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1ball
Over 90 days ago
Straight Male, 69
United States
Forum
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I've struggled a lot in my life with "what it means to be a man". I came of age in a time when I think the definition of that was changing rapidly, but maybe it still is and maybe it always has. In my "formative" years, a hero could be anything from a man who went to Vietnam and got his balls blown off "for his country" to a man who said "hell no, conscription is slavery" and either went to prison or to Canada to protest not being given a choice. My father was a terrible example of a man, but you could only tell that from the inside of our house looking out. People on the outside looking in thought he was a good man. Coming to grips with the hypocrisy of that was crucial.
The one thing that finally gave me peace with myself was deciding that before I could be a man, I had to be a human and that means recognizing that I am the owner of my life and that living it free of shackles placed on me by the expectations of others was more important than being a cookie-cutter clone of society's ideal citizen. After that, I could only respect myself as I man by remaining true to myself. That means rejecting the belief that the old stereotype of a manly man was all good. I also reject the belief that all the men in the so-called manly professions are being true to themselves. Some of them are living up to standards set for them by pressure from others and doing so for wrong reasons. They're letting their individuality be stifled. But the same is true for the "new age sensitive kind of guy". Men are some combination of alpha, beta and loner. They're only doing it right if they're finding enough Inner Peace.
The one thing that finally gave me peace with myself was deciding that before I could be a man, I had to be a human and that means recognizing that I am the owner of my life and that living it free of shackles placed on me by the expectations of others was more important than being a cookie-cutter clone of society's ideal citizen. After that, I could only respect myself as I man by remaining true to myself. That means rejecting the belief that the old stereotype of a manly man was all good. I also reject the belief that all the men in the so-called manly professions are being true to themselves. Some of them are living up to standards set for them by pressure from others and doing so for wrong reasons. They're letting their individuality be stifled. But the same is true for the "new age sensitive kind of guy". Men are some combination of alpha, beta and loner. They're only doing it right if they're finding enough Inner Peace.
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I've been seeing ads on TV lately for a dating site called farmersonly.com. Because "city folk just don't get it". Try there.
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If I was given that honor, I would just do everything I could to make it as enjoyable as possible. I wouldn't get all romantic with dinner and wine that you would be too nervous to appreciate. I would give you time to explore my body and get comfortable with it. I would explore yours, too, and do everything I could to let you know how much I desired you. There probably wouldn't be a single square inch on your body that wasn't felt or kissed or licked before penetration occurred. Hopefully you would have at least one orgasm before then. When it came time for the cherry pop, I think I would want you on top, setting your own pace. Once you had it all in and gave some kind of signal, then I would start with short strokes and work up to full strokes. Maybe you wouldn't come from it. Lots of women don't. But you would know it was appreciated and enjoyed. And you would be thanked for the honor.
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Not a woman but, I prefer stories written in first person present tense, but first or third, present or past work. They need to be well written and grammatically correct. I like believable situations. I like to hear that the woman is really enjoying it, especially if she's receiving oral sex.
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Quote by thetangofox
i want to be pegged, cant say why but it seems like a good time, just a fantasy because the wife called me gay when i brought it up, if you ride a chicks strap on while you masturbate on her tots is this gay?
Have her read this:
http://www.aphroditewomenshealth.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=379479
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Quote by slipperywhenwet2012
Have you ever heard of cheating emotionally? If it's something you don't want your wife to know about, then you automatically know it's not right. End of story.
I don't think I would go quite that far. It depends on the reason you don't want her to know about it. It's not good to give your partner's opinion too much weight on some details of your life. For example, viewing porn is not emotional cheating even if she would disapprove. I don't think writing and publishing erotic stories is emotional cheating either, unless the connection between the writer and the reader is specific, even if the intent is to arouse. But I'll admit I might be quibbling over shades of gray and my wife might see it differently.
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Quote by Kitten86
i mean women who don't masturbate but want to please man who they might unintentially arouse .
So she pretends to go along in order to please him? As long as she's not hurting herself by doing it, that seems like a nice gesture to me. If it was my wife and she was doing it for some other guy, I think that would be crossing the line.
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Quote by cv150vanfleet
I don't personally think its cheating. I make a distinction between satisfying my physical and the emotional bond I have with my wife.
Has your wife given you the green light to make sexual emotional connections with others? In my marriage, a certain amount of flirting is okay, but cyber would be crossing the line. Asking for photos would be crossing the line. Viewing volunteered photos wouldn't. It's all about the intent of the connection. You say you get a better orgasm from interacting sexually with someone than from simply viewing porn and that connection is fine if it's fine with the person for whom you have sworn to "forsake all others", otherwise it seems like cheating to me.
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Not sure why you think the women would be smarter about why a guy might like thinking about taking a walk on the wild side. Something about the fantasy is appealing to you but it doesn't necessarily mean that actually trying it would appeal to you. It could be just a "forbidden fruit" fantasy, which could lead to a disappointing actual experience. It could be just a curiosity about your boundaries. It could be a genuine repressed desire. Do you fantasize about it happening to you and under what circumstances? Is it coerced or extorted? Do you seek it and seduce the guy?
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I'm going to reveal a deep, dark, well-hidden truth about myself here. When I watch just about anything on BBC America, I have to turn on the subtitles in order to follow the story completely. It's the spoken accents and dialects that I have a problem with. When there is any difficulty at all with written accents, I just slow down when reading through them. It helps if I don't have to slow down where it will mess with the flow of the story, but it usually won't.
I prefer not to read obscure accents in narrative, but obscure is a regional thing. Narrative also suffers if there is too much slang or colloquial expressions, but those can do so much to set the tone of the story. The point of a story is to tell the story in a manner that it will be understood. If you're going to confine your audience to people who live in Brooklyn or East Los Angeles, have at it with all the rich fullness of those areas, but when your audience is the full breadth of the English speaking regions on the planet, a little restraint in the narrative might go a long way.
I just recently completed a series story where I threw in a lot of Italian, some Spanish and some French in the dialog. I always tried to provide a translation of some sort within the next few sentences, with the exception of where I was either repeating what was previously translated or using very common examples of those languages that I think have permeated English speaking regions through common movies and TV. I still had one comment about somebody having to google to understand the story. I probably relied on the recognizability of the words too much.
I liked the accents in your story, Daisy. Don't pull them completely, but if the dialog is essential to the story, be careful not to lose the message in favor of authenticity.
I prefer not to read obscure accents in narrative, but obscure is a regional thing. Narrative also suffers if there is too much slang or colloquial expressions, but those can do so much to set the tone of the story. The point of a story is to tell the story in a manner that it will be understood. If you're going to confine your audience to people who live in Brooklyn or East Los Angeles, have at it with all the rich fullness of those areas, but when your audience is the full breadth of the English speaking regions on the planet, a little restraint in the narrative might go a long way.
I just recently completed a series story where I threw in a lot of Italian, some Spanish and some French in the dialog. I always tried to provide a translation of some sort within the next few sentences, with the exception of where I was either repeating what was previously translated or using very common examples of those languages that I think have permeated English speaking regions through common movies and TV. I still had one comment about somebody having to google to understand the story. I probably relied on the recognizability of the words too much.
I liked the accents in your story, Daisy. Don't pull them completely, but if the dialog is essential to the story, be careful not to lose the message in favor of authenticity.
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I hope you get a lot of women answering this, but if you don't, reading stories here that are authored by women might suffice. Maybe your wife is into er... something embarrassing, and generally illegal all over the world, even between consenting adults*. That seems to be pretty popular here.
*Edited:
*Edited:
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Quote by Betheny
They tend to be useless and not used by verry many of us. Give me the good old strapon anytime with a gorgeous ladyb attached and I'm in nirvana. Nothing rivals her on top and her soft body pressed to me.
Do you get good stimulation when wearing a harness, or is it more about what you're doing for your partner?