Hello Ladies,
I haven't seen this question here (and I've already been through 10 pages), but how many of you are curious / definitely interested / into the BDSM realm? I normally hang out on that forum but I have seen a few of you express an interest and I was just wondering how many of you are interested but maybe a little hesitant for whatever reason to wander over to The Dark Side?
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BDSM anyone?
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Active Ink Slinger
I have a huge interest in dominance/submission scenarios and very readily identify as a submissive, both in the fantasies I explore and how I actually behave in the bedroom. But the BDSM "scene" itself is a huge turn off. There's a fetishizing of terminology, protocol, and gear to the point that all the passion has been sapped out in favor of rule books and catalogs. Beyond that, the community seems somewhat rigid in its definitions of how things should be and my own kinks never line up. I'm happier just exploring my deviance with the guy I'm with.
Active Ink Slinger
Let's spend the day in the life of a girl on Lush...
(Since you're relatively new here, I'll go easy on you)
I log on and I'm immediately inundated with 12 black boxes, 9 PM's, 12 friend requests and 4 chat requests (if I forget to set myself to "away"). Since I turned off "poking" I no longer have to deal with them.
These are from your average run-of-the-mill Lush perv and quite a few of them pervs I call friends. I'm used to it and ignore the ones I don't know or don't want to know.
I answer the black boxes, if I have the time, and write off a quick note here and there to friends.
THEN I check the forums.
I may answer the odd question or feel like posting a picture or I might just sit back and read and giggle over the responses.
At first, I liked to check out the BDSM section of the forum since it used to be a part of my lifestyle.
But after I received the 100th totally uncalled for and disgusting PM from some wannabe Dom, that thinks I would make an awesome slave in his harem, I kinda gave up.
Or if I wanted to be lectured on how I'm not doing it "right" I'd go back to college. Or how I'm a "fake" or "weekend" BDSMer, I might tolerate it and still be a part of the BDSM forum.
But since I really don't care to be lectured or called names or "interviewed" by prospective Dom's, I now ignore that section.
The holier-than-thou attitude of a few BDSMer's just left a bad taste in my mouth.
(Since you're relatively new here, I'll go easy on you)
I log on and I'm immediately inundated with 12 black boxes, 9 PM's, 12 friend requests and 4 chat requests (if I forget to set myself to "away"). Since I turned off "poking" I no longer have to deal with them.
These are from your average run-of-the-mill Lush perv and quite a few of them pervs I call friends. I'm used to it and ignore the ones I don't know or don't want to know.
I answer the black boxes, if I have the time, and write off a quick note here and there to friends.
THEN I check the forums.
I may answer the odd question or feel like posting a picture or I might just sit back and read and giggle over the responses.
At first, I liked to check out the BDSM section of the forum since it used to be a part of my lifestyle.
But after I received the 100th totally uncalled for and disgusting PM from some wannabe Dom, that thinks I would make an awesome slave in his harem, I kinda gave up.
Or if I wanted to be lectured on how I'm not doing it "right" I'd go back to college. Or how I'm a "fake" or "weekend" BDSMer, I might tolerate it and still be a part of the BDSM forum.
But since I really don't care to be lectured or called names or "interviewed" by prospective Dom's, I now ignore that section.
The holier-than-thou attitude of a few BDSMer's just left a bad taste in my mouth.
I will agree that in many cases you are right, positivetension. However BDSM like so many other things sexual and nonsexual is a personal taste issue. Don't be "turned off" by the BDSM scene. Just do the parts of it you and your man like and leave the rest to others who enjoy that. There's plenty of twists and turns in BDSM to make everyone happy.
Quote by TheDevilsWeakness
Let's spend the day in the life of a girl on Lush...
(Since you're relatively new here, I'll go easy on you)
I log on and I'm immediately inundated with 12 black boxes, 9 PM's, 12 friend requests and 4 chat requests (if I forget to set myself to "away"). Since I turned off "poking" I no longer have to deal with them.
These are from your average run-of-the-mill Lush perv and quite a few of them pervs I call friends. I'm used to it and ignore the ones I don't know or don't want to know.
I answer the black boxes, if I have the time, and write off a quick note here and there to friends.
THEN I check the forums.
I may answer the odd question or feel like posting a picture or I might just sit back and read and giggle over the responses.
At first, I liked to check out the BDSM section of the forum since it used to be a part of my lifestyle.
But after I received the 100th totally uncalled for and disgusting PM from some wannabe Dom, that thinks I would make an awesome slave in his harem, I kinda gave up.
Or if I wanted to be lectured on how I'm not doing it "right" I'd go back to college. Or how I'm a "fake" or "weekend" BDSMer, I might tolerate it and still be a part of the BDSM forum.
But since I really don't care to be lectured or called names or "interviewed" by prospective Dom's, I now ignore that section.
The holier-than-thou attitude of a few BDSMer's just left a bad taste in my mouth.
I'm sorry that your experience with BDSM left you sour on it. But I do understand your position as I've seen it Myself several (hundred) times. And it does work both ways - I have been poked and friended and asked to be some subs Master many times as well. I have scened with a few, but I am pretty selective on who I took on. Now of course I don't go into the chatrooms simply because I have the real thing. I don't mind sharing what I know or how I feel about the life, but I don't need another sub or slave. I am happy writing My stories and talking with you all about this stuff!
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by TheDevilsWeakness
the 100th totally uncalled for and disgusting PM from some wannabe Dom, that thinks I would make an awesome slave in his harem
Oh god, this. There are so many who seem to think submissives are completely passive and undiscerning, just sitting lonely...waiting for the first random person to slap a collar on and take them home. I think there are many wannabe "Doms" who are intimidated by women and just want someone compliant and easy because they can't handle an actual relationship. They come on strong with a false front and a lot of silly vampire language, expecting spontaneous submission and obedience from a stranger (and of course, if you say anything teasing or sarcastic they storm off in a huff). This is the opposite of a real dominant, who projects it naturally and inspire their partners to be submissive towards them. A truly dominant man wouldn't be scared off by a partner that showed some wit and intelligence, and would probably enjoy getting her on the end of a leash all the more.
Quote by Master_Jonathan
Don't be "turned off" by the BDSM scene. Just do the parts of it you and your man like and leave the rest to others who enjoy that.
That's what I do, because I'm not interested in the formal "scene". I wouldn't let other people's activities get between me and good spanking :P
I agree with you positivetension. I real Dominant isn't afraid or intimidated by a submissive with a brain. In fact I require it. I don't want a robot - I have to have a submissive that has her own mind and can think for herself. Yes I get the last word, but I also value her opinion. My pet and I have had more than one heated debate over how things should be run but in the end I am the Master. And I have also changed My views on some things because what she said made sense. I use her eyes to look at a situation or problem as well and on occassion, her eyesight was better than Mine!
