If you halved the number of wives I’ve fucked, buddy, I tell you what.

EMPRR

Earthscale Metacognitive Pronatalist Reproduction Regime

Everybody calls it Emperor.

I graduated university in hellish debt and with an economically useless degree.

I had to see my primary care physician to get cleared to start a physically demanding, low-paying job that had nothing to do with my field of study.

My doc told me if I submitted to a cheek swab DNA collection, an allergy test, and a thorough biometrics examination with the newly established Ministry of Women’s Health & Reproduction, I could qualify for free regular check-ups, reduced emergency care costs, and even a lower health insurance premium. I shrugged. “Sounds swell. But I’m not a woman.”

He chuckled and texted me an address. “Go here.”

I did. It was the local MWHR HQ. At the front desk was an impossibly cute receptionist. I stuttered, “I’m here for the uh-um-uh…”

She smiled with a face full of dimples and sparkling eyes. “Are you here for the survey?”

I nodded.

She handed me a touchscreen tablet. “Fill in all the lines, sign, and we’ll get you started.”

There were so many questions and initials that I got to the point that I just began tapping through. I almost thought I was on a prank show, muttering to myself, “What the fuuuck… how many more? If there’s one more page, I swear to… and another page. Of course.”

When it was finally over, I gave it back to the receptionist, and a pretty, leggy, slender blonde nurse appeared. “Follow me.”

Now, the receptionist was cute, but this nurse was unreal. She led me into an examination room, pulled a kit from a cabinet, and, opening it, produced a swab on a stick. “Open wide.”

She poked it into my mouth and, placing two fingers on the outside of my cheek, held it firm against the cotton as she swirled it against the inside of my cheek. Out she pulled it and dropped the sample into a plastic container, which she sealed. “Thank you.”

“So that’s going to tell your lab I’m a pig.” I grinned.

“A pig?” She got busy in the cabinet, looking for whatever it was.

“I had a hot dog croissant for lunch,” I joked.

She completely ignored it and began my allergy test. “It’s 100% safe.”

“Not worried. I have no allergies. But what if I did?” I really wondered if it would be enough to disqualify me for the perks.

“There’s a theory that some allergies serve an evolutionarily advantageous purpose. But that’s beside the point. You’ll only be kicked if there’s some likelihood you’d pass on a debilitating hereditary condition. The MWHR doesn’t want to certify that a specimen is perfect only to then accidentally spread undetected harmful traits across the general public.” She sounded so… well, I guess clinical is the right word. It was a clinic, y’know.

But she was talking about a program I hadn’t heard of. Very few people had heard of this big, crazy thing. “Huh?”

“Undress,” she said.

“Undress?” I was befuddled. “Oh yeah. OK.” I looked around for a hospital gown or something.

She knew it. “We have nothing else for you to wear. We need you nude.”

“Just to be clear, no underwear?” I set to taking off my shirt.

“It all goes in the basket on the counter: underwear, your socks, your necklace.” She stood and watched.

And I’d never undressed while a nurse watched. Normally, they go out and close the door behind them while you get changed. Her eyes scanned me, bouncing down, right, up, down again, left, resting on something, then drifting up. When I bent to drop my briefs, she looked, from about 2 yards away, directly at my genitals. She stared, making some subtle lip and eyebrow movements as if thinking about what she saw. She silently looked me in the eye as if waiting for me to say something, and then continued looking at my completely nude self.

I kinda stood waiting for something to happen, and exactly as I vocalized to say something, “M…”

She interrupted with, “You have a perfect body.”

I’d flexed in the mirror for a little morning go-get-‘em confidence boost sometimes, but I’d never regarded myself as perfect. That was saying too much. Handsome, fit, sure… objectively true. But nobody is perfect, right? I mean… I had hairy toe knuckles and stuff.

“So damned perfect,” she whispered to herself.

“Thanks,” I chirped.

“What do you think of women?” she asked.

“I like a lot of them.” I was honest.

“You’re going to get a lot of them.” Her eyes burned into me.

“Yeah?” I got hard, and her mouth fell open, a fingertip on her lower lip as she watched me inflate.

“Very yeah… stay right here.” And she briskly flitted out of the exam room door. I stood there, just my erection and me, wondering what she might come back with.

She came back with two more smoking nurses. They came in and eyed me up and down just as she had.

“Oh?” One of them bit her knuckle, a busty ginger.

“You didn’t embellish,” said the other, an olive-toned brunette, as she framed her view of me in her hands like a casting director.

I was grinning now, snickering to myself, my abs tensing with my little laughs. “What? Hey?”

The freckled ginger leaned in, her giant chest jugs pouring out of her top, and she gently reached forward, touching her fingertips to my abs. She traced them. “Absolutely edible,” she said.

The slender blonde flanked my left, and the wide-hipped, full-bottomed brunette flanked my right. Their hands moved over my back, inviting themselves down low over my ass mounds, then back up to my lats and down again. One of them gave my ass cheek a tap, causing it to involuntarily flex, and they both giggled.

“Where did you get that ass from, mister?” the brunette asked.

I couldn’t complain about a thing happening, but I was confused. “Ladies, don’t misunderstand. But is this the examination?”

The blonde let out a big laugh in my face and quickly pinched my nipple, sending my hands over myself in tickled defense. “Right! The examination. I almost forgot all about that. Ladies, how did I make it out of nursing school?”

Their faces turned pink with full, white smiles. The redhead answered, “You’re good at getting samples.”

The brunette added, “She gets samples when she doesn’t swallow them.”

“Who cares, as long as we get dibs on the fresh recruits like mister thick thing here,” the redhead cooed.

“Thick?” I wasn’t sure what she meant. Like… was I caked up? I’d rarely seen my butt in a mirror.

She smiled eye-to-eye with me and pulled my dick back to my thigh, let it go, and let it bounce back like a spring doorstopper. “Yeah. Thick.”

I closed my eyes and tried to focus on breathing. My heart was pounding in my chest. I’d never fucked a girl as hot as any of these nurses, and three at once was a dream come true. I might shoot my slime before scoring a single point, though, if I didn’t get my excitement under control.

Suddenly, the door opened, and the trio froze when they saw who it was. She was another nurse, also a babe but older, with a single streak of white tucked behind her ear. She raised an eyebrow at us like a superior come to scold. “Has he been scanned yet?”

“Scanned?” I wondered.

The blonde answered with a pout, “No. Not yet.”

The senior nurse shook her head. “Scans. Always. First. Now.” And she disappeared.

The redhead sighed. The brunette took me by the hand. “That’s not a problem! Come on, let’s get you in the biometrics reader, and we’ll know everything about this amazing body you strut around.”

I stopped at the door, not following them out, and she yanked my hand as if she’d expected me to follow. “I’m not going out there like this! Let me get my clothes on first.”

The redhead rolled her eyes. “You’ll need to be undressed for the laser and infrared and everything anyway.”

“Lady, I’m not letting everybody in this clinic see my exposed privates jiggling and jangling down the hallway and up the elevator and coming around every corner headfirst.” And I stood immovable as a tree with roots in the floor.

The blonde reached right for ’em, yanking a tissue off the desk and holding it over my erection like a thin, white, flapping leaf.

The redhead gave my ass a soft slap, the brunette yanked my hand, and I just… left my clothes behind and followed them out into full view of whoever we might pass. The blonde held my modicum of modesty barely in place, enough to obstruct the view of my manhood.

“Just think of it like you’re in the locker room,” the brunette advised.

“How far is this machine?” I asked.

“It’s in G wing. This is B wing.” She pointed out a window as we passed, toward another tower adjacent to the one we were in.

“What?!” I couldn’t believe it.

She chuckled. “We need to go down to the lobby, and then across the West-East corridor, and then…”

“I have to walk that far like this?!” I almost turned back to get my clothes, but then… three nurses forfeited? I might never get this chance again. I lowered my gaze, not to make eye contact, as they shuffled me into a packed elevator!