SereneProdigy's Forum Posts

4 Apr 2018

Christina Halkiopoulos definitely [s]makes me kind of hard[/s] is my kind of hard:

4 Apr 2018

Quote by Dani
Dude, it baffles me how many people don't get this.

I was at the bar with my best friend the other night (not the best friend I mentioned in a different thread, but someone else), and I asked the bartender to make me a Jack and Coke, but with Makers instead. And he was like, "Oh, so you want a Makers and Coke?" And I was like, "No, I want a Jack and Coke, but with Makers." This motherfucker had the audacity to look at me like I had grown a second head or something. I was stunned to say the least, so I said to hell with the Jack and Coke.

I ended up getting a White Russian, but with Coke instead of cream. And Jack Daniels in place of Kahlúa and vodka.

The incompetence of some people never ceases to amaze me.

I can't speak for you guys in the US, but the hilarious thing is that calling a 'Makers and Coke' in a bar here in Montreal would actually lead to much more confusion than that (and I'm suspecting the exact same for just about every country that isn't swimming in bourbon like yours). A bottle of Maker's Mark costs $50 around here; it's totally up there with Grey Goose as a top-shelf bottle. If you consider that bars establish their prices with a 500% markup (which all of them do), you'd be quite literally pouring your drink from a $250 bottle.

Now consider that many bourbon connoisseurs (which most bartenders are) even find diluting a high-quality bourbon with sugar and a tiny splash of a water in an Old Fashioned to be an outright profanity, and you can only imagine their reaction when you'll be asking them to dilute a top-shelf bourbon in cheap Coca-Cola. Let me remind you that Liz who is still allegedly a bourbon newbie went through the trouble of buying herself whiskey stones to make goddamn sure that even melting ice wouldn't taint her precious Maker's Mark.

So a bartender in Montreal (or elsewhere) being asked a 'Makers and Coke' is just going to wonder what the fuck you want exactly. You're asking him to grab one of his top-shelf bottles, surely you want to appreciate it fully and not completely dilute it in the cheapest mixer imaginable in a tall Collins glass, right? So you probably want your Maker's Mark with just a tiny splash of Coke in an Old Fashioned glass, correct? And in the situation where you truly want a highball, why exactly call a drink that's twice as expensive as a good old $10 Jack and Coke when your bourbon is going to be so much diluted that even experts couldn't tell the goddamn difference? At which point, yeah, plenty of bartenders around the world would totally have a much easier time getting your drift if you just referred to a well-established Jack and Coke with a different type of whiskey. They'll still be completely obliviously to your weird rationale, but at least they'll know how to proceed.

Here's the list of famed whiskey cocktails as presented by Wikipedia. Thousands of whiskeys around the world (including bourbon, rye, Scotch, Irish, blended) and dozens of possible mixers, and Jack and Coke is absolutely there among these few limited prestigious drinks. Where in hell is your Makers and Coke exactly? Where is even your extremely generic Whiskey and Coke, or Bourbon and Coke?

The reality is that 'Makers and Coke' isn't an established drink with a fixed recipe any more than 'Gin and Milk' is; it's just two random ingredients put together. Hilariously enough, Google only returns 40,000 results for 'Makers and Coke', while 'Gin and Milk' returns 180,000 results. And 'Jack and Coke' actually returns twice as many results in Google than the extremely inclusive 'Whiskey and Coke' does.

So allow me to reiterate: Jack and Coke isn't just the name of two random ingredients put together like Makers and Coke or any other silly drink is; it's the name of a goddamn cocktail that has well over a hundred years of history (1907) and that's insanely popular all around the world. Jack Daniel's is by fucking far the best-selling whiskey in history, while Coca-Cola is by fucking far the best-selling soft drink, and they're both pillars of southern American culture with extremely similar success stories that date back to the exact same era (circa 1880). That's the whole charm of the Jack and Coke, that sort of trashy old-fashioned spirit that still holds its ground admirably well among all these other posh drinks. Not only that, but it just so happens that the particular sweetness of Jack Daniel's harmonizes with Coca-Cola better than 95% of other whiskeys out there, even better than most top-shelf whiskeys in the $50-100 range. Even the name 'Jack and Coke' has an extremely catchy sound to it and their respective vintage logos look badass as fuck when shown together:

For all these reasons Jack and Coke will always remain a classic benchmark cocktail and the absolute epitome of 'Whiskey and Coke', just like Kleenex® is to kleenexes or Speedo® is to speedos. And likewise, a Beam and Coke will always remain a poor man's Jack and Coke, while a Makers and Coke will always remain an extravagant man's Jack and Coke. You and Felix getting all finicky when I mention my own standards when I'm mixing myself a Jack and Coke is just as retarded as telling someone that his 'Rum and Diet Pepsi' isn't quite the same as the famous 'Rum and Coke'; it's just so goddamn face-palm inducing.

Felix deliberately played the imbecile to feed a grudge that's a few days old; you managed to outdo him by buying right into his imbecility to feed a grudge that's nearly a year old.

So fucking brilliant, I think I'll be drinking to that. 3601