list. Not that it means doing things with a disregard to safety, but with the idea that you're not going to let a concern for safety get in the way of kink.
To paraphrase Mike, "Safety, while always in the top 5, is never first."
Both have "Consensual" in it. I believe that true, informed, withdraw-able consent is the ONLY thing that separates BDSM from abuse. I'm not going to say more than that - I believe it's as black-and-white as it gets. Either everyone consents, or it's a felony.
The difference between the two is the emphasis on safety.
Mike Rowe, I believe, said it most succinctly on Dirty Jobs (though he was speaking of employment rather than kink). SSC, I believe, is like saying "Safety First." In Mike Rowe's narrative, "Safety First" was a useless mantra. Clearly safety is never first on a job site where safety is a concern, because the safest course is to simply not do the work. Mike's replacement mantra was "Safety Third." For him, doing the job came first, making entertaining television was number two, and safety was number three.
That, I believe, is the essence of RACK. It is deciding that what you (and that includes EVERYONE INVOLVED) want to do is to put pleasure ahead of safety in the priority list. Not that it means doing things with a disregard to safety, but with the idea that you're not going to let a concern for safety get in the way of kink.
To paraphrase Mike, "Safety, while always in the top 5, is never first."
Active Ink Slinger
Everybody is different, but I would expect most people to squeeze the ball tighter rather than drop it.
And the "slapping" is fairly distinctive, so long as it is positionally possible.
And the noise is intended to be three sharp exclamations followed by silence. That too is fairly distinctive.
But those aren't universal. Just ideas of what have worked for others. You'll need to adapt one for your situation, or else try something different or perhaps not use gags.
And the "slapping" is fairly distinctive, so long as it is positionally possible.
And the noise is intended to be three sharp exclamations followed by silence. That too is fairly distinctive.
But those aren't universal. Just ideas of what have worked for others. You'll need to adapt one for your situation, or else try something different or perhaps not use gags.
Active Ink Slinger
I think every time someone posts "Does anyone find X sexy?" they're trying to validate their own desires.
The answer is always "yes." We are all different human beings, but none of us is so unique that what turns our crank is a one-in-6-billion thing.
I encourage anyone who is looking for a community around a particular fetish to search on FL (PM me if you don't recognize the website I'm talking about. They don't like us to post links here).
Cuckolding doesn't *imply* that the man is a sissy. I can envision cuckolding fantasies that involve sort of a "home invasion" role-play. The "unicorn" "breaks in" to a couple's house, ties up the man and forces him to watch as he "rapes" his wife. Again, not my cup of tea, but I can see how that might be attractive.
The answer is always "yes." We are all different human beings, but none of us is so unique that what turns our crank is a one-in-6-billion thing.
I encourage anyone who is looking for a community around a particular fetish to search on FL (PM me if you don't recognize the website I'm talking about. They don't like us to post links here).
Cuckolding doesn't *imply* that the man is a sissy. I can envision cuckolding fantasies that involve sort of a "home invasion" role-play. The "unicorn" "breaks in" to a couple's house, ties up the man and forces him to watch as he "rapes" his wife. Again, not my cup of tea, but I can see how that might be attractive.
Active Ink Slinger
Put a spongy ball in her hand. If it falls out (that is, if she lets it go or drops it), then that's your safe-word.
Other possibilities are if you have her hands restrained near a flat surface, and if she has enough play in her restraints, then she could slap the surface as a signal.
Another good one for gags is "Mmf! Mmf! Mmf!" That is, making three short noises through the gag right in a row, as a sort of "morse code" of a sort.
Other possibilities are if you have her hands restrained near a flat surface, and if she has enough play in her restraints, then she could slap the surface as a signal.
Another good one for gags is "Mmf! Mmf! Mmf!" That is, making three short noises through the gag right in a row, as a sort of "morse code" of a sort.
Active Ink Slinger
I will say again - it sounds to me like her original posting suggested that anything involving pain was at the very least a soft limit for this fellow. Given that, I'd like to reiterate that sadism and masochism are parts of BDSM, but they are not a requirement of D/s (which is also part of BDSM). There are all sorts of power exchange games that can be played even if you take pain completely off the table.
I suggested bondage and edging (orgasm control). I'd like to challenge folks to expand on that and suggest other power exchanges that do not involve outright pain.
I suggested bondage and edging (orgasm control). I'd like to challenge folks to expand on that and suggest other power exchanges that do not involve outright pain.
Active Ink Slinger
It sounds to me like bondage is probably the most apropos way for you to express your dominance.
I'm a dominant heterosexual male, so this is a bit of a mental stretch for me, but I suggest you try to tie him up and try to control his orgasm. Stimulate him, but order him not to come and keep him on the edge of an orgasm without letting him actually get there for as long as you can. Or get him close, then make him please you before you let him come.
You don't have to play pain games with him to dominate him. And if you can immobilize him, then his physical superiority will be a moot point. And as for confidence, if you are his mistress, then he should (MUST!) do as he's told.
One caution... you mentioned handcuffs. The kind the cops use are actually really bad for BDSM. They are narrow, unyielding (in the sense that they do not conform well to the shape of the limb to which they are attached), and they can spontaneously tighten. You would do much better to get cuffs intended for BDSM. They tend to be leather, wide, and their inner circumference remains fixed when they're locked.
The only exception is when doing police related role playing. Then, authenticity is key, but other than that, they're not good toys.
I'm a dominant heterosexual male, so this is a bit of a mental stretch for me, but I suggest you try to tie him up and try to control his orgasm. Stimulate him, but order him not to come and keep him on the edge of an orgasm without letting him actually get there for as long as you can. Or get him close, then make him please you before you let him come.
You don't have to play pain games with him to dominate him. And if you can immobilize him, then his physical superiority will be a moot point. And as for confidence, if you are his mistress, then he should (MUST!) do as he's told.
One caution... you mentioned handcuffs. The kind the cops use are actually really bad for BDSM. They are narrow, unyielding (in the sense that they do not conform well to the shape of the limb to which they are attached), and they can spontaneously tighten. You would do much better to get cuffs intended for BDSM. They tend to be leather, wide, and their inner circumference remains fixed when they're locked.
The only exception is when doing police related role playing. Then, authenticity is key, but other than that, they're not good toys.
