It is 3:17 in the morning.
As the moonlight casts it dim glow thought my window
I reach out to the emptiness beside me.
Craving to touch her warm body.
My ears aching for the sweet sound of her gentle breathing.
and for yet another night, both she and that stranger named sleep are absent.

With a sigh I lift my head from the tear soaked pillow.
As I reach for the long ivory satin gown the one I bought with my mind filled with her
I stop and turn into the closet.
The hidden navy blue trench coat the brass accents still shining beckons me.
And cover myself.

The dark halls and steps seem haunted with dreams of her.
In the kitchen I pickup the bottle of wine.
The one which has not been a temptation but a reminder of my promise.
But this morning I take down one of the pair of cut crystal glasses.
Accompanied by the hollow feeling in my heart and body, I retreat to the star filled night.
As I settle into my chair.
Staring up into the billions of twinkling lights I realize this time is different.
This time my loss is connected to her victory.
This time my pain is a reminder of her joy.
I know that I love her.
I know I always will.
She says she loves me and I believe her.
Not because I want to.
Not because I need to.
But because in my heart I know it's true.

She has changed me when no change was possible.
She has given me hope where none was to be found.
She has made me smile and dream of the possible.
She has brought sunshine to where there was only darkness.
She has made me love again.

But she is on a journey, an adventure.
She will pick her crew.
Some will be old.
And some will be new.
She has found herself. She is free.
Maybe she doesn't know it yet but her life is expanding
In ways unimaginable just months ago.

I worry.
Her appetites have grown.
Will she be wise enough to temper them when she needs too?
But I know she is smart.
Will her new found power go to her head and in her flight will she, like Icarus, fly to high?
But I know she is wise.
Will she forget those that are important to her?
But I know deep down she is too caring.

The stars are fading.
The sun is rising.
The day is dawning.
I rise to meet my fears.

Will she remember me?