Excuse me, but I'm looking for some education here.
Is a switch always a switch, throughout their BDSM lives or is there a certain point where they find what they like and decide to be either sub or Dom/Domme permanently?
I know this may sound a bit ignorant and trollish, but I'm genuinely interested in the psychology of a switch and if it's possible for someone who switches to fully commit to being either sub or Dom/Domme.
Switching is very possible. I am a sub who was introduced to domming. It's not as much fun as being a sub but I can see the eroticism in both ... now
I knew I was a sub, always...but one person, one day made me think otherwise. It was strange it just happened...my maternal instincts too over and all I wanted to do was protect her. I asked for help, because what does an extremely submissive person know about being a Domme, nothing....I was going on my mom reactions. It was nice in the beginning, very nice, the exploring and learning new things. In getting the help to be the best Mistress (Princess was what I was called) I realized that I was not a switch and being a submissive was what I was missing. The relationship ended not in a good way, all on my part, personal issues got in the way, trust was broken, and in the end it was just not what either of us needed.
So do I think it is possible to be a switch, of course if you are just playing as in role playing. I don't think it is possible to participate in the lifestyle 24/7 and be a switch, especially to the same person. Now if you wanted to bring a person under you and your Dom/me then it could be possible. This is not my cup of tea.
My nature is submissive and I think I am quite good at it.
Being a Switch means you like being a submissive some of the time and to dominate sometime. I'm a switch, depending on the person I'm attracted to. I could be wrong.
I think I'll try to answer my own question, mostly because I'm bored, but also because I want to explore it further.
I, myself, am a switch. I find myself quite easily able to go from sub to Dom, sometimes in the same session. I think, at some point, I'll probably be either a Dom or a sub full time, but I like it when I'm with another switch. It brings a slight power struggle, depending on the person, which can actually be quite fun.
It still doesn't really answer the question of whether one can be a switch and then commit properly to being a sub or Dom, but I think with the right person, I could be their Dom or sub full time.
hmmm I'm still not hearing a definite 'yes'. What I'm curious about, is whether someone can have a long-term relationship as a submissive, then a long-term relationship as a Dom, and still feel comfortable in, and enjoy both roles. Perhaps I have the wrong idea of what a 'switch' is. thanks to the peeps i asked to post on Ginger's thread.
Its not part of my lifestyle really anymore. I mean the serious BDSM, not the playing around stuff. I can't switch. I can't sub and it just made the situation frustrating. Now hubs and I will play and he will spank me and call me a bad girl or some light stuff but that is all I can do. I think it depends on how strong certain traits are in your personality. I know some D's try it to better understand what their sub may feel or to come up with some new ideas and I was curious but No. I sucked. The urge to dominate was too strong and I ended up hurting him because he cared deeply for me and I him. Very hard parting with each other but I could not give what he wanted. I have rarely, in my own experience met someone who could truly switch in the serious BDSM scene. When I say truly because maybe the person was never really a D or maybe that person was never really an s. Maybe some people can but I couldn't and I don't claim to speak for everyone.
Edited.
I've always thought you can only be one or other, not both. Maybe I'm just not understanding it correctly. But I would think if you enjoy being a certain way (be it dominant or submissive) why would you be open to going the other way?
I'm just curious
When you train in the craft of BDSM--you explore each fetish that turns you on. A Master or Mistress helps you extract maximum pleasure from the fetish.
A TRUE Dominatrix will go either way--she must to round out her training. All the most common fetishes are explored
IF she progresses to Mistress she then has the experience to train either sex and pass on the knowledge she attained through HER training.
I have trained several over the years and it's a lifestyle that has many rewards---both financially and emotionally.
I am naturally very dominant in my everyday life and at work...this includes in the bedroom. However, sometimes, I like someone else to be in charge....and I enjoy it. Basically, pending my mood. Just have fun! No worries.
Yes, I can switch. I have a tendency to be a bottom, but hormones being what they are, I feel the need to top. I love to share or gift if you will, the glorous release my dom gives to me.
It's not a you do me.... Now I do you. It all about creating the scene, the release and most of all the pleasure we get from eachother.
I am a switch and shall always be one...I am submissive to one person..that would be my Master...My sub is submissive to me and shall always be...I am always a dominant when with her...I love the feeling of being both
doing my best to be good..