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My boyfriend won't tell anyone we are dating

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Guest
Lurker
So my boyfriend won't tell anyone we are together, and he won't let me tell anyone about him... It hurts me, and I've tried to tell him but it's like I'm not talking at all. He gets upset when I add new people but he does it all the time, he continues to say he loves me though and it's starting to make me think bad about myself... I don't know what to do.
Guest
Lurker
He doesn't control you.

If he can't explain himself and give substantial reasons (which, for me to accept it, would have to be something extreme and beyond belief like 'I'm the Lord of Castenstein and if my people discover I'm dating a woman from another country the paparazzi will be all over - and I love my relationship with you untainted') . . . then you have every right to question HIM.

Not YOURSELF.

He clearly has the issues since this is 'his issue' that he's now making 'your issue'.

Personally - I'd look at him like he was fucking nuts and then give him the boot (unless he's the Lord of Castenstein . . . and even then I might re-think it).

I'd probably be like: "Well then if no one knows we're dating I guess no know will know we broke up." Then promptly take my fucking life back.

Besides - is it really dating if you're so secretive you can't even be together in public? Just what does this version of dating entail? Sounds to me like serious cheating - keeping a relationship a secret is what happens when someone's either hiding a life-secret (Lord of Castenstein) or a wife and family (at least - another girlfriend. Some guys like to hoard women and women who let them get away with it are easy targets).
Guest
Lurker
Don't feel bad about yourself, it's all him...he wants his cake and eat it too. He wants to play around while he keeps you all to himself. DON'T put up with that!!! I know it's easier said then done to move on when you love someone, but you will save yourself a lot of heartache in the end. In my opinion, he doesn't sound like a keeper. Good luck and never doubt yourself smile
xxV
honeydipped
The Bee's Knees
my advice: don't claim anyone that doesn't claim you. i highly question anyone's motives for keeping a relationship under wraps. i completely understand keeping your business to yourself - but to not even allow you to admit that you're a couple? nah. move on to someone who would be proud to be with you, you DESERVE it. i wish you the best of luck!

Say. Her. Name.
Mysteria27
Prolific Writer
why be in a relationship like that. Get out of it. Sounds creepy. Is he going to just dump you when he finds somebody better? Save yourself now from pain and anguish. I'd rather be with somebody who is happy and wants me to meet their family and friends and be happy doing so.

Hugs,
Mysteria
Xo
Dani
Big-haired Bitch/Personality Hire
Quote by lilbit2006
So my boyfriend won't tell anyone we are together, and he won't let me tell anyone about him... It hurts me, and I've tried to tell him but it's like I'm not talking at all. He gets upset when I add new people but he does it all the time, he continues to say he loves me though and it's starting to make me think bad about myself... I don't know what to do.


It's as simple as putting your foot down.

If he doesn't respect your relationship enough to be open and honest about it, that should really tell you all you need to know.

"What is the quality of your intent?" - Thurgood Marshall
Katherine
Nerdzilla
Quote by honeydipped
my advice: don't claim anyone that doesn't claim you. i highly question anyone's motives for keeping a relationship under wraps. i completely understand keeping your business to yourself - but to not even allow you to admit that you're a couple? nah. move on to someone who would be proud to be with you, you DESERVE it. i wish you the best of luck!


This.
Kiera
Short Arse Brit
Quote by lilbit2006
So my boyfriend won't tell anyone we are together, and he won't let me tell anyone about him... It hurts me, and I've tried to tell him but it's like I'm not talking at all. He gets upset when I add new people but he does it all the time, he continues to say he loves me though and it's starting to make me think bad about myself... I don't know what to do.


Hi

By this I am assuming that this is an internet relationship?

If so, then maybe he is just private, I rarely venture into relationships on here, it's rare for me to do so and if and when I do, I don't want them to be broadcast to everyone else because it is not their business and that doesn't mean that I am fucking around either because I am exclusive on the occasions that I do...It could just be as simple as that.

If it is a real life relationship then yes, I would have a problem with that and you have every right to have issues with it.
The Duchess of Tart

Please check out my new story, co-written with the amazing Wilful.

https://www.lushstories.com/stories/straight-sex/long-time-coming.aspx

And my latest poem, The Temptation.

https://www.lushstories.com/stories/erotic-poems/the-temptation.aspx
DarkSide
High Lord of Darkness
Quote by kiera


Hi

By this I am assuming that this is an internet relationship?

If so, then maybe he is just private, I rarely venture into relationships on here, it's rare for me to do so and if and when I do, I don't want them to be broadcast to everyone else because it is not their business and that doesn't mean that I am fucking around either because I am exclusive on the occasions that I do...It could just be as simple as that.

If it is a real life relationship then yes, I would have a problem with that and you have every right to have issues with it.


I agree with this. I also think that your initial statement does not include all the information that is required to make a fair judgement.

If its not an online relationship, then does religion preclude him from opening your relationship to everyone? It doesn't matter what some of us think about this. Religion is a powerful force. Other reasons may be just as valid.

I used to be a pervert. In here, I'm normal!

Watch this space...She is really - cumming soon!
ChuckEPoo
Chuckanator
Quote by lilbit2006
So my boyfriend won't tell anyone we are together, and he won't let me tell anyone about him... It hurts me, and I've tried to tell him but it's like I'm not talking at all. He gets upset when I add new people but he does it all the time, he continues to say he loves me though and it's starting to make me think bad about myself... I don't know what to do.


Is this an online relationship or in the flesh. You can't trust anything on line. If he's not recognizing you then drop his sorry ass.
Kiera
Short Arse Brit
Quote by DarkSide


I agree with this. I also think that your initial statement does not include all the information that is required to make a fair judgement.

If its not an online relationship, then does religion preclude him from opening your relationship to everyone? It doesn't matter what some of us think about this. Religion is a powerful force. Other reasons may be just as valid.


I agree with this we need more information.

Not sure if say this is an online relationship here, for example a sex website that his reasoning for keeping schtum about their relationship is likely to be about religion tbh but one never knows.
The Duchess of Tart

Please check out my new story, co-written with the amazing Wilful.

https://www.lushstories.com/stories/straight-sex/long-time-coming.aspx

And my latest poem, The Temptation.

https://www.lushstories.com/stories/erotic-poems/the-temptation.aspx
Guest
Lurker
Then he's NOT your boyfriend, you AREN'T together and frankly, you could do better...

(I do NOT MEAN to insult you or hurt your feelings...) TRULY I DO NOT!!!

But... C'mon????

xx SF
Guest
Lurker
Sounds just plain weird to me! Something is very wrong.
simplyjohn
Site administrator
Assuming you mean here .. he may have very good reasons for not wishing to broadcast the relationship .. its typically evident by the change of status and the positioning of friends on your relevant list but *not* everyone does that for various reasons .. some are healthy and some are not .. I think you would be justified in asking him why he doesnt want to tell others.

You should know .. regardless .. whether he is your boyfriend or not.
Dani
Big-haired Bitch/Personality Hire
Quote by simplyjohn
Assuming you mean here .. he may have very good reasons for not wishing to broadcast the relationship .. its typically evident by the change of status and the positioning of friends on your relevant list but *not* everyone does that for various reasons .. some are healthy and some are not .. I think you would be justified in asking him why he doesnt want to tell others.

You should know .. regardless .. whether he is your boyfriend or not.


This is really rich coming from you, SJ.

You've been hiding your boyfriend for years.

"What is the quality of your intent?" - Thurgood Marshall
simplyjohn
Site administrator
Quote by Dani


This is really rich coming from you, SJ.

You've been hiding your boyfriend for years.


All this time .. I trusted you and now the dogs out of the bag

*shakes head*
Tranquil
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by lilbit2006
So my boyfriend won't tell anyone we are together, and he won't let me tell anyone about him... It hurts me, and I've tried to tell him but it's like I'm not talking at all. He gets upset when I add new people but he does it all the time, he continues to say he loves me though and it's starting to make me think bad about myself... I don't know what to do.


first step in being a no one within your own eyes. Do not allow this. If he won't yell from the root tops that he is bloody lucky to be the one that has you then he is not worthy of being with you.

Do not allow yourself to be a hidden booty call. because that is what you are saying from the above. That is all you will ever be.

No matter the situation, YOU DESERVE BETTER!
petrova
Active Ink Slinger
Dumped him. So many good fish in the sea.
I could show you INCREDIBLE things...
Guest
Lurker
I learned two things, if something doesn't feel good from the beginning, it never will. And if two involved aren't on the same page, bad feelings that are product of that, will destroy whatever good there was.

He makes you feel bad about yourself? That really doesn't sound good. Hold on, is this Lush relationship? If so, move on, there are plenty, plenty of guys who would love to be yours. And as petrova above said
Quote by petrova
Dumped him. So many good fish in the sea.