So a friend of mine is dating my sister in-law and he is getting played. My sister in law admits to my wife she constantly goes out with other guys trying to find mr right. I'm also beginning to think she's lesbian or at least bi since she is spending a considerable amount of time with a female coworker who is lesbian. should I tell him he's getting played? If you were in his position would you want to know about her going out with other guys and girls?
I would definitely bring up your disaproval to your wife in the hopes that she can talk to her sister about her behavior. I think that going straight to the guy may not be the right course of action since he is dating your sister-in-law after all and it is never a good idea to go behind the back of family. Still, seeing as it does concern a friend of yours, it is worth discussing with your wife.
I can’t think of a good tagline so this will have to do. Suggest a better one for me?
Unless she made some commitment to your friend, why do you think he's getting played? Aren't they both free to date around with whomever they wish, until they agree to be exclusive?
I agree with hopp3r. You should bring up a tone of disapproval in front of your wife in hopes that she could maybe set her sister on the right path.
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Unless they're in an exclusive relationship, then who she dates is really no one's concern.
If you feel some sort of obligation to your friend to make him aware of what's going on, go for it. But it's definitely not your wife's (or anyone else's) place, obligation, or responsibility to 'set her sister in law straight' or anything of that nature.
If you feel so inclined to bring your friend into the loop, do so. But don't be surprised if it's something of which he's already aware.
Also, her sexuality is something else that's really no one's concern. Spending time with a coworker who happens to be a lesbian does not automatically mean she's lesbian or bisexual.
To answer your question, yes, if I thought I were seeing someone exclusively and a friend knew otherwise, I'd want to know.
But, to put it quite bluntly, beyond the basic responsibility you feel towards your friend to alert him of any alleged infidelity, you're delving into territory that's really no business of yours.
░P░U░S░S░Y░ ░I░N░ ░B░I░O░
Part of being in an adult relationship is speaking up for yourself and figuring out any issues... Let them find their way, if something is going on, it will come out....
OMG!!! They are dating and the girl talks to a lesbian...anything could happen to him!!!! Even something like THIS :
**Image removed by moderator. Too explicit for this section of the forum.**
Leave it alone!!
In my humble opinion the "if they haven't agreed to be exclusive" is twisting reality. In spite of what it looks like here on lush, in our western society the norm in lover's relationships is still, that they are exclusive, unless agreed otherwise. So if those two are indeed in a relationship, what she does is cheating, unless and until she tells him about it honestly. And then he can either agree to a new set of rules or end the relationship.
I believe you should first talk TO a person, before you talk about that person. If you really feel the need to act, confront your sister in law yourself. Maybe you'll find out, they've already agreed on an open relationship and if not, you should at least give her the chance to be honest to your friend herself. If she won't, you could ask your wife to try, and if she won't or it doesn't work, you can still tell him, but you won't have gone behind someone's back.
A little kindness can be so valuable, yet costs almost nothing
In many countries being gay is a crime, and even in modern societies, politicians try to legalise discrimination. Your voice can make a difference. Have a look at All Out to find out how.
Hey... pssst.... that's an l (as in luscious) at the end of my name, not an i I've spoken to a lesbian. Does that make me one! - Fuck - I hope so!
I used to be a pervert. In here, I'm normal!
Watch this space...She is really - cumming soon!
Thank you everyone, there was some good advice here. Others not so much. I have nothing against gays and lesbians as I consider myself bi-sexual. I wrote to point out she is in other relationships besides with my friend. I do not know if they have talked about being exclusive with each other which is where some good advice came in. I was distressed over this since he is a good friend and I would rather not see him hurt, But the advice has been consistent to stay out of it.
If she is looking for Mr Right why shouldn't she play the field.
If she is Bi then she will experience the best of both worlds.
I did both for years before finding my perfect partners (FWB)
I don't know how close you are to your friend but if he is getting too possessive of this woman it might be wise to tell him to cool it for a while. She is not convinced he IS Mr Right yet.
Second question first - yes, I would want to know.
Are you sure he doesn't know? Touchy spot; sort of in-law v friend. Gotta be careful about repercussions. I'd try to figure out a way to ensure he discovers it without me being the one doing the revealing. Not exactly courageous, but family crap can be very dangerous.
Did you ever consider that he may know and actually like the idea of her being with other men and women. That it is a big turn for both of them. I have been shared by Hubbie with both men and women for over 36 years of our over 37 years of marriage. It's awesome and works for us.
Brandie
you knew it all along, didn't you?