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DarkSide
3 hours ago
Heteroflexible Male
United Kingdom
Forum
that's what happens when you don't get served fast enough!
High Lord of Darkness
I've come in for a very large drink, triple whisky perhaps, or something even bigger. I need it.
G - less of the shrinkage - Mrs G won't be amused at that. Unless of course it's already 20".
It's another hottie over the pond. We all like this weather, but now we're all complaining that it's too hot, bans on water usage and all that. We have all these unused underground coal mines - why don't we store water in them when it pisses down for 80% of the year. LOL.
No water in the whisky. I need it neat.
G - less of the shrinkage - Mrs G won't be amused at that. Unless of course it's already 20".
It's another hottie over the pond. We all like this weather, but now we're all complaining that it's too hot, bans on water usage and all that. We have all these unused underground coal mines - why don't we store water in them when it pisses down for 80% of the year. LOL.
No water in the whisky. I need it neat.
High Lord of Darkness
I have learned that:
I can write dirty stories better than I once could (he says, cautiously).
I like a lot of people on here and I really want the best for them.
I still have a filthy and inventive mind.
I am older than I was when I joined.
The comments I read on stories and forums, always seem to surprise me, even now.
I can write dirty stories better than I once could (he says, cautiously).
I like a lot of people on here and I really want the best for them.
I still have a filthy and inventive mind.
I am older than I was when I joined.
The comments I read on stories and forums, always seem to surprise me, even now.
High Lord of Darkness
Congratulations to the top three winners - Very well deserved and I am honoured to have made it into the top ten as well. Thank you to everyone that read, voted and commented, and especially to those of you that thought it was worthy of the top ten.
Thanks to Nicola for awarding this an RR.
Thanks to Nicola for awarding this an RR.
High Lord of Darkness
Quote by Ping
Proper Words???What the hell are those? Is that a separate category in the Queen's English dictionary?
I've heard proper colloquially misused and overused by a certain culture across the Atlantic.
That's a proper observation, one might say.
Great reply. That will teach me to be posh!!! ?. Next time I will use dirty or filthy or erotic words ?
High Lord of Darkness
Quote by Ping
It's been like that for years. The closest I've ever gotten is 998.
Look for contractions - I have to I've, I will to I'll, he had, to he'd - stuff like that. Chances are you'll save a few words that way and make the cut.
Best of luck!
Yes but once you've taken out the contractions - you end up adding more proper words to the story.
I do believe it's a bug and I'm sure that I've reported it to Buz as well. I think my magic number is 996.
High Lord of Darkness
Quote by curvygalore
Blimey! I had no idea such a thing existed! Probably something to do with being a technophobe and having no memory to speak of. Cheers, John!
Neither did I - I still think the green tick is more obvious. However, I now know that I have 41 pages of history telling me what stories I have read. I need to do some analysis of this to see what my preferences are?!
High Lord of Darkness
I would like to see a green tick next to the stories on the main page when I have read a story. By read, I mean awarded a score or left a comment.
I find myself often having to go into a story to see if I left a comment before I start reading one.
I'm getting old, dementia is setting in, memory is not what it used to be. ???
I find myself often having to go into a story to see if I left a comment before I start reading one.
I'm getting old, dementia is setting in, memory is not what it used to be. ???
High Lord of Darkness
I think you should have said, "I'm sorry I made it grow!" and then winked at him.
That would have been fun.
But to be honest, if a guy can't control his cock in situations like that then he is lost. He either took advantage of your bottom and made himself erect - in which case he would have blushed and felt like a stupid pervert when you said sorry, or he genuinely tried to suppress his erection and failed. In that case, I would have smiled and said sorry myself. Don't think I would have blushed but I might have when younger.
That would have been fun.
But to be honest, if a guy can't control his cock in situations like that then he is lost. He either took advantage of your bottom and made himself erect - in which case he would have blushed and felt like a stupid pervert when you said sorry, or he genuinely tried to suppress his erection and failed. In that case, I would have smiled and said sorry myself. Don't think I would have blushed but I might have when younger.
High Lord of Darkness
A porn movie should be looking into someone's life, all be it a private moment.
Full scenes would be a must. The people must love doing what they do. There would be no looking or glancing into the camera unless it's situated between the actors eyes. Or the person is facing a camera straight on.
I think a scene full of hidden cameras all shooting at the same time would accomplish this. Then there would be a lot of editing to put together the right clips. I love to see the woman have an orgasm. Eyes rolling back into her head an option.
Full scenes would be a must. The people must love doing what they do. There would be no looking or glancing into the camera unless it's situated between the actors eyes. Or the person is facing a camera straight on.
I think a scene full of hidden cameras all shooting at the same time would accomplish this. Then there would be a lot of editing to put together the right clips. I love to see the woman have an orgasm. Eyes rolling back into her head an option.
High Lord of Darkness
Let me get this straight Poems to be submitted on....
2= Tuesday, 4=Thursday, 6=Saturday, 8=Monday, 10=Wednesday....No wait Monday is day 1 and Wednesday is 3 and they are odd....Confused.com!
What if the poems have an odd number of verses - are they allowed to be submitted on uneven days?
What about exhibitionist and voyeuristic stories? Will they have to be submitted through keyholes and open curtained windows; with or without the lights on.
2= Tuesday, 4=Thursday, 6=Saturday, 8=Monday, 10=Wednesday....No wait Monday is day 1 and Wednesday is 3 and they are odd....Confused.com!
What if the poems have an odd number of verses - are they allowed to be submitted on uneven days?
What about exhibitionist and voyeuristic stories? Will they have to be submitted through keyholes and open curtained windows; with or without the lights on.
High Lord of Darkness
As a teenager I was not as outgoing as I am now. Not as confident. I can say that through the ages my sexual experiences have gone beyond anything I imagined when I was 18 or 20 even. I knew about them - but they were the stories that filled the pages of porn magazines or came from pub chatter and boisterousness.
I think finding the right partner to share experiences helps a great deal. Because when two of you are on a journey of discovery (sexual ones that is) then it's awesome. Kinkyness comes with that. I think I am more ready to spank someone now than I would have been when I was younger - and I think that's because I now know that some women love that and want and need it.
Every facet of sex is not - some areas are only to some people - others think they are normal....
Like my strapline!
I think finding the right partner to share experiences helps a great deal. Because when two of you are on a journey of discovery (sexual ones that is) then it's awesome. Kinkyness comes with that. I think I am more ready to spank someone now than I would have been when I was younger - and I think that's because I now know that some women love that and want and need it.
Every facet of sex is not - some areas are only to some people - others think they are normal....
Like my strapline!
High Lord of Darkness
I've had a woman give me a BJ and then immediately got up and kissed me with a mouthful to share. What do you do? You kiss her back of course.
I think her words were "If you expect me to swallow it then you can share it."
I would have done the same to her if she squirted in my mouth.
I have also gone down on a woman after having sex with her. Tasting both is quite nice.
I think her words were "If you expect me to swallow it then you can share it."
I would have done the same to her if she squirted in my mouth.
I have also gone down on a woman after having sex with her. Tasting both is quite nice.
