Join the best erotica focused adult social network now
Login
TheDevilsWeakness
Over 90 days ago
Straight Female
Canada
Forum
Active Ink Slinger
Why is CG so awesome?
If she was my neighbour, she would be the one I'd call if I needed: a cup of sugar, a bottle of wine, an ear to vent to, someone to help hide bodies, listen to music with, and hide from our children when they get on our last nerves.
She would make an awesome superhero solely because of her hair.
I'd be proud to be in the same holding cell as her after an evening of mayhem and mischievousness.
And she totally gets my warped sense of humour and can match it with her own.
If she was my neighbour, she would be the one I'd call if I needed: a cup of sugar, a bottle of wine, an ear to vent to, someone to help hide bodies, listen to music with, and hide from our children when they get on our last nerves.
She would make an awesome superhero solely because of her hair.
I'd be proud to be in the same holding cell as her after an evening of mayhem and mischievousness.
And she totally gets my warped sense of humour and can match it with her own.
Active Ink Slinger
Wait a sec. The AV of Dudealicious really is Dudealicious. I've seen that sweep across hairdo in his other pics. I mistakenly thought it was a seagull flying at his head but he kindly informed me it was a windy day.
If my AV was really me, I'd be sitting on a huge snowbank with blue lips and the perkiest nipples imaginable, cause it's fucking frigid here. But I never use my real pics as my AV. I just don't want or need that kind of attention from anyone that might actually know who I am. You have to be my friend (or those creepy stalking mods) to see my personal gallery of what I really look like.
I usually resort back to the infamous words of the imaginary Dr House when dealing with anyone or anything on the internet. Everybody lies. Intentionally or unintentionally, it happens.
If my AV was really me, I'd be sitting on a huge snowbank with blue lips and the perkiest nipples imaginable, cause it's fucking frigid here. But I never use my real pics as my AV. I just don't want or need that kind of attention from anyone that might actually know who I am. You have to be my friend (or those creepy stalking mods) to see my personal gallery of what I really look like.
I usually resort back to the infamous words of the imaginary Dr House when dealing with anyone or anything on the internet. Everybody lies. Intentionally or unintentionally, it happens.
Active Ink Slinger
I'm on the exercise bandwagon but I seem to get a lot of stares when I stretch...
Am I doing it wrong?
Am I doing it wrong?
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by CurlyGirly
You better believe we are!! Get your nose right in there, Baby!!
Pfffft... Amateur. I thought you said you were going to try it this way!
Active Ink Slinger
Egg Salad Sandwiches are my favourite.
Nothing fancy, just some hard boiled eggs shredded, diced scallions (green onions), salt and pepper, and enough mayo so it's not too dry or sloppy.
Serve it up on some nice soft buns or bread with a slice of lettuce and I'm a happy camper.
My next favourite is also simple. Thinly sliced cucumber, tomato, lettuce and cheddar cheese on toasted bread with mayo.
Nothing fancy, just some hard boiled eggs shredded, diced scallions (green onions), salt and pepper, and enough mayo so it's not too dry or sloppy.
Serve it up on some nice soft buns or bread with a slice of lettuce and I'm a happy camper.
My next favourite is also simple. Thinly sliced cucumber, tomato, lettuce and cheddar cheese on toasted bread with mayo.
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by dpw
What, and risk the hollandaise splitting or the bernaise catching! I've got a soufflee that needs watching and the creme anglaise still to make! We can play later.
Swoon Talk foodie to me!!
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by naughtynurse
Ms. Devil, per our agreement you were not to reveal the conditions of said contract.
Dear Miss Naughty,
I wrote the rules.
Devilushly yours,
The Devils Weakness
Active Ink Slinger
Abso-friggin-lutely!!
I enjoy cooking and have been doing the major share of it since I was able to turn the stove on by myself.
To have someone cook me a meal, from scratch, without opening a prepackaged box or takeout bag would mean the world to me.
It would be even more spectacular if they cleaned up after themselves.
If you're not a cook, learning to make one really great meal is worth it's weight in gold.
Besides, there's nothing sexier than a man that knows his way around a kitchen.
I enjoy cooking and have been doing the major share of it since I was able to turn the stove on by myself.
To have someone cook me a meal, from scratch, without opening a prepackaged box or takeout bag would mean the world to me.
It would be even more spectacular if they cleaned up after themselves.
If you're not a cook, learning to make one really great meal is worth it's weight in gold.
Besides, there's nothing sexier than a man that knows his way around a kitchen.
Active Ink Slinger
I like Nutella. Just not on bread. I prefer to add it when I make ice cream. It never quite freezes and it adds a nice texture. It's much nicer to swirl into it than chocolate chips which freeze into little rocks of chocolate that I can break a tooth on.
Active Ink Slinger
Just call me the cookie monster. 
If there's a plate of 8 different kinds of cookies, I will have 8 cookies (I like to call it quality control). Unless there's raisins. BLECH.
I make these for special occasions, but I have no idea what they're called. All I know is they're soooo damn good.
If there's a plate of 8 different kinds of cookies, I will have 8 cookies (I like to call it quality control). Unless there's raisins. BLECH.
I make these for special occasions, but I have no idea what they're called. All I know is they're soooo damn good.
Active Ink Slinger
I'm pretty easy. I like to be bribed.
Bribed with cookies = 3 (NOTE: I deduct points for raisins)
Bribed with wine = 4
Bribed with chocolate = 5
Bribed with all of the above = 5 + gushing and glowing comment about your literary work/style
Now that I'm done joking around. (I'm not. Send cookies/chocolate/wine!) I asked for feedback on my first story.
I was told it was average.
I'm not saying average is a bad thing. Average is good, but I wanted to be better than average.
So I always kept that one comment in mind every time I wrote another story.
Hopefully it made me a better writer. And it made me think about how I scored stories.
Everyone starts with a 3. From there it goes up or I quit reading and don't bother scoring. Life is too short to waste time reading something I don't enjoy in some aspect.
Bribed with cookies = 3 (NOTE: I deduct points for raisins)
Bribed with wine = 4
Bribed with chocolate = 5
Bribed with all of the above = 5 + gushing and glowing comment about your literary work/style
Now that I'm done joking around. (I'm not. Send cookies/chocolate/wine!) I asked for feedback on my first story.
I was told it was average.
I'm not saying average is a bad thing. Average is good, but I wanted to be better than average.
So I always kept that one comment in mind every time I wrote another story.
Hopefully it made me a better writer. And it made me think about how I scored stories.
Everyone starts with a 3. From there it goes up or I quit reading and don't bother scoring. Life is too short to waste time reading something I don't enjoy in some aspect.
Active Ink Slinger
I'm pretty fearless when it comes to making anything in the kitchen. But I think my holy grail would be Bisteeya.
I haven't had it in years, but I still remember the taste. *Drool*
It's a sweet and savory chicken pie made with almonds, cinnamon and phyllo pastry.
It's nummy and delicious and a painstakingly long process to make it.
But I've finally managed to make spanakopitas without making a total mess, so it might be next on my list of things to conquer.
I haven't had it in years, but I still remember the taste. *Drool*
It's a sweet and savory chicken pie made with almonds, cinnamon and phyllo pastry.
It's nummy and delicious and a painstakingly long process to make it.
But I've finally managed to make spanakopitas without making a total mess, so it might be next on my list of things to conquer.
Active Ink Slinger
It took me a few days, but I finally figured it out. 
I'm all set for next Sunday.
Cause this wasn't working.
I'm all set for next Sunday.
Cause this wasn't working.
Active Ink Slinger
Dear Insecure Cunt,
I don't want your "man". Ever. And I'm not looking for one. Although you might want to tell him you're in a relationship, cause I don't think he knows.
Or maybe he's hoping if he ignores you long enough, you'll go the fuck away.
I am not in fucking high school anymore and I never played that fucking game anyways when I WAS in high school.
Give your head a shake and come back to reality cause you're living in a fucking dreamworld. He is not a fucking prize by any means.
Keep your passive-aggressive heavily veiled threats to yourself. I don't want or need your drama.
If I wanted to be a raging twat like you, I could point out the guy I'm seeing is 110% better. In every way.
Ya know? Like my boyfriend is better than your boyfriend? But I'm not that fucking childish. I hope when I get to your age, I'm not that insecure.
You hover around him like flies do to a pile of shit. Hmmm... I guess that makes you a pest and him a big, stinking pile of feces.
You might want to think about that the next time you scowl and flip me the finger from across a crowded room cause your imaginary boyfriend came over to talk to everyone at our table.
You're a pest. And I have no problem slapping a bitch down.
I don't want your "man". Ever. And I'm not looking for one. Although you might want to tell him you're in a relationship, cause I don't think he knows.
Or maybe he's hoping if he ignores you long enough, you'll go the fuck away.
I am not in fucking high school anymore and I never played that fucking game anyways when I WAS in high school.
Give your head a shake and come back to reality cause you're living in a fucking dreamworld. He is not a fucking prize by any means.
Keep your passive-aggressive heavily veiled threats to yourself. I don't want or need your drama.
If I wanted to be a raging twat like you, I could point out the guy I'm seeing is 110% better. In every way.
Ya know? Like my boyfriend is better than your boyfriend? But I'm not that fucking childish. I hope when I get to your age, I'm not that insecure.
You hover around him like flies do to a pile of shit. Hmmm... I guess that makes you a pest and him a big, stinking pile of feces.
You might want to think about that the next time you scowl and flip me the finger from across a crowded room cause your imaginary boyfriend came over to talk to everyone at our table.
You're a pest. And I have no problem slapping a bitch down.
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by wolverine15
This has to be the official sign of the Sandwich
Active Ink Slinger
You have to be a part of a secret society.
The rules in the handbook specifically state that we're not allowed to talk about what goes on at functions with non-members.
The people that discuss it in public have either; (a) been booted from the club, or (b) have not read the whole handbook.
Failure to comply with the rules stipulated in the contract you sign when inducted into the club will involve the immediate removal of your statue and your name from the stone tablets in the inner sanctum.
The rules in the handbook specifically state that we're not allowed to talk about what goes on at functions with non-members.
The people that discuss it in public have either; (a) been booted from the club, or (b) have not read the whole handbook.
Failure to comply with the rules stipulated in the contract you sign when inducted into the club will involve the immediate removal of your statue and your name from the stone tablets in the inner sanctum.
Active Ink Slinger
*GASP* Hide the panties and bras! Someone might think I wear them!
Really? I have better things to worry about than what someone might possibly think about what brand of underwear I buy. Or that I might use tampons or pads or anything else necessary in my daily life. Welcome to 2014. This is not 1914. When women had to pretend the unmentionables were "dirty" (even after a fresh laundering) and men couldn't handle the idea we might actually need these things.
The next time I buy underwear I will put it on my head and walk out of the store and think of you hasabrain2.
Really? I have better things to worry about than what someone might possibly think about what brand of underwear I buy. Or that I might use tampons or pads or anything else necessary in my daily life. Welcome to 2014. This is not 1914. When women had to pretend the unmentionables were "dirty" (even after a fresh laundering) and men couldn't handle the idea we might actually need these things.
The next time I buy underwear I will put it on my head and walk out of the store and think of you hasabrain2.
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by cooldaddy
I hereby offer my sincere apologies to all, and hope you will forgive my presumption in thinking it was all about me.
On your birthday it IS all about you. I'm fairly certain that LafayetteMister will forgive you as long as you leave him some boobies to grope and ogle.
Happy Belated Birthday!
Active Ink Slinger
What part of "Go the fuck away" don't you understand?
I wish I was a violent person so I could rearrange your face with my boot. Or a buick.
I wish I was a violent person so I could rearrange your face with my boot. Or a buick.
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by CurlyGirly
Sorry, my laptop got killed dead! Waiting on a replacement battery to be delivered. Hopefully, that does the trick. I'm a slacker, but I hate Lushing on my phone. Hope to be back soon!!
Happy 2014 you drunken pervs!! Miss you!
I'll "cover" for you this time CG...
Now let me know if you mean this?
Or this?
I'm new here so I might need guidance on the rules or lack of... in the Big Sandwich.
Active Ink Slinger
Sure. Hang on a sec while I get all my credit card information and social insurance number and address and anything else you could possibly need.
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by Shylass
Is that like a tit-wank, but with the golf club between them instead of a willy? A lot of people would pay good money to see that, you know.
Hmmm... What do you think I should charge?
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by sirrobertstories
Would a man really grab the boob of a stranger? On real life? That must be an uncommon incident, isn't it? I mean, I suppose not all women have been attacked in such a way once in their lives.
Yes, they do. This would be one of those "problems" (note my quotations) that happens to almost every girl at least once in their lives.
Another issue I've ran into on almost a daily basis because I have boobs, I must not have a brain.
I've had drag 'em out fights with mechanics when they think they can snow the dumb broad and charge me extra for replacing my headlights or windshield wipers.
When I'm 80yrs old, then they can do it. Until then, I'm quite capable of avoiding the extra $100 by doing it myself.
I'm one of those girls that can gauge my weight gain and loss through my boobs. So that lovely bra I got back in the summer, that fit perfectly and was totally comfortable and cost only $85 isn't any good to me anymore since I've lost 10lbs.
And since I'm quite tall, I get a lot of short guys trying to hug me.
But what really irritates me the most? My boobs fuck with my golf swing.
Active Ink Slinger
Merry Christmas & Happy Holidays!!
I didn't make cookies like CG did, but I did make everyone an ornament... Enjoy!
I didn't make cookies like CG did, but I did make everyone an ornament... Enjoy!
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by wolverine15
Did he look a little like this?
Nah. He wasn't that sketchy looking. He looked more like this...
Perfectly normal in comparison.