Now Dan really lived up to his name
His dick bringing fortune and fame
Mary Lou bought a new van
But she needed a nice new man
Dipsticks she checked
Short ones she'd reject
A coquette from Kalamazoo
Coated her nipples with glue
Then added some bangles
Mixed in some spangles
A cranky old man named Peter
Had a tongue like a Giant Anteater
He then found work
And it sent him berserk
Licking the House Majority Leader
A coquette from Kalamazoo
An obstinate gal from Oakland
Tried it with only her left hand
Little Miss Mary was often contrary
The little bitch could really get scary
Never satisfied
Unless she's astride
Little Miss Mary was often contrary
The little bitch could really get scary
They passed around sunscreen for all
Helping each other was a ball
Was so mystifying
And so gratifying
The women from Leeds came a running
Heard there were nude women sunning
"Free range" beavers
All high achievers
The assembly ever so stunning
They passed around sunscreen for all
The women from Leeds came a running
Heard there were nude women sunning
"Free range" beavers
There once was a lecherous teacher
Who was quite the habitual creature
He'd diddle the girls
While his dick he unfurls
One more twist and he'll go into seizure
The women from Leeds came a running
There once was a lecherous teacher
Who was quite the habitual creature
He'd diddle the girls
A shy little coed from Cinci
fell in love with a guy named Quincy
He pulled out his trumpet
For that sweet little strumpet
Her response a little bit chintzy
There once was a lecherous teacher
Little Jack Horner liked BDSM
'Specially when he dressed en femme
His Mistress sat him in the corner
While she flogged his boner
As a clit it was really a gem
A shy little coed from Cinci
Little Jack Horner liked BDSM
'Specially when he dressed en femme
A tall lady with a big fat bum
Looked like a rugby scrum
But she was quite proud
And enjoyed being ploughed
A tall lady with a big fat bum
Looked like a rugby scrum
A guy from Australia went jogging
While part of his anatomy flogging
The ladies watched on
Jack and Jill went up the hill
To have a threesome with Bill
Jill on all fours
Little Bo Peep was a bit of a floozie
Was quite the slut and acted quite woozy
Dizzy from shagging
Her cute ass a-wagging
Regretting not being more choosy
Jack and Jill went up the hill
Little Bo Peep was a bit of a floozie
Was quite the slut and acted quite woozy
Dizzy from shagging
In her cupboard, old mother Hubbard
Hit her head on a shelf and blubbered
But her mate had a "boner"
He wanted to loan her
"Not for rent" she was heard to have uttered
Little Bo Peep was a bit of a floozie
Little Miss Muffet, you know
Knelt by her tufet to bestow
Mary had a little lamb
Who always got into a jamb
Humping whatever
Her apron only covered her front
With lace just below her cunt
But I had in mind
What was behind
Happy to attend to the hunt
Mary had a little lamb
Her apron only covered her front
With lace just below her cunt
I dated a short-order cook
She had grease in every last nook
Stuck my finger in her pie
Hardly bone dry
Three men, a woman and a bed
Enjoyed the pulleys and chains overhead
Paddles, whips and more
Tied spread-eagle on the floor
Three men, a woman and a bed
enjoyed the pulleys and chains overhead
Her panties were long since removed
What she did with her fingers was lewd
On stage at The Met
Without breaking a sweat
