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She
Over 90 days ago
Lesbian Female, 38
0 miles · Seattle
Forum
Marx Sister
I mean, I don't think there's one answer to this question. Not all guys need to improve in any specific area, and no guy (nobody) is the same as another. That said, in general, it's been my experience with the demographic of dudes I have slept with, that they often get fixated on one thing during any given encounter - my mouth, my ass, etc. (occasionally my feet), and sometimes I wish more attention would be paid to my whole body.
Marx Sister
I mean, I think it would be weird to start thinking of the daughter as your own child. In the scenario that's laid out here, she's in her twenties, and a woman in her twenties does not need a new father, and does not get one by default when her mother starts dating seriously. If she has serious need or desire for a daddy, then... Well, then that's going to get weird in a hurry.
I would expect the mother in question would find it creepy - or aggressively not a turn on at the very least - that the dude in question is interested in her daughter. Don't date a mother and daughter at the same time, the problems you're going to cause yourself will not be worth it.
That said, if you break up with one, and the other is interested in you, you should totally go for it - provided you're a jackass who does not care about your ex's feelings.
I would expect the mother in question would find it creepy - or aggressively not a turn on at the very least - that the dude in question is interested in her daughter. Don't date a mother and daughter at the same time, the problems you're going to cause yourself will not be worth it.
That said, if you break up with one, and the other is interested in you, you should totally go for it - provided you're a jackass who does not care about your ex's feelings.
Marx Sister
Yeah, a good accent can be sexy. I am a bit pickier about accents on men (at least in terms of finding them sexy), but a Scottish, Irish, Swiss, or Danish accent is usually nice on a male voice. I am more flexible with what I find attractive in women in general, so accents in general work for me. French, British, Scottish, Aussie and Kiwi accents would be high on my list for what turns me on with women.
Now, I have a question. Why do accents turn us on? In my case I honestly have no clue. I just get tingly with the right voice, and accents often play a part.
Now, I have a question. Why do accents turn us on? In my case I honestly have no clue. I just get tingly with the right voice, and accents often play a part.
Marx Sister
This is just a thing douche-bros do. If you want the panties, ask, and you can possibly have them. If not, there's probably a reason - i.e., that particular woman does not want to share her underwear, or that pair of underwear is special for some reason. Might be her most comfortable pair of underwear. Anyway, this is a dick move, so please don't do it.
Marx Sister
Quote by LillyLush
It's about story scoring... presently most of the stories here get unreasonably high scores because of many reasons but most importantly because readers have no mechanism available to evaluate a story with good reason. Bias, irresponsibility, prejudice and sometimes fishy ways are being used to score a story... while scoring, readers should be able to take account of the plot, language, setting, style etc. separately... all such fundamentals of a story should be available to the readers to score distinctively one by one, say from score 1 to 5... This can be made available in a small table... It will reduce inflated scoring and likely to bring in realism in story rating. This may also lead to more objectivity in subsequent comments by the readers
So, I definitely agree with the bulk of what's been said to this thus far. I think I see what you're after though, so let me ask the following. What about a more elaborate feedback form that can be used as an option by those who care, but leave the existing system in place. We could put a button by the comment area that links to a page with a more complex scoring system, and a place to comment on each facet of the score we give.
If it takes off that would be awesome, and then we could modify the system further - changing the scoring to a like/dislike system, simplifying it some other way. If we wanted to integrate them into the existing system, we could even append the forms to the comment list, and allow them to collapse down (collapsed as default, obviously), so that anyone can see them, but the don't have a million years.
Now, I think it is a bit silly, but if we are still concerned about privacy for scores we could send the scoring section of it to the author anonymously. There are just so many holes in our current privacy screen that I'm not sure we even need to bother.
With all this in mind, I also accept RejectReality's point...
Quote by RejectReality
In the end, it was a lot of coding and data storage that amounted to no benefit, and it was removed.
So, I get it if the entire premise is just a nonstarter, but I love the idea and would be delighted to have the option to give proper feedback on stories.
Marx Sister
Well, once again, I'm poly, so this may be a slightly different answer than you're after.
First, it is important to realize that I don't 'share' my wife with anyone, but rather that she shares herself with men. I am pleased that she is happy with her male partners. If she were not, I would still think it is good she's dating, but I would be sad that one or more of her partners was not making her as happy as she or I would like them to - though it would not really be my business unless she made it so. Pretty sure she's okay sharing me with other ladies, too.
First, it is important to realize that I don't 'share' my wife with anyone, but rather that she shares herself with men. I am pleased that she is happy with her male partners. If she were not, I would still think it is good she's dating, but I would be sad that one or more of her partners was not making her as happy as she or I would like them to - though it would not really be my business unless she made it so. Pretty sure she's okay sharing me with other ladies, too.
Marx Sister
Well, even in a monogamous setting, no, I don't think this would bother me at all. To be fair, I am in a variety of poly relationships, so I may or may not be the demographic you're interested in hearing from. It has not bothered me when I have been in a monogamous partnership, though.
Marx Sister
This really depends. I don't think there is one answer to this question. I could be looking for a quickie before I go to sleep, rather than an all night sexathon. Maybe I am looking to fuck all night, and then I want us to go for as long as possible. Maybe we're out of the house, and have limited time, or we're at an event and the longer we take the more likely we get caught. My point is that there are lots of options and lots of factors which influence them.
Marx Sister
So, I agree with sprite, that being a bad sub is not the goal of a proper sub. If you would like to be punished in a fun and sexy way, that's sort of different from being punished as a sub. Now, I see that you put the term 'bad' in half quotes, which makes me assume that you are using the term 'punishment' kind of loosely. I would also like to reiterate the lovely sprite in the following statement:
This is a big deal. Though I don't identify as a lifestyle dom, I am very dominant with two of my partners, each of whom is a good girl. Sexually speaking, they submit to me in the moment, and what I want in that moment. If a partner does not satisfy a desire of mine in a moment, that is not something I would punish them for. Punishment comes if somebody fails to satisfy their instructions, and may look more like the withholding of pain and/or affection. Willfully misbehaving in general actually makes you kind of a bad sub, rather than a 'bad' sub, if that makes sense. If a partner misbehaves playfully (for example, playfully denying something I want), I might flog them, or restrain them or torture them with excessive orgasms, but if I want to actually punish them, I am more likely to do something like what sprite described:
This is a place where it is important to delineate between D/S play and D/S lifestyle. The reason being that punishment in a relationship where this dynamic is in play both in and out of the bedroom, punishment is rarely intended to create a feeling of gratification - sexual or otherwise - in the submissive party, but in fact to be a learning experience. Something like flogging is typically more of a reward than a punishment. Punishment could also be making a sub wait for their reward, or denying it to them until they complete their task correctly.
The dynamic in question is a complex one, and this answer is sort of hard to write without knowing if this is about play or lifestyle. The answer to your question also depends on what sort of punishment you have in mind. Next...
This is important. Even if you don't use a safeword or similar mechanism (which is advisable), you and he both need to have a clear understanding of what is good and what is bad. Furthermore, you need to know what signals that one of you has experienced too much of something. Safewords are an easy way to make things safer at the beginning. Other mechanisms are specific forms of physical touch - this is often useful in a situation where you might be gagged or otherwise rendered voiceless, but are not fully restrained. Hand signals are also a fine choice. Regardless, establish some way of indicating that you need what's happening to stop immediately.
Communication is key in this situation, as has been pointed out. Tell him what you want when you're not in scene. If you are not comfortable for any or multiple of the wide array of valid reasons, then I would recommend that you write down how you're feeling, so that you can collect your thoughts. In fact, I recommend this regardless, because organizing your ideas will make the conversation easier.
With all that in mind, go for it! I'm glad you met each other, now go have fun with each other.
Quote by sprite
you need to talk to him about your wants and needs, even if it's just for play - ANY sexual relationship relies on communication. how does he know what kind of punishment you crave?
This is a big deal. Though I don't identify as a lifestyle dom, I am very dominant with two of my partners, each of whom is a good girl. Sexually speaking, they submit to me in the moment, and what I want in that moment. If a partner does not satisfy a desire of mine in a moment, that is not something I would punish them for. Punishment comes if somebody fails to satisfy their instructions, and may look more like the withholding of pain and/or affection. Willfully misbehaving in general actually makes you kind of a bad sub, rather than a 'bad' sub, if that makes sense. If a partner misbehaves playfully (for example, playfully denying something I want), I might flog them, or restrain them or torture them with excessive orgasms, but if I want to actually punish them, I am more likely to do something like what sprite described:
Quote by sprite
for me, punishment means standing in the corner with my nose pressed to the wall for an extended period of time so that i can think about what i did wrong, how i disappointed my Mistress, and how to avoid a repeat performance.
This is a place where it is important to delineate between D/S play and D/S lifestyle. The reason being that punishment in a relationship where this dynamic is in play both in and out of the bedroom, punishment is rarely intended to create a feeling of gratification - sexual or otherwise - in the submissive party, but in fact to be a learning experience. Something like flogging is typically more of a reward than a punishment. Punishment could also be making a sub wait for their reward, or denying it to them until they complete their task correctly.
The dynamic in question is a complex one, and this answer is sort of hard to write without knowing if this is about play or lifestyle. The answer to your question also depends on what sort of punishment you have in mind. Next...
Quote by NOLAHotGal
BUT, first do y'all have a safe word or an understanding as to the limits of the punishment such as flogging.
This is important. Even if you don't use a safeword or similar mechanism (which is advisable), you and he both need to have a clear understanding of what is good and what is bad. Furthermore, you need to know what signals that one of you has experienced too much of something. Safewords are an easy way to make things safer at the beginning. Other mechanisms are specific forms of physical touch - this is often useful in a situation where you might be gagged or otherwise rendered voiceless, but are not fully restrained. Hand signals are also a fine choice. Regardless, establish some way of indicating that you need what's happening to stop immediately.
Communication is key in this situation, as has been pointed out. Tell him what you want when you're not in scene. If you are not comfortable for any or multiple of the wide array of valid reasons, then I would recommend that you write down how you're feeling, so that you can collect your thoughts. In fact, I recommend this regardless, because organizing your ideas will make the conversation easier.
With all that in mind, go for it! I'm glad you met each other, now go have fun with each other.
Marx Sister
I expect most of us with much of a sexual history probably have one or two moments we're not proud of. For me, the big one was a misunderstanding, which I still feel bad about. When I was eighteen or nineteen, (my first year in college, regardless) I had a thirty-one year old girlfriend (also a student). Turned out I was having an affair with a married woman whose husband was deployed in Iraq. Needless to say, he didn't take well to discovering that she and I were together. Fortunately, he didn't discover us... together, though.
