I was a mess, sat in front of the toilet bowl, dry retchingby now, a mucus, dry tear stained mess.

It had been like a dream, worse an out of body experience but one I had driven myself to do.

It had started with that bloody article in the magazine, “a third of all heterosexual women have lesbian fantasies” went the tag line and me with my second glass of wine and too much time on my hands couldn’t believe such stupidity.

But while reading the article I started to interpose myself in the quotes and comments to dismiss the theory, as far as I was concerned straight is straight.

The author went into detail how she arrived at the conclusions in her article and made some pretty bold statements including “all women are turned on by watching lesbian porn”, “where did she get off on lumping me in with her stupid theories” I shouted.

“Right” I thought I’ll disprove this one straight away, I’ll open up the laptop and search for some lesbian porn”. Which wasn’t hard to find as the Author “Suzie” had conveniently talked about her favourite on line porn site.

Settling down with my now fourth glass I downloaded a film and made myself comfortable.

What struck me first was the lack of tacky music and fake fucking, the two women in the film were stunning, the quality of set and production amazing and these two were really into each other. I was so closely watching the overall film not consciously watching the two girls that it came as a shock to realise I was starting to react to the action, I was heating up down below with that familiar warmth and if I wasn’t mistaken wetness, “no not the case at all its just the wine and the fact that I haven’t had sex for, oh forever, and I’m not at all wet, just warm”! That’s what living alone does to you, always talking to yourself.

But I wasn’t mistaken was I, and slipping my hand down inside my panties I found that I wasn’t just wet I was soaking and when I pulled out may hand I grazed my clit and nearly came there and then.

“Bloody Bitch”, I mumbled “what does she know”. Disgusted in myself I shut the laptop down and stuck on a film.

The problem was I was aching down below for that orgasm I’d nearly had but the ache was strongly tempered with disgust at how the ache had come about. “Fucking hell” I shouted “I do not get turned on watching lesbians have sex”! But then a worse thought leapt straight to the front of my mind “O fucking hell am I a lesbian and never knew”?

I couldn’t be, cock was my favourite food I loved a bloody good fucking, Jesus why was I even having to question myself on this Men were my thing!

And with this I decided to throw it all to the wind and finger myself off with the thought of a juicy fat cock in my mind.

As my fingers slowly worked their magic in me my thoughts turned to the film of the two girls together and as hard as I tried I couldn’t get the thought of them to the back of my mind and it was pointless any way as the minute the vision of the brunette in the film having an almighty orgasm flitted into play I came, came hard, really hard. It was just the split second vision of me laying there instead of her with the blonde between my legs licking MY clit, and bang I came hard and straight away hard again.

Momentarily stunned I then just jumped up and ran, well nowhere just ran a stupid skipping step panicked looking around then sat back down, “Oh fucking bloody hell”.

Then I threw up, red wine everywhere, things went from bad to worse but it at least gave me something to take my mind off of what had just happened!

A while later in bed exhausted but unable to sleep I hunted down the bloody article again in the hope that it would provide me with an excuse to my behaviour. In a way it did the article went on to talk with a number of interviewees who openly admitted being turned on by lesbian porn but who were equally honest in their reflection that they didn’t remotely want sex with another woman and were happy with their sexuality, “Thank God” I breathed, “That’s me”, relieved I settled down to finishing the article and more determined to find evidence to take away my worries.

I should have stopped reading because there were so many conflicting interviews, one woman especially recounting her first lesbian experience with an escort she praised to heaven, even posting a link to her web site, cheek!

It was after reading this interview though that I realised again that the experience she recalled had made me aroused all over again, I felt myself and even though I had showered and dried form my disaster downstairs I was wet through and clearly aroused.

Panic ripped through me, I had sorted this, I was one of the women who didn’t want, this was all wrong! But the by now familiar arousal mixed with disgust was making me sick to the core.

It was then I did something really stupid.

Grabbing the article again I set of and retrieved my laptop. “I’m going to put this genie to bed once and for all” I told myself.

When the web page for the escort opened up I was surprised how classy the site was, almost a mirror of the porn site the lovely “Suzie” had referred to, but then again why should I be surprised.

What was more surprising was the escort, she was really sexy, stunning in fact, so I rang the contact number arranged to go to her place there and then, insisted, “it was only 10 after all”, laughing she said “come on over but to bring 250 dollars”.

I was pumped up, I was going to face the “enemy” and prove that I wasn’t a lesbian.

I arrived and in truth I didn’t know who I was angrier with, me for going or her for being a lesbian escort. When she opened the door I almost marched in and thrust the 250dollars in her hand.

Smiling in a slightly enigmatic way she placed the money on the side table and asked “do you want some wine?” Disarmed slightly I stared blankly back at her and she said “I’ll get a bottle”

I was a mess inside it was like being up in front of the principle I was ready for bolting when she returned with the wine, two glasses and set them down next to the 250 dollars, then without stooping she just stood in front of me and kissed me gently at first but followed shortly with more passion and I came, came there and then from a kiss, came! “My she said you must have been waiting for that”

“I ... I.. oh fuck I don’t know I...” I tried to speak but I was an even bigger mess. One kiss, my pussy was soaking my clit was on fire, my nipples were so hard the pain was incredible.

I felt my dress slipping down and looked at the escort as she slowly kneeled in front of me pulling down my panties. I stepped out of them and almost collapsed when she took my clit straight in her mouth. I took hold of her head more to stop me from falling as she slowly devoured me. I was lost, all I could think about was how disgusted I was, here I was with this lesbian licking, feasting on my pussy and I couldn’t stop her, couldn’t stop the orgasm that was building, no not building HERE! “Oooooooo fuuuuuuuccckkkkkkk” I screamed and this time did kind of collapse, more knelt fell slid, until I was on the floor, the spasms of my orgasm wracking through me.

“Wow “said the escort, “Well you know I’m Claire, you are?” “I’m disgusted with myself” I cried “Disgusted” “Well” laughed Claire “Then that’s what we’ll call you”

“Oh God please don’t make fun of me I am truly disgusted, I only came here to prove to myself that I’m not a lesbian and you, you bitch make me come so hard” Claire laughed again “Well a bitch is a bit strong don’t you think?” Oh God again now I had been rude, insulted her when it was all my fault, the tears were running down my face and she leant over me and slowly licked them off, a truly erotic experience which ended up with me searching out her mouth and kissing her, not her kissing me, me kissing her !

“Do you want me to fuck you Miss Disgusted?” she asked, “do you want me to tease you here?” she said as she gently stroked my now aching and ready again pussy.

“Oh Christ no I don’t “ I said but couldn’t stop her I was being honest, I didn’t want her touching me but my labia, my clit, my nipples, my everything was begging for to be touched. “Do you want to touch me?” she asked

“Fucking hell no” I shouted but when she placed my fingers on her pussy I could stop myself from exploring her folds seeking out her clit I was lost.

She worked her way down to my pussy again and began to eat me, positioning her so that I could still play with her, without me really being aware that she was actually working her way to place herself over my face, which she did.

I looked up at her wet and swollen pussy, she didn’t lower herself on me or move she just let me look and continued to eat me.

I noticed a drip forming on her labia clear and sticky and before I knew what was happening I pulled her down and licked the drip not stopping until I had searched out her clit.

There I was being licked, licking this lesbian building to another huge orgasm and she came just before me.

We lay there, her laughing me crying and I jumped up and ran for the bathroom, and threw up, again, and again,

She came in with towels and set the shower running. After a long shower I went back into the room where she sat naked drinking a glass of wine. “Still disgusted” she asked “More so” I shot back, “Why?” she asked.

“Why!” I responded, looking at her for a while not saying anything, “Why, because I’m a lesbian” I said walking over to her and kissing her.