Active Ink Slinger
Ummm... not to "toot" my own horn or anything... but I AM the Champ
Join the best erotica focused adult social network now
Login
TheDevilsWeakness
Over 90 days ago
Straight Female
Canada
Forum
Active Ink Slinger
YIKES... No chili but if you want a game of tug-o-war... Thursday's are the day to go! 
Active Ink Slinger
After reading this thread awhile ago and looking at ginger in the grocery store in a totally new light...
I finally tried it this weekend.
I usually keep my ginger in the freezer because its easier to grate when cooking but this time I went shopping for fresh fingers.
Since I had some already in the freezer... I prepared 2 fingers - one from the fresh and one from the frozen - to alternate the sensations from the warm burn to the icy chill.
Would I do it again? Absolutely
Very intense. And my partner said he enjoyed doing it to me as well. He loves the taste of ginger.
Shopping for groceries will never be the same.
I finally tried it this weekend.
I usually keep my ginger in the freezer because its easier to grate when cooking but this time I went shopping for fresh fingers.
Since I had some already in the freezer... I prepared 2 fingers - one from the fresh and one from the frozen - to alternate the sensations from the warm burn to the icy chill.
Would I do it again? Absolutely
Very intense. And my partner said he enjoyed doing it to me as well. He loves the taste of ginger.
Shopping for groceries will never be the same.
Active Ink Slinger
About a 2. I'm too trusting. I take whatever they say at face value and it comes back and bites me in the ass later.
Like my fiance's girlfriend calling his phone and I answered it. Poker nights with the boys wasn't WITH the boys, if ya know what I mean...
Like my fiance's girlfriend calling his phone and I answered it. Poker nights with the boys wasn't WITH the boys, if ya know what I mean...
Active Ink Slinger
HAPPY BIRTHDAY BIG BOY!! 
I hope you have a GREAT Birthday!! 
Active Ink Slinger
I'm having the same issue... 14 stories started/drafted/plotted and I'm stuck on each one of them - your not alone.
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by MsYumm
such a ridiculous thread!
NO I have seen ridiculous... this one was well meaning.
Take a trip through any one of the catagories here in the forums and look for the locked down threads.
Some of them are downright stupid and way beyond ridiculous.
I think reading comprehension is highly overlooked these days in schools.
It clearly states that there are rules and regulations to posting in the forums, unfortunately not many newbies read them.
I find myself shaking my head at some of the things people will post in here. And then they wonder why they got a slap on the wrist or an outright ban over it. The butthurt ones are comical actually.
I took my time wandering around and checking things out before jumping in and posting.
I still veer away from some topics, as I might get overheated on the subject and start foaming at the mouth.
Hopefully, I have contributed to the forums. Sometimes I'll poke fun at the regulars and sometimes I'll answer legitimately. But the odd occasion I've been known to be snarky and hateful and I feel shame and regret after I do it.
Its a decent resolution, and if anything its a reminder to at least show respect for others and their ideas.
Even if it means gently reminding them where the rules of posting are.
We are all entitled to our opinion. We're just not entitled to make someone feel like crap because we don't happen to agree with them.
Now enough rambling from me. I have to go hunt down Dudealicious and make fun of him again. He's funny when he pouts.
Active Ink Slinger
DAMN!
I dunno... but that looks like a "tail" to me
and the last I heard there was nothing wrong with a piece of tail
Either way... if I were you, I'd investigate that thoroughly
I dunno... but that looks like a "tail" to me
and the last I heard there was nothing wrong with a piece of tail
Either way... if I were you, I'd investigate that thoroughly
Active Ink Slinger
Valid points made Shylass... I tried out the chatrooms a couple of times when I first joined (I read the rules and decorum of chat first)
So I said hello and went to lurk quietly in the corner to see how things worked. I found myself booted out... TWICE!
I guess I didn't contribute enough within the first 5mins.
I've stuck with the forums since then to interact with other members in the Lush community.
BTW Thanks Catnip. I didn't realize I could shut off the whispers. They were a little overwhelming and confusing.
So I said hello and went to lurk quietly in the corner to see how things worked. I found myself booted out... TWICE!
I guess I didn't contribute enough within the first 5mins.
I've stuck with the forums since then to interact with other members in the Lush community.
BTW Thanks Catnip. I didn't realize I could shut off the whispers. They were a little overwhelming and confusing.
Active Ink Slinger
No. If you're an adult and you're out somewhere, you can take care of yourself. I don't need you to check in. You're a big boy now, I'm not your mother.
If its 4am and your going to sleep it off at a buddies house... do me a favor and DON'T wake me up with a drunk and stupid phone call at 4am to tell me your staying there - call me when you sober up.
4am phone calls scare me shitless. I think someone's been in a car accident and/or died. My adrenaline starts pumping and I will go through the phone and throttle your drunken ass if you tell me, "Not gonna make it home. I'm drunk. I'm gonna crash at Joe's place." If you're not home by 2am, I figure this is the scenario anyways.
I did have an exboyfriend that would call me twenty times a night. It got to the point I stopped going out with friends because I spent the whole time on the phone.
It started again when I went to get groceries or run errands. Everytime I turned around my phone would ring. I finally quit answering because it was annoying as hell.
The last time, I went out to meet friends for drinks after work. I shut off my phone. Its been over 6 months and he still thinks I'm out having drinks.
If its 4am and your going to sleep it off at a buddies house... do me a favor and DON'T wake me up with a drunk and stupid phone call at 4am to tell me your staying there - call me when you sober up.
4am phone calls scare me shitless. I think someone's been in a car accident and/or died. My adrenaline starts pumping and I will go through the phone and throttle your drunken ass if you tell me, "Not gonna make it home. I'm drunk. I'm gonna crash at Joe's place." If you're not home by 2am, I figure this is the scenario anyways.
I did have an exboyfriend that would call me twenty times a night. It got to the point I stopped going out with friends because I spent the whole time on the phone.
It started again when I went to get groceries or run errands. Everytime I turned around my phone would ring. I finally quit answering because it was annoying as hell.
The last time, I went out to meet friends for drinks after work. I shut off my phone. Its been over 6 months and he still thinks I'm out having drinks.
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by Magical_felix
Get a cheap bottle of champagne, pop the cork, lube the neck, put your thumb over the opening and give it a good shake then swiftly stick it in your ass... It will for sure get any of that old resin out..... I can't tell you how it feels but from what I've seen, its quite an unforgettable experience.
I thought I heard someone say you brought in the New Years this way Felix?
I could be wrong tho...
Active Ink Slinger
Ever heard of the saying "There's no such thing as a free lunch"?
I can't speak for all women, but I know I was raised to be completely self-sufficient and independant. This makes it hard for me to accept gifts.
Last year, I dated a guy that was going to buy me a car, take me away on vacation to the south, and pay half my mortgage.
I felt guilty. I didn't want to take advantage of him and I felt like I was. He said this three months into our relationship.
I analyzed him and the relationship so much I ended up walking away, leaving him baffled.
I felt that if I accepted these gifts that I would be indebted/commited to him, and I hadn't known him long enough at this point, to know if I was going invest more of myself in the relationship.
Leave the grand displays til later on in the relationship and stick with small scale things like a movie or concert or an evening out at friends instead of buying my affection.
Win my affection instead.
I, personally, find it a turn off. Or at the very least a warning sign to run.
I can't speak for all women, but I know I was raised to be completely self-sufficient and independant. This makes it hard for me to accept gifts.
Last year, I dated a guy that was going to buy me a car, take me away on vacation to the south, and pay half my mortgage.
I felt guilty. I didn't want to take advantage of him and I felt like I was. He said this three months into our relationship.
I analyzed him and the relationship so much I ended up walking away, leaving him baffled.
I felt that if I accepted these gifts that I would be indebted/commited to him, and I hadn't known him long enough at this point, to know if I was going invest more of myself in the relationship.
Leave the grand displays til later on in the relationship and stick with small scale things like a movie or concert or an evening out at friends instead of buying my affection.
Win my affection instead.
I, personally, find it a turn off. Or at the very least a warning sign to run.
Active Ink Slinger
This is in Ask the Gals... I gave my opinion on the same regurgitated drivel you've been swamping this section of the forums with over and over.
Your fetish is fine, doesn't bother me in any way.
But 15 or so different topics dedicated to it?
Really? REALLY? One or two wasn't enough?
I'm gonna have to try it again to see if I'm doing it right.
Because the last time I did a chest bump was when I played team sports in high school.
I've moved on and left it behind, since it really did nothing for me except make us all look stupid and kind of juvenile. I leave that up to the guys nowadays.
I have not, nor EVER checked your profile - you are not that interesting...
and PLEASE keep your "Babe" to yourself. I have a name, and its NOT Babe.
Everytime I see it I think of some cheesy skeezeball guy trying to remember my name or that your calling me a petname after that pig movie.
Your fetish is fine, doesn't bother me in any way.
But 15 or so different topics dedicated to it?
Really? REALLY? One or two wasn't enough?
I'm gonna have to try it again to see if I'm doing it right.
Because the last time I did a chest bump was when I played team sports in high school.
I've moved on and left it behind, since it really did nothing for me except make us all look stupid and kind of juvenile. I leave that up to the guys nowadays.
I have not, nor EVER checked your profile - you are not that interesting...
and PLEASE keep your "Babe" to yourself. I have a name, and its NOT Babe.
Everytime I see it I think of some cheesy skeezeball guy trying to remember my name or that your calling me a petname after that pig movie.
Active Ink Slinger
PLEASE! PLEASE! PLEASE!
Can you PLEASE find a new topic that doesn't relate to breasts.
Yes, we know you have large breasts.
Yes, we know you enjoy rubbing them against other girls.
And now I've heard enough of the topic to essentially scar me for life.
I keep seeing you post new topics Zoey and I, unfortunately, check them out with the hope that you've found something new to talk about.
Again, I've been disappointed.
Can you PLEASE find a new topic that doesn't relate to breasts.
Yes, we know you have large breasts.
Yes, we know you enjoy rubbing them against other girls.
And now I've heard enough of the topic to essentially scar me for life.
I keep seeing you post new topics Zoey and I, unfortunately, check them out with the hope that you've found something new to talk about.
Again, I've been disappointed.
Active Ink Slinger
Fire. My worst nightmare is burning to death.
Or my kids. (They can be a nightmare, too) But if anything happened to them, I don't think I would handle it well.
The rest I can deal with... I can survive being rejected, ignored, hated on, or judged.
But if I something ever happened to my kids I don't think I could live without heavy sedation.
OH and earwigs creep me out!
Or my kids. (They can be a nightmare, too) But if anything happened to them, I don't think I would handle it well.
The rest I can deal with... I can survive being rejected, ignored, hated on, or judged.
But if I something ever happened to my kids I don't think I could live without heavy sedation.
OH and earwigs creep me out!
Active Ink Slinger
Well said LM! Thats the New Year's Spirit!
I waited and watched the forums for a couple of months before jumping in with the sharks.
Generally, common sense and respect prevails before I post something, but I have been known to be snarky in the past.
Sometimes I just can't help myself! But I'll try to behave since it is a great idea for a resolution.
Now a quick idea...
For offending members maybe a Dunk Tank thread?
I have $5 on Dude... and $10 on CG
I waited and watched the forums for a couple of months before jumping in with the sharks.
Generally, common sense and respect prevails before I post something, but I have been known to be snarky in the past.
Sometimes I just can't help myself! But I'll try to behave since it is a great idea for a resolution.
Now a quick idea...
For offending members maybe a Dunk Tank thread?
I have $5 on Dude... and $10 on CG
Active Ink Slinger
Bacon flavored anything belongs in the pet stores. For example: Beggin' Strips - bacon-flavored dog treats
Hmmm... now that I think about it though, do you think I could get my boyfriend to "sit up and beg" with this stuff?
There might be more to this than originally thought...
Hmmm... now that I think about it though, do you think I could get my boyfriend to "sit up and beg" with this stuff?
There might be more to this than originally thought...
Active Ink Slinger
There's been a few occasions where I thought to myself What the hell am I doing?
Thankfully, they showed me...
Thankfully, they showed me...
Active Ink Slinger
I end up with alot of hobbies, sadly. I now know how to paint with watercolors and acrylics, make sculptures and write stories for Lush.
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by InSearchofAlice
Hello all, nice to finally exist properly here! I realize my username is a bit unwieldy, but there's a bit of a story behind that. Suffice to say you can call me just about anything you like, though; I answer pretty quickly to Sparky or Mike.
As for who I am- I'm a twentysomething male who's not ashamed to admit that I see the purpose of life as having the best possible time with it while you can. I try to apply that outlook to everything I do, from work (I'm a freelance stagehand with a standing position as a sales representative for a small company) to relationships (I'm polyamorous and have been dabbling with my sexuality lately) to religion (a Universalist with little further desire to talk about it!)... and hopefully it will translate relatively well in my writing. That said, I haven't actually ventured into writing erotica yet- hyper-gritty sci-fi is more my bag- but I'm eager to try my hand at it. Any pointers anyone's got would be more than welcomeI'm thoroughly a product of the nineties, so my music tastes have a pretty heavy focus in industrial and grunge, but I'm willing to give anything a shot and have a lot of respect for other musicians. On that note- that's my bad pun for the week- I've played guitar for about a year and bass for two, but haven't really gotten a whole lot of anywhere with either yet. I tend to wear my emotions on my sleeve, but I'm good at being polite and settling issues on the sidelines as well.
Now THAT'S an introduction.
Welcome to Lush
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by MissyLuvsYa
PLEASE NO MEN!
So is this the new 'code' word for someone who is really a man pretending to be a lesbian or bisexual female?
That is the first thing I suspect when I see it in a profile.
Its like a few things in my life... I invest about thirty seconds of thought into it and then move on.
IF they want to make an ass of themselves with me... then I'll invest another minute or so to tell them off - IF I believe they are worth even that much time.
But that applies to anyone, not just horny, creepy bastids pretending to be lesbians or bisexual females.
Active Ink Slinger
Only one favorite?!?! I have it narrowed down to 3...
1. Standing doggy style - great for the shower, kitchen or anyplace a quickie strikes our fancy (leave your boots on for traction
)
2. On top while he's sitting in a chair - awesome position to tease your partner and have alot of control (sitting or straddling is great)
3. Spooning sex - a fantastic way to wake up in the morning (better than coffee)
All the rest are pretty great too, now that I think about it. But thats my top 3
1. Standing doggy style - great for the shower, kitchen or anyplace a quickie strikes our fancy (leave your boots on for traction
)2. On top while he's sitting in a chair - awesome position to tease your partner and have alot of control (sitting or straddling is great)
3. Spooning sex - a fantastic way to wake up in the morning (better than coffee)
All the rest are pretty great too, now that I think about it. But thats my top 3
Active Ink Slinger
Got a craving for some comfort food... Shepherds Pie and possibly a Smithwicks to go with it
Active Ink Slinger
A guy who purchased his lovely wife a pocket Taser for their anniversary submitted this:
Last weekend I saw something at Larry's Pistol & Pawn Shop that sparked my interest. The occasion was our 15th anniversary and I was looking for a little something extra for my wife Julie.
What I came across was a 100,000-volt, pocket/purse-sized taser. The effects of the taser were supposed to be short lived, with no long-term adverse affect on your assailant, allowing her adequate time to retreat to safety.
WAY TOO COOL!
Long story short, I bought the device and brought it home.
I loaded two AAA batteries in the darn thing and pushed the button.
Nothing! I was disappointed. I learned, however, that if I pushed the button AND pressed it against a metal surface at the same time; I'd get the blue arc of electricity darting back and forth between the prongs.
AWESOME!!!
Unfortunately, I have yet to explain to Julie what that burn spot is on the face of her microwave.
Okay, so I was home alone with this new toy, thinking to myself that it couldn't be all that bad with only two AAA batteries, right?
There I sat in my recliner, my cat Gracie looking on intently (trusting little soul) while I was reading the directions and thinking that I really needed to try this thing out on a flesh & blood moving target.
I must admit I thought about zapping Gracie (for a fraction of a second) and thought better of it. She is such a sweet cat.
But, if I was going to give this thing to my wife to protect herself against a mugger, I did want some assurance that it would work as advertised. Am I wrong?
So, there I sat in a pair of shorts and a tank top with my reading glasses perched delicately on the bridge of my nose, directions in one hand, and taser in another.
The directions said that a one-second burst would shock and disorient your assailant;
a two-second burst was supposed to cause muscle spasms and a major loss of bodily control;
a three-second burst would purportedly make your assailant flop on the ground like a fish out of water.
Any burst longer than three seconds would be wasting the batteries.
All the while I'm looking at this little device measuring about 5' long, less than 3/4 inch in circumference; pretty cute really and (loaded with two itsy, bitsy AAA batteries) thinking to myself, 'no possible way!'
What happened next is almost beyond description, but I'll do my best...
I'm sitting there alone, Gracie looking on with her head cocked to one side as if to say, 'don't do it,' reasoning that a one second burst from such a tiny little ole thing couldn't hurt all that bad.
I decided to give myself a one second burst just for the heck of it.
I touched the prongs to my naked thigh, pushed the button, and . . .
HOLY MOTHER OF GOD . . .
WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION . . .
WHAT THE HELL!!!
I'm pretty sure Jessie Ventura ran in through the side door, picked me up in the recliner, then body slammed us both on the carpet, over and over and over again. I vaguely recall waking up on my side in the fetal position, with tears in my eyes, body soaking wet, both nipples on fire, testicles nowhere to be found, with my left arm tucked under my body in the oddest position, and tingling in my legs.
The cat was making meowing sounds I had never heard before, clinging to a picture frame hanging above the fireplace, obviously in an attempt to avoid getting slammed by my body flopping all over the living room.
Note: If you ever feel compelled to 'mug' yourself with a taser, one note of caution: there is no such thing as a one second burst when you zap yourself! You will not let go of that thing until it is dislodged from your hand by a violent thrashing about on the floor. A three second burst would be considered conservative.
THAT HURT LIKE HELL!!!
A minute or so later (I can't be sure, as time was a relative thing at that point), I collected my wits (what little I had left), sat up and surveyed the landscape.
My bent reading glasses were on the mantel of the fireplace.
The recliner was upside down and about 8 feet or so from where it originally was.
My triceps, right thigh and both nipples were still twitching.
My face felt like it had been shot up with Novocain, and my bottom lip weighed 88 lbs.
I had no control over the drooling.
Apparently I shit myself, but was too numb to know for sure and my sense of smell was gone.
I saw a faint smoke cloud above my head which I believe came from my hair.
I'm still looking for my nuts and I'm offering a significant reward for their safe return!!
P. S. My wife loved the gift, and now regularly threatens me with it!
Last weekend I saw something at Larry's Pistol & Pawn Shop that sparked my interest. The occasion was our 15th anniversary and I was looking for a little something extra for my wife Julie.
What I came across was a 100,000-volt, pocket/purse-sized taser. The effects of the taser were supposed to be short lived, with no long-term adverse affect on your assailant, allowing her adequate time to retreat to safety.
WAY TOO COOL!
Long story short, I bought the device and brought it home.
I loaded two AAA batteries in the darn thing and pushed the button.
Nothing! I was disappointed. I learned, however, that if I pushed the button AND pressed it against a metal surface at the same time; I'd get the blue arc of electricity darting back and forth between the prongs.
AWESOME!!!
Unfortunately, I have yet to explain to Julie what that burn spot is on the face of her microwave.
Okay, so I was home alone with this new toy, thinking to myself that it couldn't be all that bad with only two AAA batteries, right?
There I sat in my recliner, my cat Gracie looking on intently (trusting little soul) while I was reading the directions and thinking that I really needed to try this thing out on a flesh & blood moving target.
I must admit I thought about zapping Gracie (for a fraction of a second) and thought better of it. She is such a sweet cat.
But, if I was going to give this thing to my wife to protect herself against a mugger, I did want some assurance that it would work as advertised. Am I wrong?
So, there I sat in a pair of shorts and a tank top with my reading glasses perched delicately on the bridge of my nose, directions in one hand, and taser in another.
The directions said that a one-second burst would shock and disorient your assailant;
a two-second burst was supposed to cause muscle spasms and a major loss of bodily control;
a three-second burst would purportedly make your assailant flop on the ground like a fish out of water.
Any burst longer than three seconds would be wasting the batteries.
All the while I'm looking at this little device measuring about 5' long, less than 3/4 inch in circumference; pretty cute really and (loaded with two itsy, bitsy AAA batteries) thinking to myself, 'no possible way!'
What happened next is almost beyond description, but I'll do my best...
I'm sitting there alone, Gracie looking on with her head cocked to one side as if to say, 'don't do it,' reasoning that a one second burst from such a tiny little ole thing couldn't hurt all that bad.
I decided to give myself a one second burst just for the heck of it.
I touched the prongs to my naked thigh, pushed the button, and . . .
HOLY MOTHER OF GOD . . .
WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION . . .
WHAT THE HELL!!!
I'm pretty sure Jessie Ventura ran in through the side door, picked me up in the recliner, then body slammed us both on the carpet, over and over and over again. I vaguely recall waking up on my side in the fetal position, with tears in my eyes, body soaking wet, both nipples on fire, testicles nowhere to be found, with my left arm tucked under my body in the oddest position, and tingling in my legs.
The cat was making meowing sounds I had never heard before, clinging to a picture frame hanging above the fireplace, obviously in an attempt to avoid getting slammed by my body flopping all over the living room.
Note: If you ever feel compelled to 'mug' yourself with a taser, one note of caution: there is no such thing as a one second burst when you zap yourself! You will not let go of that thing until it is dislodged from your hand by a violent thrashing about on the floor. A three second burst would be considered conservative.
THAT HURT LIKE HELL!!!
A minute or so later (I can't be sure, as time was a relative thing at that point), I collected my wits (what little I had left), sat up and surveyed the landscape.
My bent reading glasses were on the mantel of the fireplace.
The recliner was upside down and about 8 feet or so from where it originally was.
My triceps, right thigh and both nipples were still twitching.
My face felt like it had been shot up with Novocain, and my bottom lip weighed 88 lbs.
I had no control over the drooling.
Apparently I shit myself, but was too numb to know for sure and my sense of smell was gone.
I saw a faint smoke cloud above my head which I believe came from my hair.
I'm still looking for my nuts and I'm offering a significant reward for their safe return!!
P. S. My wife loved the gift, and now regularly threatens me with it!
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by Dudealicious
I'm crushed!! I was planning a road trip out to see you as well...
Sorry Pumpkin... I know how you guys are
Active Ink Slinger
After a bad experience once, I have no desire to meet anyone from online... ever.
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by nicola
Thx!
Nope... thank you nicola for such a great site
Thats not ass kissing too much? Is it?
Active Ink Slinger
My ex-boyfriend got me onto this site.
Use it for what it is. As a tool, not a replacement.
We had an awful lot of fun "reenacting" stories or just using ideas from them to spice things up.
Read stories together. Print off copies of both your favorites.
You could always slip a copy of her favorite story into her purse or under her pillow as a surprise.
Sometimes, women need a boost to get in the mood. I found my ex got very lazy when it came to sex after we'd been together awhile. For women, the details matter.
If you won't talk to her about it, at least take the time to get back to the details. Find out what she's looking into on here. It could be very eye opening for you.
I couldn't talk about what I desired. Ever. Its why Lush was great for me.
I could just print off a copy of a story that turned me on and leave it for him.
It could be the same for her.
Use it for what it is. As a tool, not a replacement.
We had an awful lot of fun "reenacting" stories or just using ideas from them to spice things up.
Read stories together. Print off copies of both your favorites.
You could always slip a copy of her favorite story into her purse or under her pillow as a surprise.
Sometimes, women need a boost to get in the mood. I found my ex got very lazy when it came to sex after we'd been together awhile. For women, the details matter.
If you won't talk to her about it, at least take the time to get back to the details. Find out what she's looking into on here. It could be very eye opening for you.
I couldn't talk about what I desired. Ever. Its why Lush was great for me.
I could just print off a copy of a story that turned me on and leave it for him.
It could be the same for her.