Join the best erotica focused adult social network now
Login
RumpleForeskin
Over 90 days ago
Straight Male, 79
0 miles · Phoenix
Profile Stories
43
Ebooks Friends
61
Follows
84
Forum
6.7k
Groups
1

Forum
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
First 'thangs' first -- Scott you got the spelling of 'y'all' absolutely perfect. Truth be told, about the only folks down here who spell it 'ya'll' come from North Carolina. Not sure why but they seem to be stuck on that mis-spelling. When it comes to pronunciation, in my neck of the woods it sounds like 'yawl' (a two-masted sailing ship similar to a ketch. As usual, TG is correct about the redundant if oft used 'all y'all'.

At the rate things are going, I'll just put a fresh bottle of Buffalo Trace on the bar and hope for the best while anticipating the worst. Anybody else need something of a fluid nature?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings, HUGS, and a big Happy Birthday to the old US of A. Not sure how we've made it this far, but it's been 244 years now so we must either be damn lucky or doing something right, some how. Maybe a combination of ingredients product.

Thanks to Martin and Curvy for the good wishes and to Ms C. for popping in like the proverbial 4th of July firecracker and getting things going with a bang.

The contest entry count is at 27. Hunch-wise, odds are it'll end up in the the mid30's.

Time has come to fill my mug to the brim with the fine product of Curvy and Big Bertha's efforts, grab one or maybe two brownies and join Coma and Tose to wait on more Rumplators to come dragging in while we discuss whether pro sports teams over here with native-American nicknames should change them and if so, to what. Feel free to grab some sort of fluid and pull up a chair.
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings and a glorious 4th of July eve to one and/or all. With the folks up in Canada having shown the way to celebrate and survive an independence day, there's hope we 'Mericanos can handle tomorrow as successfully.

Contest entries are now up to 27, more or less. Rembember to read, comment and then vote early and often.

Massive HUGS to all, especially those who can find the time to share and care.

A mug of the finest product of Big Bertha's and Tonya's efforts are calling me as is some combination of Curvy's brownies and Carl's doughnuts. Anybody else need some of the good stuff?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Evening, y'all. The Gila Monsters and scorpions have knocked off for the day and the coyotes are, no doubt, tuning up. Just for the record I can't be sure since they seem to avoid the east Phoenix area here in the valley and besides, with my headphones oon it'd be tough to hear anything unless they were next door.

Carl didn't specify what he wanted to drink so I'll try a fresh bottle of Buffalo Trace and put an empty glass nearby and then back up.

Larry, here's your coffee. Don't be no fool--stay cool. ;)

Three Tailgaters coming up for Sarah, Seeker, and me. Anybody else need a drink?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings and HUGS to all who enter.

Both Vanessa and Green Man (Larry) have new contest entries. Both are love stories and both are, to no one's surprise, damn good. Check 'em out along with TG's early entry. Also on the might be worth a look list are the entries by Dark Side and Tam's Back.

The temp just hit 100f out here in the desert with more heat forecast. Of course, that's always a safe bet this time of year.

Me, I think triple digits calls for a Tailgater, maybe two. So whadda the rest of youse guys wanna drink? Any doughnuts left?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings on what appears to be a hump day hiatus for the morning crew. No problem, well, except for me since I've been sweating like a rushing race horse getting Big Bertha done the right way, throwing away the giant economy size and now empty bottle of NyQuil. Sure hope it did Vanessa some good plus other duties as unassigned.

Anyway, Big Bertha's hot to trot, and the tea kettle is ready to be of service. For breakfast snacks we have a fresh shipment of fried pork skins and some jalepeno poppers just waiting to do their 'thang' on your innards.

The contest entry count is now up to something in the mid-twenties (yeah, I forgot the exact number).

our world infamous lineup of bleers, whines and the always popular fine lickers is also available. So whadda y'all wanna drink?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings and massive cyber HUGS to all who join in this bon voyage party for the last day of June. This is just IMO, you understand, but its been some time since we've had so many 'good news' posts show up. Keep on keeping on, Rumplators.

There are 19 contest entries. Seems to be several from 'fresh' faces.

Massive cyber HUGS and thanks to Tonya, Curvy, and Big Bertha along wits a big 'atta boy' to Carl for his contributions.

Gil and Martin are on streaks of strong positivity. You two feel free to share some of that with the rest of us.

Hey, Scott, I tried that 'dancing in the rain' deal one time. Didn't get arrested for indecent exposure but ended up being charged with disgusting display. ;)

Coffee's calling. Anybody else need some of the 'finest kind' fluids and/or goodies available?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings and best wishes to all for a, well, maybe a more or less endurable, 'Moanday'.

Many thanks to Tonya for today's set-up and for 'Moanday'. Curvy, what you've just did, odds are you done did it real good. Many thanks. ;)

Not sure what the contest entry total is today since in my busy, hectic morning routine I sorta forgot to check. But the deadline is, as they tend to do, quickly approaching.

Which brings to mind what the great Douglas Adams said about deadlines: "I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by."

Today is the last Moanday in June. A celebration of that momentous event would, therefore, seem to be in order. A mug of Big Bertha's blessed brew enhanced with a shot of Beaver Breath Brandy, along with a couple brownies, sounds like a celebratory goodness. Anybody else need some of this good stuff?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings and HUGS to all who have made this place what it was, what it is, and what it'll probably end up being.

A multitude of HUGS and thanks to Curvy for getting things rolling. (slurp) Great coffee.

Hi ya, Susie. forensic tests on the lipstick stains left on the mugs point the fickle finger of fate toward you and the Unquenchable Curvy. But we loves ya both.

As for Martin, you'd think he'd have learned by now that the wet-head is dead, fashion-wise. However, wet t-shirts are always in good taste.

Time to stop talking and start drinking. Big Bertha's coffee is calling me. Anybody else have liquid needs.
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
It's nice to know somethings never change. After 1500 pages, the first post on page 1500 is a dang double-post. Nice to know some traditions have survived these perilous times. ;)

Susie, you and Curvy ready for a refill on your beers? Anybody else wanna join them in celebrating this Rumplations milestone?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings and a big HUG to Tonya for what she's always been for the rest of us and for all she's now going through. HUGS

The contest entry count has reached 14 or thereabouts. Remember to read, comment and then vote early and often. ;)

Time for a refill of Big Bertha's blessed brew. With a couple of Curvy's brownies for breakfast, what more could an old degenerate want? Anybody else need some of this good stuff?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Martin -- MEGA-congrats on the job front and how things seem to be falling into place in your private affairs, so to speak. ;) Happy for you.

Verbal: so how did the reading go? Meant to pass this along yesterday but forgot (what else is new?) Before FDR would broadcast on radio one of his 'Fireside Chats', a Navy Corpsman would stop by and drain his sinuses. Just a FWIW factoid from Rumplations ancient historian.

The contest entry total is now twelve, or it was an hour or two ago.

HUGS are still a goodness, btw. One-armed cyber hugs are recommended for those with a drink in their off-hand. Speaking of drinks, who wants one?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings (he whispers) and a big thumbs up to Sarah for her spot on suggestion of double Tailgaters for whatever ails poor Vanessa. And the usual round of sincere plaudits to Curvy for getting Big Bertha and this place going w/o arousing (so to speak) our sleeping beauty.

Vanessa was so considerate for the rest of us by clinging to the hot nut dispenser for warmth and the protection afforded by Terrance.

Me, I'm gonna fill my mug to the brim with Big Bertha's blessed brew, grab a brownie or two and go sit out on the back porch and wait for the morning doves and pigeons to go bat-shit crazy at dawn. Yeah, I know, kicks just keep getting harder to find. Anybody else need a drink and/or wanna join me for a most Rumplations type of TGIF celebration?

eta: Hey Carl, why don't ya bring a stack of dem waffles out here along with a bowl of berries? Just a suggestion.

View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Please pardon my 'back to the original topic' threadjack of this most entertaining threadjack but just for the record, once upon a time, the Lush mobile feature displayed the number of stories in each category. This feature vanished early in the site revamping process. No great loss though I did enjoy checking on the numbers now and then.

You may now return to your original threadjack -- or not, it's a free site. ;)
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings and HUGS to all along with a special 'mercy buckets' (notice the sophisticated use of something vaguely resembling French?) to Carl for getting things going.

The contest entry count has just reached double digits. Check 'em all out, especially the ones by TG and Kimmie.

Thanks to Carl's hard work and Big Bertha's ability to recover from it, there is now coffee and hot water for tea along with a choice selection of doughnuts. Think I'll grab a mug full of coffee and a couple doughnuts then sit with Coma and Tose and try to figure out the new rules for the upcoming, abreviated baseball season. Anybody need a drink before the Rumplations 'brain drain' gets down to some serious cogitating?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
If, I say, 'IF' plans are afoot to consider changing the name of this cesspool of cultural degeneration, may I suggest, Curvelations? Granted, the question of whether that would constitute a compliment or insult to Ms Cynthia would, no doubt, involve a frank and open, possibly even long and heated, discussion of such an earth-shattering move. ;)

I'll drink to that, whatever it was. Anybody else need a drink?


BTW, for some time now, my title bar 'has shown 'Rumplations' being preceded by an 'a' then a space. In comparison to all the other weirdnesses in my account, that struck me as being way too minor to mention to Gav.
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings and a whole host of 'Hump Day' HUGS to all who enter and/or those who never seem to leave. ;)

Beers are on Verbal and Sarah, for it appears that baseball is coming back. It'll only be a 60 game season and not start until late July (maybe the 23rd) but it will be an honest-to-goodness team sport. On behalf of all baseball fanatics and those of us who are just casual fans, WAHOO!

The old linebacker 'Buz' has, over the years, given the rest of us first-rate (sexy and/or funny) baseball oriented stories. You could do a lot worse than taking the time to look up and read some of them, for instance: Triple Play, and The Bat Girl.

I'll drink to that. Anybody else need an energizer?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings and HUGS to all along with a special tip of the old sombrero to Ms Curvy for her set-up today.

There are nine entries so far in the new Lush 'Rainbows' writing contest. This includes a most worthy submission by TG .

There are a whole host of Rumplators who, at the moment, are dragging either physically or mentally and possibly both. To all of you, a most loving HUG.
At this rate, the next contest might need to require something of a hopeful, cheerful, positive outlook. Yeah, I know, that's a turn off for a lot of writers but think of it as being something to alleviate the massive black dog depression many of us are enduring.

Now to fill my mug to the brim, grab a brownie or two, play something inappropriate on the juke box and go discuss life, its consequences and inevitablities with Coma and Tose. Anybody want a drink first?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings, y'all. Thanks to the hard work of those what have done gone before me, all I have to do is fill my mug,with Big Bertha's blessed brew, grab a goody or two and try to post something a bit different.

While political comments here, by unspoken agreement are usually limited to a few pithy oaths and heart-felt obscenities, the new video posted on Trump's tweet link by the Lincoln Project just seemed perfect for the Rumplation faithfull. Me, I don't Tweet and My uTube connection is on the fritz so if anyone can post a link I'd be much obliged.

xxx

The Lincoln Project is out with a new ad in the aftermath of President Trump’s underwhelming Tulsa rally.

Says a female narrator: “Hey Donald… your rally in Tulsa was a flop. You’ve probably heard this before, but it was smaller than we expected — it sure wasn’t as big as you promised.”

The voice goes on to say Trump “can’t keep your polls up.”
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings and wishes for all Rumplators to have a day filled with hugs and good news. This is most especially directed at our Several regulars who are having more than their fair share of rough times these days.

BTW, there is no truth to the rumor that the Pen Man is taking on a part time job as a glow-in-the-dark nightlight. (If confused, check out his last post) ;)

Big Bertha has been given the works: sludge removed and set aside for those wanting a more potent caffine hit, then rinsed out and sandblasted to make sure all that bottom settlement had been dislodged, then after a fulsome supply of dark roast coffee and swamp water was provided, she got all turned on.

There is also a new case of Buffalo Trace plus the kettle is filled with hot water for our tea sippers plus the usual menu of unusual bleers, whines, and fine lickers. So whadda ya wanna drink?

HUGS
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Hi ya, Phil! As a 'Reform Druid' (we worship both trees and bushes) I can testify that for us, Kate Bush is a major goodness. ;)

So whadda ya wanna drink?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings gangsters and gangsterettes. Big Bertha has been given the full treatment and is now busy converting dark roast ground coffee and water from Bayou Teche into her world renowned ambrosia. The tea kettle is also cranked up and preparing a kettle-full (what else?) of hot water for our tea sippers. And for our off-beat Verbal, a six-pack of I.B.C. Root Beer in ice cold bottles.

Those semi-fresh doughnut holes someone left in a greasy bag on the bar yesterday morning are now a bit fewer in number but older by one day. Enjoy.

Coffee's ready! Think I'll fill my 'Deep Hole Fluid Injectors' mug to the brim, grab a doughnut hole or two and sit out on the back porch to wait for the sun to rise and shine. Who knows, Tawny might even take an early morning or maybe late-night skinny- dip in the dumpster hot tub. Anybody wanna join in the fun?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings to all lusting to celebrate this TGIF-type HUGGA-BUNCH Friday here in the very heart(burn) of Lushland.

Big Bertha has had her sludge removed and saved for those in need of a stronger caffine hit. However, she's now turning dark roast Louisiana coffee and bayou water into coffee so approach with caution. The tea kettle is full of water from the same bayou and kettling to the benefit of our tea sippers.

Got a bag full of semi-fresh doughnut holes. Tawny must of had a good evening.

Also and in addition, there are a few unopened bags of breakfast pork skins available for those looking for an even less healthy item to start the day.

Verbal, be a good patient. Just remember, nurses call the shots.

Now for some of Big Bertha's blessed brew and a bag of breakfast pork skins to start the day the Rumplations way. Anybody else need a drink?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings and massive HUGS to all who enter. Many thanks to Carl and Big Bertha for all the first-rate hot caffinated fluids.

Vanessa, my spouse has ridden on the back of an elephant and my first-born has petted a tiger but so far I've never been bitten by a zebra.

Martin, here's hoping the upbeat news keeps coming for you. Not sure what you've done to deserve both it and Ms Ines, but here's to keeping both going.

Let there be baseball and may it soon be joined by football.

Now let us fill our chalices to the brim with Big Bertha's elexir of life and await the dawn. Anybody else need a drink?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
(Rumple stumbles in, forgets to turn on the lights, again, makes it to Big Bertha which (who?) is soon benefiting from his attention with her sludge set aside for the serious caffine -aholics among us, then puts water on for the tea sippers, opens a bag of breakfast pork skins, remembers he hasn't turned-on Big Bertha, manages that, and waits for her to put out the goodies.)

Greetings and Hump Day HUGS to all who enter

A special Rumplations' hug to Vanessa who is enduring more than her fair share of travails.

Coffee's cooked. I'd hang around to inflict more breakfast blatherings upon any who enter but a mug full of coffee and a bag of breakfast pork skins calls for some back porch time while waiting for the sun to get it up, so to speak. Don't forget the Bleers, Whines, and fine lickers also available for those in need of even stronger relief from this world of woes. So whadda ya wanna drink?

s
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings and a big mega-congrats to all for having, presumably, survived Monday. Don't know about the rest of you, but I'm getting a tad weary acting plucky and keeping my upper lip stiff. (sigh)

Thanks to C&C (Curvy and Carl) for getting things going this morning. Brownies, doughnuts and Big Bertha's coffee sounds like the breakfast of champions to me.

By no power on, above or under the land of Lush, I hereby proclaim today, HUGS DAY. All posters will be expected to include a mega-hug or, even better, load of hugs for everybody else. Failure to obey this proclamation will result in the offender being given an unfair trial and convicted of first-degreeas offensiveness.

Scott, been meaning to ask how your daughter, the new RN is doing these days. We're all proud of her.

Now who else needs a drink?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings to all who enter seeking surcease from the sorrow that is Monday mourning. Thanks to Fuzzy (aka Carl, the hardest working man in Lushland) there's Big Bertha coffee, hot water for the tea sippers the usual lineup of whines, bleers and fine lickers plus doughnuts.

Hey Carl, after my first sip of coffee (many thanks) it occurred to me that an appropriate name for young 'No Name' might be 'Anon'

BTW, I'm still smiling at the thought of Kid Rock mopping floors. But thanks to the sound training the US Army provided me, I'm a whiz at the one-wheel buffer. ;)

Now having finished my first mug of Big Bertha's blessed bre, another is in my immediate future. Think I'll take it and a doughnut or two out to the back porch and wait for the pigeons and doves to go nuts at sunrise. Any of that tempting any of y'all?

.
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Here's your beer, Curvy. Sorry it took so long but that comedy routine by Ping and Martin or maybe Martin & Ping, with them ordering 20-year old wine in this joint, well, it was so funny I couldn't stop laughing. Those jokers are too much. ;)

Anybody else need a drink?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings fellow travelers here inside the warped walls and seldom functioning latrines of the good ship, Rumplations.

Martin, I'm happy for you and most sympathetic to Ines. ;)

No doubt it would be a blessing if Gav and company could come up with a way to block the 'Tank' for those trying to overcome its negative effects. Probably need to have at least two semi-responsible mods to agree before it could be unblocked since addicts will say damn near anything to get their fix.

Speaking of getting my 'fix', thanks to the efforts of Big Bertha an Curvy, my 'Deep Hole Fluid Injectors' mug is now filled with her blessed brew and about to be consumed (consumated?) along with several samples of Curvy's brownies. Anybody else want some of this good stuff?
View Post
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
Greetings of a TGIF nature to all who enter in search of a few good men and/or bad women but after checking out the inventory, settle for coffee, tea, and other fluids plus a few doughnuts. (A tip of the old sombrero to Carl.)

New contest! Scroll up a bit to check out Nic's announcement or go to Site Announcements or the contests page. I've done checked out all of those and none contained any hope for those of us with high aspirations but low talent levels. (sigh)

Still, I may already be out of the running for Lush contest glory, but a big mug of Big Bertha's blessed brew and one or two of Carl's doughnuts are prizes worth competing for. Anybody else wanna drink?
View Post