Lies are not a good foundation for a friendship. My boyfriends have all known that I love sex, and that I love giving blowjobs. WHen I first got into grad school, I met a guy and fell for him in a big way - he was destined to be much more than a boyfriend if things didn't blow up. One afternoon, after a wonderful romp in bed, he started telling me about some of his girlfriends, and asking me about my past boyfriends. He was a great lover, but had not had a lot of experience - he'd had exactly 3 girlfriends in his life, gave me their names( I knew one) and I was number 4. I was surprised at the low number, but they had trained him well! But when he told me I was number 4 in the listing, I gave him a little derisive laugh, which I now know was a mistake. "Four? Thats it? lol." He gave me this puppy-dog almost hurt look, and asked me how many guys I'd been with. For a second I was working up a number -- truthfully, without sitting down and going over my memories, there was no way I could give him a digit. There were guys I fucked a hundred times, some guys were only handjobs, some were blowjobs, and there were the occasional girls, too.... There was no way I could remember them all, going all the back to my young years..... So I said, with as straight a face as possible, "the number isn't really important, but there have been more than 4", not wanting to expand the score past what his was....He pressed, and by his tone I could tell he was hoping for a low number...he said "5? 10? 15? more?" All I could say again was that the number wasn't important, but there had been "at least" 10 guys, starting from when I was pretty young... We cuddled for a while, and it was nice...I played with him and he got a semi-erection, and I was gentle and thorough with it in my hand...and as I was holding his cock, he asked "...so, when we're together, do you think of them? When you have my cock in your hand , like now, do you think of someone else? were they all bigger than me?" I sensed instant trouble, and told him the truth about his cock - "your cock is gorgeous, and yes, I know that because I have seen a bunch of others, and I like yours. I'm with you right now, and hopefully for a very long time, and I have never thought of another guy or his cock when I'm with you..." which was pretty much true - there had been a couple of sensational cocks with memorable fucks, and sometimes its tough not to compare. I took advantage of my small frame, "...when you're with me, caressing my breasts and sucking on my nipples, do you think of other girls, and wish I were bigger (I am a B cup, and I know his last gf, the one I know, was at least a C cup)? You're giving me incredible pleasure - I hope you like my breasts... they're all yours and there for the asking..." His cock got harder, and he agreed .. and he said the first time he saw me naked, he was a little disappointed in the small breasts, but has come to realize how nice they are....
I said "Why don't we just agree that the past is past, it can't be taken back, but it has made us who we are today ..."...He just looked over and kissed me, got very hard, and picked me up and put me in cowgirl position, lowering me onto his cock (Did I mention, he was a hockey player, strong as a bull?). The topic of numbers came up quite a few more times, and each time I could tell that the relationship was in jeopardy if I was brutally truthful, since he seemed to be very sensitive about the thought of me being with a lot of other guys .. funny, he didn't seem to mind if it were only 5 or 10....but I know the real number would probably blow him away.
So I lived with that lie for a while, treading very carefully around the number thing. One evening, however, we bumped into one of my old bfs - very innocent, accidental meeting him at a store, he complimented me on how good I looked and that he thinks about me once in awhile....and the interrogation started when we were alone, and ramped up fast. "What did he mean 'he thinks about you ' - does he have nude pictures of you? Does he think of you when he's screwing another girl? did you suck his dick a lot? is his bigger than mine? did he get harder than me? is he the one you think about..." that last bit was the straw that broke the camel's back. I got up, looked at him and called him a jealous little worm.. I told him that no, i did not think of the guy we met ever - he was in the past. I did not know if he had any nude pics of me, and if he did, and jerks off with them, thats a compliment to me. I told him that his ( the current soon to be ex bf) cock was one of the best I'd ever had, and that yes, of course, I sucked the other guys cock - I probably sucked it a hundred times, and I've sucked at least a hundred other cocks in my life. But I guess I'm not sucking yours anymore, because you can't stand that I've been with a bunch of guys. You were guessing 15 or 20? Well, lol, it was many times that, and I can't even remember some of their names, it was so long ago and so meaningless.
Sorry for the rant -- he really could have been much more than a mere boyfriend, if he didn't have this trouble with the number count and his jealousy. I couldnt live with that over my head constantly.
I had a great relationship, built on a lie of omission and it blew up. I doubt if it would have started at all had I been honest right up front - I'll never know, but lying is not a good tactic.
Active Ink Slinger
About an hour ago - with lunch.
