What is where I am looking down from at Adele's boobs?
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Simonize
Over 90 days ago
Straight Male, 58
0 miles · Washington
Forum
Active Ink Slinger
A business man hits the bar on the 42nd floor of a building in New York City.
The bar is pretty dead just the bartender and a guy at the end of the bar looking quite drunk.
"Drink," The guy says. "Rum and coke please." The bartender makes the drink and goes back to wiping the glasses.
The guy at the end of the bar looks over smiles and moves down.
"Hey buddy want to hear a secret?"
The business man is a good mood says, "Sure."
The drunk guy goes, " Did you know that here in New York they have a phenomenom only here and nowhere else in the world."
"Oh really what's that?" the business man asks.
The drunk guy continues, "See because of all the buildings here and I mean tall buildings there is a massive updraft and if you jump out the window you fall about 20-25 floors and then the updraft catches you and brings you back into the window you jumped out of."
"No freaking way dude you need to lay off the sauce." The business man replies.
"I am 100% serious I will show you." says the drunk. He walks over to the window opens it up looks back waves and jumps.
The business man is astonished and scared and runs over to the window to see the drunk guy falling and then miraculously he starts floating back up and comes right back into the window.
"SEE I TOLD YOU!!" the drunk says.
The Business man is not convinced and says do it again this time he watches the whole thing all the way down and all the way up.
"Believe me now? The drunk asks.
"I do" He says slams down his drink and head over to the window and jumps falling straight to the pavement and splattering all over the ground.
The bartender looks up and says, "Superman you are one mean drunk."
The bar is pretty dead just the bartender and a guy at the end of the bar looking quite drunk.
"Drink," The guy says. "Rum and coke please." The bartender makes the drink and goes back to wiping the glasses.
The guy at the end of the bar looks over smiles and moves down.
"Hey buddy want to hear a secret?"
The business man is a good mood says, "Sure."
The drunk guy goes, " Did you know that here in New York they have a phenomenom only here and nowhere else in the world."
"Oh really what's that?" the business man asks.
The drunk guy continues, "See because of all the buildings here and I mean tall buildings there is a massive updraft and if you jump out the window you fall about 20-25 floors and then the updraft catches you and brings you back into the window you jumped out of."
"No freaking way dude you need to lay off the sauce." The business man replies.
"I am 100% serious I will show you." says the drunk. He walks over to the window opens it up looks back waves and jumps.
The business man is astonished and scared and runs over to the window to see the drunk guy falling and then miraculously he starts floating back up and comes right back into the window.
"SEE I TOLD YOU!!" the drunk says.
The Business man is not convinced and says do it again this time he watches the whole thing all the way down and all the way up.
"Believe me now? The drunk asks.
"I do" He says slams down his drink and head over to the window and jumps falling straight to the pavement and splattering all over the ground.
The bartender looks up and says, "Superman you are one mean drunk."
Active Ink Slinger
Two nuns are sneaking back into the convent after a night of drinking, They are making their way up the back wall climbing trees and using the gutters to sneak back inside. One nun looks at the other Dang I feel like a marine!!
The other nun says yeah me too but where are we going to find one at 3 am.
The mother superior calls all the nuns into the sanctuary.
"Ladies we have a most dire issue to discuss. There was a man in the convent last night."
All the nuns raise there hands to their mouths and go "Ohhhhhhh no." except for a cute nun in the back she just giggles.
The mother superior continues. "He clearly snuck in and visited someones room."
All the nuns raise there hands to their mouths and go "Ohhhhhhh no." except for a cute nun in the back she just giggles.
The mother goes on, "He had sex with someone in this CONVENT!!"
All the nuns raise there hands to their mouths and go "Ohhhhhhh no." except for a cute nun in the back she just giggles.
"We know this because we found the condom!!"
All the nuns raise there hands to their mouths and go "Ohhhhhhh no." except for a cute nun in the back she just giggles.
"Now the bad news, The condom had a hole in it."
All the nuns raise there hands to their mouths and giggle." except for a cute nun in the back she just go, "Oh NOOOOOOOO!"
The other nun says yeah me too but where are we going to find one at 3 am.
The mother superior calls all the nuns into the sanctuary.
"Ladies we have a most dire issue to discuss. There was a man in the convent last night."
All the nuns raise there hands to their mouths and go "Ohhhhhhh no." except for a cute nun in the back she just giggles.
The mother superior continues. "He clearly snuck in and visited someones room."
All the nuns raise there hands to their mouths and go "Ohhhhhhh no." except for a cute nun in the back she just giggles.
The mother goes on, "He had sex with someone in this CONVENT!!"
All the nuns raise there hands to their mouths and go "Ohhhhhhh no." except for a cute nun in the back she just giggles.
"We know this because we found the condom!!"
All the nuns raise there hands to their mouths and go "Ohhhhhhh no." except for a cute nun in the back she just giggles.
"Now the bad news, The condom had a hole in it."
All the nuns raise there hands to their mouths and giggle." except for a cute nun in the back she just go, "Oh NOOOOOOOO!"
