"Quick, someone get their mouth over my cock. I'm going to shoot," he shouted.

A mass of bodies rushed forward, including the father, the son and the holy ghost. A mouth would have reached it in time, avoiding disaster, but the holy ghost clawed them back to try and get there first.

Spunk shot out into the void. Emptiness was filled. A great flash of light accompanied the event as shot after shot erupted and expanded.

And that my friends, is how the universe really came into existence.

And only recently, scientists have found evidence of the fundamental spunk particle.