“Hi honey, I'm home,” I called... Facetiously? Sardonically? Yeah, one of those. I had entered our home by the back door into the kitchen. This door is always unlocked to allow easy entry for our neighbors across the road, Sue and Jake. Jake is my best friend, and Sue is my wife Melanie's best friend. Sue is also my mistress, and Melanie is Jake's mistress, so ready access is good for all. Moving on... “Oh, hi honey-buns,...