PhilU's Profile

6 Jun 2018

Quote by sprite

12) the i have a goddamned headache listening to you motherfuckers bitching about everything block - only usable by sprite. blocks every single post on the entire site.

Meh. I have one of those too... I just press that little 'x' on the edge of the lush tab. Some people should try it occasionally...

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31 May 2018

Quote by RumpleForeskin

PhilU's entry has well over 10 comments so he should be in good shape, vote-wise.

Yes, thanks for the extra pimping there, Bill. And thanks to all those who have checked it out. Good luck to all the Rumplations regulars (and irregulars) who entered. I'll make an outrageous tip - there'll be a first-time winner this time (unless I'm missing someone, I don't think that any previous comp winners have entered this time).

Quote by Milik_the_Red
Ill have whatever Bertha still has concentrated in the depths of its artificial soul. Im in that interminable wait while chapter 2 my Theia Chronicles is moderated. Why can't these people be up at 4 am just in case I post something?

We have mods in many different time zones so we could, in theory, have you covered. Unfortunately, some of the mods are a bit lazy...

And with that, I'm off to bed. Maybe just time for a nightcap... maybe beer?

[I think your story should be up soon, Milik]

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30 May 2018

Quote by Jimwillhavefun

Hello Mr Phil.

I am working my way through the last few stories in the comp. I will get to yours a little later tonight. But as you know I am sure, those of us that entered can not help you with votes. They will be stripped away as soon as the mods and counsel get their hands on the stories. I will of course leave a nice comment as soon as I read it. I am sure it is very good coming from you. Good luck in the comp.

Why thank you Mr Jim. It was my understanding that all votes count for the first hurdle and only after that do votes from fellow competitors get stripped out before looking at average scores (so people can't tactically vote down stories they think might beat them... although I'm sure almost no one on this site would do such a thing).

If so, then I've cleared the first hurdle, thanks to Verbal and ITM. So their drinks are on me... actually, drinks all around. But I'd better just have coffee. And I'm going to try to read all the comp entries... Just made a late start to reading then.

Of course, I could be wrong. I'm just the most junior of junior mods, so I don't know much, but I know I love sprite...

*runs for cover*

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30 May 2018

Quote by curvygalore

Hello everyone! *waves*

Do take a look at Phil's story. [Some snipping because I'm pretending to be modest] Although due to his one-liner I've been humming Bohemian Rhapsody to myself all evening.

I felt so bad about that, that I made a signature to counteract it. Does it help? evil4

Anyway, thanks so much to those who have already checked it out. Currently at 9 votes. I'm obviously too proud to beg, but... (dropping onto his knees) please, please, please... icon_smile

Ahem... Anyway, while I'm here, beer me please, Bill. occasion5

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29 May 2018

Quote by Milik_the_Red

Hey Phil, we haven’t had much of a chance to get to know one another, but I’ve seen you around for awhile. I’m going to give your story a spin, it sounds like a good one

I’ll have a cold one. I’m off today so what the hell. I’m hoping to talk my wife into going down to Hollywood tonight just to see the sights

Hi Milik,

Thanks for giving the story a spin and for leaving such a nice comment. I've certainly seen you around, and checked out (and enjoyed) a couple of your stories. One day I'll get to your back catalogue. Or maybe one month... it'll probably take much more than a day.

And belated congratulations to you and Simplicity... hope all is still going smoothly despite the 'bar room incident'.

Quote by curvygalore

Hello everyone! *waves*

Do take a look at Phil's story. He's probably already sick of me saying it's bloody briiliant! Although due to his one-liner I've been humming Bohemian Rhapsody to myself all evening.

I'm sure I can fit in a beer before bedtime since I'm here...

Well, I suppose I can cope with a little bit more flattery... although you might be raising people's expectations a little too high. And apologies for the one-liner... I couldn't think of anything better. If it makes you feel better, I've had it stuck in my head too and I can't even blame anyone else!

Quote by browncoffee

I'm so amazed that Phil entered the competition. I'm going to get to everyone's entries asap.

Ugh back to work today.

Oh ye of little faith. I always come through in the end (heh... oops, sorry Verbal), don't I? Well, except when I don't.

Enjoy your day at work... it's beer o'clock here. evil4

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28 May 2018

Morning all. Long time no see for some of you, and for others... hello, nice to meet you. hello2

Now, I don't want you to think that I only drop by when I want something. In fact, this time, I want two things.

Firstly, a coffee that is strong, black and fit for human consumption. Although, as a great philosopher once said, two out of three aint bad. You see, I was up late trying to finally wrangle a story into order and get it to line up with my idea of how it was supposed to look. Then I gave up and posted it anyway. Which brings me to...

Secondly, I kinda entered the comp at something approaching the last minute. Nothing quite like my effort last time (well, last time the comp didn't involve that po-tree stuff), but still a bit late. (What can I say? Deadlines are motivating for me...) Anyway, if anyone has the time and inclination, then some votes on https://www.lushstories.com/stories/fantasy-scifi/welcome-to-reality.aspx would be really nice.

Thanks!

And then I should catch up on a little bit of reading... Hmm, make that coffee extra large, please Bill!

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8 May 2018

Quote by Green_Man

I am not quite sure, Jeff. Are you creating a story for the competition, or just a story that you want tell right now?

I put a lot of effort into some stories, and no so much in others. But I do have my competition entry out there. It has it's needed ten scores so it is ready to be judged.

There were only thirteen entries the last I checked. I was lucky enough to be number 13. And familiar folks from the Bar are sparse in the comp.

I'm getting into bed at the moment. No need for a drink, Rump.

There's still more than three weeks to go in the comp, so everyone's got plenty of time still to get their entries in. So, get writing everyone! (Do as I say, not as I do).

*Dives behind the bar, hoping that Hannah hasn't spotted him.*

Beer please, Bill. Actually, maybe I'll just grab one myself while I'm hiding here...

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1 May 2018

Oh Nicola, how could you?!?

The puns, I mean. d'oh!

The decision is an excellent one.

Congrats Hannah!

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1 May 2018

Quote by Buz

Surely you jest. I think you're pulling our leg. Women make a lot more noise than men during sex. I think you're just trying to get amusing responses.

Either that or Jack is onto something about the chloroform.

Yes, as a general rule they do, and there's lots of fascinating theories on why - see https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Female_copulatory_vocalizations

However, discussing such theories, or even using the phrase "female copulatory vocalization", in bed is perhaps not the best way to turn on your partner. Or so I've heard...

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15 Apr 2018

Quote by LYFBUZ
serving drinks to innocent bathers

Where do you propose to find innocent bathers around here?

While you look for some, maybe I'll just take some drinks to the not-at-all-innocent bathers... laughing6

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15 Apr 2018

Quote by sprite
fyi? i voted for the Fuck You PhilU song. it's really catchy! had me singing it in the shower.

FYI - I'm not surprised. I'm also not surprised that it's leading the voting. But I'm not so vain that I think that the song is about me - just a pure coincidence, I'm sure.

Quote by seeker4
It's not the first time Mac have had internal squabbles so this is a bit of yawner IMO. But Neil Finn? The brilliant writer/singer of Crowded House as well as part of Split Enz and the Finn Brothers? Hell, no. Don't get me wrong. Neil's got the vocal chops for it. But he's got such a wonderful back catalogue of his own, why the hell would I want to hear him sing somebody else's?

Yeah, this was probably my main reaction. Why would he want to commit a fair chunk of time to playing other people's songs, presumably however Mick Fleetwood tells him to?

But maybe he secretly fancies Stevie Nicks? And maybe his wife has a thing for Mick? Stranger things have happened... although this might be (a very young) Neil's opinion on it:

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14 Apr 2018

The strangest entertainment news for the week was that the lead singer and guitarist from the great Australian (okay, he's a Kiwi, but we still claim them) band Crowded House will join Fleetwood Mac for a tour, after Lindsey Buckingham was (reportedly) sacked.

*Little known fact - this is the working title of the jam they did together.

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13 Apr 2018

Quote by Denim_Daisy10
Coffee please ...
Mother nature needs to make up her mind sheesh ...72°F yesterday on my hill &52°F windy as fuck today

Hmm, 72F is almost as warm as the min temp here last night. The max was 35C (~95F) a couple of days ago... who stole our autumn?!?

Quote by browncoffee

I have the storyline!! I just can't write it! Thank you all the same for your generosity.

Yep, I know how that goes. Although I have storylines and random scenes that I actually quite like. It's the bits in between, that make those scenes make the slightest bit of sense anywhere other than in my own head, where I'm having trouble. Maybe when it's cooler I'll sit down and write (oooh, I've found a new procrastination excuse).

Coffee please, Bill, and good to hear a little about your polypless insides (may not need to know any more details though).

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12 Apr 2018

Quote by browncoffee
Têa, please. I so want to write a story but I just can't find the words!!! How are you all? I don't get the sports banter. I need the French open to start!

I found lots of words:

I've done the hard bit, now you just have to put them in a different order. evil4

I never quite got into the rebooted Dr Who, but growing up, it was always The Goodies and then Dr Who in the evenings... Tom Baker was definitely the best!

Anyway, it's beer o'clock here, so a beer please, Bill. Hi to all the patrons, new and not-quite-so-new, young and not-quite-so-young...

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9 Apr 2018

I know you haven't tried anything like this before, but you never know - you just might like it!

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9 Apr 2018

Quote by kiera
I don't have an accent.

You have one of the strongest non-accents that I've ever heard... laughing8

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8 Apr 2018

Quote by Lauradj
"I'll have seconds!"

"Are you sure you'll be able to fit it all in?"

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6 Apr 2018

Quote by SereneProdigy

Question: Can you English speakers spot the difference between the French accent from either France or Quebec? It's always pretty fucking obvious to me...

I had two teachers in high school French lessons - one who was born in France, and one from Quebec. Their accents did sound quite different in English and en francais. And my accent while speaking French (badly) is part France, part Quebec and (the largest) part just plain awful.

I don't have an accent when speaking English. Okay, maybe just a little bit strine (i.e. an accent where "Australian" can be made to sound like "strine").

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5 Apr 2018

Quote by Jimwillhavefun

Thanks buddy. I forget where I was posting it.

No worries mate. Actually, we probably both should be posting in the Think Tank. At least, that's where I usually go when I feel like totally failing to change anyone's opinion on guns...

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5 Apr 2018

Quote by Jimwillhavefun

Fixed that for you...

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3 Apr 2018

Quote by nicola
Bronte in Sydney.

Anyone who thinks Bondi is the best Sydney beach, has been in the sun too long.

I agree that Bronte is better than Bondi. But I prefer Manly to both of them.

Although all Sydney beaches tend to be overcrowded, and the sand is a bit yellow for my liking (I'm a beach snob laughing6

), so I tend to prefer beaches out of town. I won't say where, because last time I mentioned my favourite, the place was overrun with women searching for "some super-sexy guy called Phil". All the local women complained greatly; most of the local men just said, "G'day, I'm Phil."

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2 Apr 2018

Quote by Jimwillhavefun
Search Results For
pregnant
advanced search
Sort results by:Found 2473 result(s)

And that is just with the word in it somewhere. I think maybe people like it more than we think.

Yes, that is with the word in the story anywhere. Who knows how many are in the backstory - "I didn't love her but she fell pregnant, so we got married..." Or as a possibility in the future, "Oh yes, you stud, make me pregnant." Or even, "After a pregnant pause, she agreed."

Incidentally, https://tags.lushstories.com/pregnant gives 115 stories with that tag, and there are 92 with pregnancy tagged. So yeah, there's some interest. Not sure it needs its own category, though...

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31 Mar 2018

Reviving this somewhat-less-than-successful thread, since I heard this one from 1967 for the first time today, and kinda like it...

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30 Mar 2018

Quote by silveranode

My own thoughts for the day are, that if only one, two or three members of the team are guilty, then they're all guilty.
And the Coach didn't know! Oh! Come on! I know ten (10) year olds that can tell better 'Porkies'.
Heavy hangs the head of shame for the 'Baggy Green'.

I am also of the opinion that the coach knew, and probably most of the players. And of the opinion that, if you're going to 'come clean and confess' then it's a good idea to actually tell the whole truth (sandpaper and tape are quite different), or else people begin to wonder about other statements, like, 'this is the first time we've done anything like this'. But the penalties do seem pretty harsh compared to similar offences from other teams in the past.

I'm also of the opinion that the majority of people on Lush probably have no idea what we're talking about, and even less concern about it...

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30 Mar 2018

My opinion is that everyone is entitled to their own opinion, but not to their own facts. And that not all opinions are created equal - sometimes the opinion of someone very bright and highly educated in an area, based on a careful analysis of actual statistics, is actually more worthy of attention than that of some random person on a website, based on a gut feeling...

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30 Mar 2018

Quote by Green_Man

I have added PDFs to all of the stories I posted above, earlier. Just to make it easy for anyone interested. I went ahead and included a PDF for the entire collection of short stories by Flannery O'Connor that begins with A Good Man Is Hard to Find.

I am still awaiting approval of a story I submitted here over 20 hours ago. That's the longest I've waited for verification in years. They must be extremely busy with the judging going on for the competition.

By the way, Shirley Jackson has a large body of work for a lady who passed away young. In her 40s I think. Extremely entertaining. She didn't limit herself to any genre. She's one of my favorite all-time authors.

More java, please, Rump man. Thanks, for everything.

Some of the more senior mods may have been busy judging comp entries. I've heard a rumour that some of the more junior mods may have been busy doing other things.

Like work for example... Liar

By the way, has anyone ever noticed that we have two emojis for that 'cheers' thing (one on page 2 and one on page 4)?

One day, I'll catch up on all the short story recommendations here - thanks one and all for the contributions. And on my reading queue...

I doubt I'll catch up on all the baseball talk, not least because footy season is underway here. Although everyone's still talking about cricket - just not in a good way angry7

In the meantime, for something completely different - could I have a beer, please Bill? Oh, and congrats on the competition success!

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25 Mar 2018

Quote by gav

Those were the days!

Oh, and thanks Gav for getting things back and up and working (more or less) on schedule smile

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22 Mar 2018

Evening all,

Hope everyone's prepared for the shock of no Lush... remember "up to" 12 hours, so maybe it will be less than that (*crosses fingers... and struggles to type for a while*)

Quote by RumpleForeskin
Just for the record: Best I can tell, this is the situation for Thursday, March 22...probably.

From: Gav
Location: Sydney

We need to upgrade the storage engines in the database and media store. We have ~1tb of data to backup and restore so its expected to take up to 12 hours.

This is scheduled for 14:00 Pacific Time, Thursday, March 22.

Added info: that'll be about:

2:00 pm on the US west coast
5:00 pm on the US east coast,
9:00 pm in the UK
and the break of dawn in Sydney (where it'll be Friday morning).

Without wanting to be pedantic... ah, who am I kidding? I love being pedantic. It will be 8am Sydney time, while dawn is supposed to be at 6:35am (otherwise known as TFE, or too damn early). But I should get time to check Lush in the morning, but then I might actually have to do some work during the day. sad3

Quote by Ping

I find these tidbits equally astonishing:
Stormdog's poem, The Game, is 1,132 words. I think that is the longest in the comp, not that size matters

Actually, KindOfHeart managed 1,282 words, so exactly 1,282 more words than I managed... Good luck to all those who did enter.

Now, I think I need a beer, if anyone's behind the bar (so hard to keep up with barkeepers' schedules these days...)

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20 Mar 2018

I'm still offended by the final scene in Point Break (the original version with Keanu Reeves). It's supposed to be Bells Beach (on the south coast of Australia), which is a fairly straight beach with low cliffs with basically no trees to be seen. Instead, the movie gives a curved beach with hills and spruce trees (it was filmed in Oregon). I'm sure there are plenty of others, but that one just hit me at the time as - "Wow, you guys aren't even trying to make this look right..."

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19 Mar 2018

I went with slow build up, but I'll happily read good examples of the other approaches too. I think it comes down to what our own RumpleForeskin said on another thread recently...

"There is only one unbreakable rule for writing viable commercial fiction: Don't bore the reader."

True for not-so-commercial fiction too. As sprite and Verbal point out - you've got to grab the reader. On Lush, you have a few lines to convince a potential reader that they should click and a few more paragraphs before they make a decision about whether to read on or click on something else. Don't bore them... and that includes with a pretty standard sex scene. I often skim-read sex scenes on here - IMHO, the build-up can be more interesting than the actual act (at least in writing...)

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