As a lesbian I want to know...

What do men really see in lesbians? I mean, I just generally want to know.

I see women who love (and lust for) other women. Not sure what more there is at the collective level. They are individuals and all have their strengths and weaknesses. I was blessed to be a member of an LGBTQ+ welcoming church with a number of active lesbian couples including for a time, a lesbian minister and her partner (sadly, they broke up while the minister was still serving that congregation). Great folks from many walks of life from a school bus driver to a banker (the minister's partner) to a university professor and administrator. That group kind of drifted away later, unfortunately, and I eventually left for unrelated reasons.

So my lens on lesbians may be a bit of an outlier in that it is shaped by actual experience working closely with them in that church.

I think a lot of men are threatened by actual lesbians IRL, but are nevertheless turned on by lesbian sex. So I'm going to address your question in terms of what men see in lesbian porn and erotica. Apologies if you find my response to this very frequent question too porn-focused, but I think that's where the appeal actually lies.

On the superficial level, I think it's two main things. Men find women's bodies incredibly attractive, and seeing two together doubles the visual pleasure. Plus, seeing two women together may be less threatening than male-female scenes, by removing the competitive/comparative aspect of having another man in the picture, who of course is almost always hotter than the viewer.

A little deeper, I think it makes for an action free of the traditionallly coded-and-loaded baggage of male-female interactions - much as gay-male porn often does for women and especially lesbians. Of course, that's despite the fact that lesbian porn is one of the least realistic genres (or so lesbians tell us), because it's primarily produced to satisfy the straight male gaze, while gay-male porn is seen as one of the most realistic, because it isn't.

Another reason for me personally is that as a very strongly bisexual male, I'm heavily turned on by same-sex sex, regardless of whether it's men fucking men or women fucking women.

Finally, while I enjoy lesbian porn all of the reasons stated above, I like that it usually at least takes a shot at portraying the scenario, with tension and uncertainty, leading into a same-sex encounter, in a way that I have always wished bi male porn would do - and rarely does. I find that there is hardly anything more emotionally charged, tentative, delicate and ultimately hot than the prospect of two straight-presenting men getting together (with or without a woman present). And bi male porn gets it wrong every fucking time. Seriously, I probably wouldn't have published a hundred-plus bi male stories on Lush if bi male porn weren't so awful. So despite the often abysmal acting and supposed "unrealism" of how it portrays actual lesbian sex (not like we guys can tell), when I see two women working through across that boundary and doing these sexy things together, my mind sometimes drifts to imagining a similar interaction between myself and another man, giving me what bi male porn doesn't. I know of at least one or two other bi Lushies who experience this too.

It might be as simple as lesbians are out of reach for men. And as humans we often want what we can’t have. Or I may be way off base.

Quote by darkroot50

It might be as simple as lesbians are out of reach for men. And as humans we often want what we can’t have. Or I may be way off base.

Didn't think of that, but makes sense. I tend not to waste my emotional energy longing after what I can't have (says the guy who keeps publishing his fantasies on Lush), but I have observed that a lot of people are attracted precisely to what's off-limits.

Just math. If one naked woman is sexy, two of them getting nasty with each other is three times as sexy. And of course, the dumb male fantasy is that somehow we'll figure out how to get in between them with our magical penises and show them what they've been missing (And before you object, first tell me that 'converting' naive straight girls isn't a massively common fantasy in the lesbian world - Same deal).

But porn aside, it's actually pretty cool to relate to someone of the opposite gender when you take the possibility of sex totally out of the equation. Lesbians are great people for the most part, and many of them are pretty generous in sharing their knowledge if you approach them with the right attitude.

Always productive time watching and learning new techniques 👍🏻

It never occurred to me until I saw your question and it still doesn't. You are female people, just people. I wouldn't know what your sexual preference was unless you told me, and I'd still see you as people. I would however have a bazillion questions since you opened up that can.

Quote by hisplaceofinterest

It never occurred to me until I saw your question and it still doesn't.

Really? This is a question that has been asked by literally almost every woman, ever, at least since porn went mainstream. I know I've had decades to think about my answer above.

I just see that she prefers being with another woman. Both of my Moms are lesbians