But then again, at least I wouldn't get a sore jaw blowing it, so maybe small is better hmmmm 
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Fugly
Over 90 days ago
Bisexual Female
0 miles · Sydney
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Quote by shadowcat
Is it just me or are you getting bored of entering a forum topic and it has been hijacked by people having a private conversation. They are talking about anything and everything and the whole essence of the forum has been lost.
If you want to have a private conversation do it somewhere else.
Ok rant, over tell me what you think.
I think what shadowcat is saying is that there is a time and place for everything and have to agree with her to some extent. As much as I love to see the humor in the forums, I also like to see respect given to the original poster and to the topic, especially when it is, say, a personal question in the relationship section etc. Not every topic has to be 'fun'.
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@ Winky
How you could be bored with all this friends turning on friends, the overuse sarcasm, fighting, the drama, the gangs - I will never know LOL
It's your opinion and you are entitled to make an opinion, so please don't take the responses to heart that you may feel you might stop posting - they/we are just a bit protective of a site we love. Maybe it's just not you winky, maybe it's something we all need to work on to liven/welcome this place up???
How you could be bored with all this friends turning on friends, the overuse sarcasm, fighting, the drama, the gangs - I will never know LOL
It's your opinion and you are entitled to make an opinion, so please don't take the responses to heart that you may feel you might stop posting - they/we are just a bit protective of a site we love. Maybe it's just not you winky, maybe it's something we all need to work on to liven/welcome this place up???
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Hello Shylass
If you wish to hide your 'Add a friend' in your activity list, it needs to be highlighted in grey as in your picture example - so the answer is not.
In your picture it shows that everyone will be able to see when you score a story and when you comment on a story and no one will be able to see what you do, as everything else is set to hide.
If you wish to hide your 'Add a friend' in your activity list, it needs to be highlighted in grey as in your picture example - so the answer is not.
In your picture it shows that everyone will be able to see when you score a story and when you comment on a story and no one will be able to see what you do, as everything else is set to hide.
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Quote by lychee
While i generally dislike disagreeing with people i have to say fugs you are incorrect.
Venturing into ANY new relationship, be it bdsm, {i am a submissive and have been for many years} straight, gay, martian.. i mean really the list could go on.. there will always be fear.
It is something that comes with new, unchartered territory. It comes as we venture into an unknown NEW relationship and find our footing. It heightens our awareness and strengthens our convictions in what we seek, what we need and what we strive for.
Now were you to say that those that felt fear after being in a relationship then i would be more comfortable agreeing with you. However if you wish to discount fear at the onset of a relationship, i would politely say that you may want to rethink things.
Maybe I am just a freak of nature! I go into anything new with full on excitement, happiness, optimism. I don't start a relationship with 'what if I get hurt..?, what if? what if?'. I deal with the negatives of a relationship when it happens, rather than worry about what if before it happens.
If optimism is wrong and I am incorrect and I should be pessimistic and question, fear and doubt everything before it even starts, well then, I welcome and embrace being a freak
but that is not the point I am trying to make and obviously still can't make clear about the word fear and bdsm
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Quote by Dudealicious
Wow all of these heated posts due to 1 word.
Fear is a distressing negative sensation induced by a perceived threat. It is a basic survival mechanism occurring in response to a specific stimulus, such as pain or the threat of danger.Fear is apparently a universal emotion;all persons, consciously or unconsciously, have fear in some sort.[1].In short, fear is the ability to recognize danger leading to an urge to confront it or flee from it (also known as the fight-or-flight response) but in extreme cases of fear (terror) a freeze or paralysis response is possible
I personally think that fear still is an oppropriate word given the above definition. But thats just me.
1 word? Nevertheless, a very important word in the bdsm world.
Obviously I am going to have to be clearer here, because there are many on here that just don't understand and think they do because they order 'bitch, suck my cock' and slap the 'bitch' around and consider that they are into bdsm rather than be controlling or abusive - yes, I do know what I am talking about, I have read and rejected plenty of stories on here that disguise violence/torture as bdsm.
Already there have been two posts from sprite and TheDevilsWeakness discussing abusive bdsm relationships - the very thing I was afraid of. Someone who may be interested in bdsm is going to walk in here, then walk straight out assuming that is what bdsm is about.
I knew straight away after reading the heading the direction this topic was going to take. We are not allowed to discuss abusive relationships or domestic violence, yet this topic was asking you to discuss your fears - allowing and inviting that subject to be brought up - which it has. And it is left open to discuss such things which I will talk about in a minute at the end.
Dude, I like you and have always admired your witty posts but really, you don't need to explain to me or give me the definition of fear - I am not stupid - that is insulting, but thank you for posting it as it does prove my point - it says in the fear definition words like, distressing, threat, negative, danger, confront and flee, terror - all which is not what bdsm is about which has been my point from post one.
Yes, there is always trepidation/concern/fears about well, everything, but I don't see topics such as what are your fears entering a lesbian/straight/gay relationship??? and I still don't feel it belongs in the bdsm section especially when it discusses 'getting hurt emotionally' and that dreaded word - fear. One member made a joke in another post which caused outrage and everything posted was removed as they worried it would cause a negative feeling towards bdsm, yet then start a topic about fear which according to dude's definition even uses the word negative
Yet, I hope this topic remains here and not removed as it could be interesting and informative to newbies. If you still think I am being petty or causing drama, or whatever, let me explain one more thing why I don't like the word fear to be mixed in with bdsm.
In the real world, there is part of bdsm that many, like me, are against and ashamed of and do not wish to be associated with. It is called 'Fear Play' - which is really torture. The dom/domme uses the subs most inner fears against them. For example, if the sub has a strong fear of spiders, the dom would place spiders on them etc scaring the poor subs to death. If they have a fear of water, the dom would continuously dunk their head into buckets of water. Everything that is against lush rules, would be used, suffocation, knife play etc., in other words - torture and violence.
I personally think that fear still is NOT an appropriate word given the above definition. But that's just me.
I'm signing off and going back to bed to recover, so I will not post in here anymore. I just hope that I have given a reasonable objective view to my dislike of the word fear and would like for anyone to read this to understand that you can have a wonderful exciting funfilled, cum in bucket loads bdsm lifestyle without any FEAR.
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Quote by sprite
i am going to have to respectfully disagree here. entering ANY relationship, it's normal to have a little fear and insecurity attached. Now, if it's overwhelming, then yeah, you probably don't belong, and your excitement and desire should outweigh it and push it aside, but honestly, if this is NEW to you, then it can be a little scary, just like anything new.
Yes sprite and dude, I do understand and respect what you are saying - yes it is human to feel nervous entering a new relationship, but fear???.
What I don't understand is (a) the point of this topic because really, if you are going to enter into any relationship with the fear that you are going to be hurt emotionally, not only is that being very pessimistic, but the relationship is doomed from the get go.
(b) If we are going to insist and discuss fears of entering a new relationship, I think it should be discussed in the relationship section because what I am trying to stress, is that this topic is putting bdsm into the negative view by putting fear and bdsm together because some don't understand the true lifestyle and that is my true fear.
Sorry, but it was asked of what is my opinion and this is my opinion and maybe I should post my opinions elsewhere that discusses true bdsm. Good luck in scaring people away from a truly wonderful and exciting lifestyle.
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Quote by Dudealicious
Question for you then, if it's a Dom / Domme's job to push their sub, a safe word is usually established. From your response, no fear should be prevalent correct? Therefore I would magine without fear you would not have to adopt a safe word (or gesture) then?
Just curious.
We are human and fears always will lie in our thoughts in some way, at times they may show in different ways.
Not correct. A safe word (or gesture) is always established prior to starting the agreement. It is given, not because a person is afraid, but because everyone has limitations. If pushed past that limitation, then the safety word is used.
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Quote by Dudealicious
I find your reply interesting. As humans don't we all have fears? These same fears actually manifest themselves in a "normal" relationship. No one wants to get hurt, however we trust our heart and the person we choose to enter the relationship in.
I agree with what Callisto posted, fear would be one of the biggest emotions that would come to mind for me. Especially seeing as you trust your partner emphatically, either as a Dom or sub. Giving that trust to someone (anyone) usually has fears attached to it. Just my two cents.
Sorry, I should have made myself clearer. I consider that there are different levels of bdsm. There are those that roleplay and whack on some nipple clamps, throw in a couple of slaps and claim that they live the lifestyle (they are to me, the kinkies), then there are those that willingly practically hand over their lives to their Master and only abide by Master's decisions - whether it be for an hour or for a lifetime. The latter for me is the truest form of the bdsm lifestyle and that is the one I am referring to. True bdsm, unlike the porn movies, often involves little or no sex. It involves control, teasing, humiliation, testing, a small degree of pain and depending on the agreement into the relationship, sex.
I agree that we all have fears, but bdsm and fear do not belong together. A slave should be willing, excited, wanting, desiring, and needing. To have fears, questions or doubts about entering a bdsm relationship says to me that they should not enter into one - unless of course, you are a kinkie and in that case, we should open another category for the kinkies and post these questions there, because to me - sorry if I am repeating myself
- it is VERY important that there should be no fear! 
Active Ink Slinger
Simple answer - If you have any fear regarding entering or being in a bdsm relationship, you shouldn't be in one
Before entering an agreement, it is important that it should be discussed between the Master and slave as what is to be expected by BOTH of them, emotionally and physically. If there are any doubts, walk away - you should never enter into something you feel may hurt you. Fear and BDSM should never be said in the same sentence, it must be all about trust.
If you are one of those that get emotionally attached too easily, you should never ever get involved in this sort of relationship as it could turn into an abusive relationship.
Before entering an agreement, it is important that it should be discussed between the Master and slave as what is to be expected by BOTH of them, emotionally and physically. If there are any doubts, walk away - you should never enter into something you feel may hurt you. Fear and BDSM should never be said in the same sentence, it must be all about trust.
If you are one of those that get emotionally attached too easily, you should never ever get involved in this sort of relationship as it could turn into an abusive relationship.
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Quote by johnnypow
sexual intercourse, including genital-genital, oral-genital, anal-genital, or oral-anal, whether between persons of the same or opposite sex;
;
masturbation; (b)
sadistic or masochistic abuse
explicit genital closeups (a)
this picture was of a woman holding a penis..........what was violated ?
The picture was one of (a) an erect penis which the woman was (b) holding/stroking. We do not allow it in the forums, or as avatars. You are of course, welcome to post these pictures on your own personal profile
Does that answer your question? 
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Quote by gav
So this setting works retrospectively across all your stories. Your scores will be hidden and available again if you untick this option.
This does not affect commenting, which can be turned off with a different setting.
Just because I haven't annoyed you for awhile
I noticed that charmbrights scores are still available to see on his profile but not in the story itself. Is that a little bug that you can see it in the profile or is that how it is meant to be?btw, thank you for giving us these options
Even fairer-er, have a permanent slot for the one and only Frank_Lee 
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Quote by secretcharm
what if he said "Fug me!" ?
or
Sorryforbeingawhineybitch!"
If he said "Fug me!", I think even I would stop and say a little prayer for him. Poor bastard, think the horns!
Sorryforbeingawhineybitch - well that deserves 'The Fug' for being so whiney!
Active Ink Slinger
My safe word/s are simple and varied -
Oh fuck, the husband (or wife) is home - guaranteed stopper
More - I insist on that one when I am feeling bitchy
or my favorite expression - Fuck me - again when I am feeling bitchy LOL
only joshing - I take the safe words very seriously (probably the only real thing I do) and as Wellmademale said, always have a back up using gestures just in case you're gagged, have a mouth full of cock, dildo etc.
Oh, I thought that was your cum scream, not safe word Sorry, next time I won't just stand back and laugh at you, I will pull out. You do have to admit though, it was pretty funny hearing you scream it over and over and .....
Oh fuck, the husband (or wife) is home - guaranteed stopper
More - I insist on that one when I am feeling bitchy
or my favorite expression - Fuck me - again when I am feeling bitchy LOL
only joshing - I take the safe words very seriously (probably the only real thing I do) and as Wellmademale said, always have a back up using gestures just in case you're gagged, have a mouth full of cock, dildo etc.
Quote by Buz
My safe word is, "Hoochiecoochiemamameiaholycowmuthafucka!"
Oh, I thought that was your cum scream, not safe word
Sorry, next time I won't just stand back and laugh at you, I will pull out. You do have to admit though, it was pretty funny hearing you scream it over and over and ..... 
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Quote by beowulf69
I had someone send me one of these requests. I responded that I would love to do so and let them know that I also had a new story, my first ever, and asked them to do the same. I gave her a great vote and a great comment but she must have thought she was too good to do the same for me. I discovered that one can delete their comment from a story and delete someone from their friends list. Delete! Delete!
If you have me on your friends list then treat me like a friend! That is not too much to ask! I will treat you good right back.
I'm going to play the devils advocate and yes, that is too much to ask. A friend should not be expected nor feel obligated to vote. A friend is simply that, a friend - and should not be just considered a friend for doing something in return.
If I sent out a request (never would really, hate them with a passion) and got a reply back something like 'sure but as long as you vote on mine', not only would I not vote on theirs, but hope they wouldn't even bother voting on mine.
As stated, there are a thousand and one reasons why a person may not vote on your story - Time, category, maybe felt harassed into voting by messages etc, or it may be a case they simply don't like your style of writing, didn't turn them on, and is being generous by not giving you a low vote.
I vote on a story because I loved and enjoyed the story immensely and felt it deserved a vote, but refuse to vote on a story after being told to. I love receiving the comments on my stories because I didn't ask for them - it just makes them even more that special. If I had asked, I would not be sure if they were genuine or just courteous friends comments.
As for the delete - I'm not sure that a member can delete a comment (I can't test this out personally, as I have mod powers). To my knowledge, the only way for a comment to disappear from a story is for them to delete their account - once someone disappears from the database, so do all their comments and votes. As for deleting from their friends list - sorry but that is their privilege and there may be another reason for doing so.
EDIT: Okay, a very sexy buz just told me that it is possible to delete your own comment
Thank you 
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Quote by elitfromnorth
Hi, I'm elit and I'm a pervert. *waits for the rest of the room to go Hello, Elit* I've been fantasising about light bondage and domination for a year now. *waits for the applause*
=d> =d> =d> =d> =d> =d>
Hello elit, I'm Fugs and I have been wanting to dominate your
since I first met you - but alas, you have a gorgeous girlfriend, so I just fantasize about it. Hello, I am Fugs and I am a Mistress. I have one slave in real life and would like to have a certain two at Lush when the timing is right.
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Quote by PersonalAssistant
y'all sound like you are saying hello at an AA meeting (actually I know more about GA than AA)
Will there be a cure?
Well maybe I should fuck out too, because when I read PA's first post, I read the beginning and laughed and thought that yes, it did sound that way - a lot. I did not think that it was a personal jab at bdsm.
Quote by jerseylynn
Alright enough with the drama..Either post in a serious way or get the fuck out..enough!!
But I did think that was a tad personal.