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TheScheherezadeFeint
Over 90 days ago
Bisexual Female
United States
Forum
Story Verifier
Well, in terms of the first time, that could just mean you did well. I'm sorry to hear about him ditching you after you made him cum when you fucked. The early ejaculation could still mean he's just really into you, but you should stand up for what you want afterward. He may be nervous or worried that he can't perform. I was once with a guy who didn't want to try because he had been in a long relationship where he and his girlfriend simply weren't compatible, and more than that, she never gave him any guidance and told him that he was lousy in bed. I think you should talk it out with him.
Story Verifier
Eh. I wear them sometimes. If I'm out in a skirt and I don't want to slut it up, then sure. Or if I want to, and need something to hold a vibrator in place.
Story Verifier
Well, patience is important. I've had a similar problem with my girlfriend from time to time. I don't think you should just wait it out, but exercising a degree of tact and patience is important. It's also important to know the following thins: women often enjoy sex if they don't have an orgasm, and the pressure to have one can be a turn off (not saying you're necessarily doing that, but it's the way it is for many relationships). Also, sometimes my partner (or I) will take part in sex even if we're not in the mood because we want to please the other. For us, and for many women that's not a big deal, and the pressure to want sex can when we're willing to please our partners or even want to, that can also be a pretty significant libido crusher.
The anti-depressants and birth control can absolutely affect a woman's sex drive negatively. It's good to keep in mind that for every common side effect most medications have, there's an equal and opposite side effect that affects a much smaller, but not necessarily insignificant percentage. I suspect that if you're in love as you seem to be, then it's something that can be worked out. Perhaps not easily, but I'm sure it would be worthwhile and I bet your wife thinks the same thing.
One more thing. Typical (or traditional, if you prefer) intercourse puts MUCH more stress on the female body than a man's. If you got fucked in the ass every time you had sex you'd be less likely to want to do it routinely also, even if you absolutely love getting pounded anally. I realize that it's a flawed metaphor since the vagina is far more resilient than the anus, but it's still a degree of wear and tear that can build up to soreness or outright pain. I suggest that you think about other types of sex if you haven't already. A blowjob is much easier for most women, and many of us really enjoy giving them. It's still a penetrative form of sex, but the potential for physical damage is dramatically lowered unless you grab her head and fuck her face, though the psychological stress of penetration remains. If that doesn't work, handjobs and other manual stimulation can work. Toys can work for men and women, and rather than tell you all about that I'll just refer you to about 40% of the internet. Failing those ideas, masturbating together, or having her touch you and/or just cuddle a bit while you work on yourself, having her jump in occasionally can be very satisfying for couples. Chances are she wants you to feel satisfied and would be willing to try a number of these things. Hope that's helpful.
Other options include a fully or partially open relationship - although I realize the scheduling of having young children creates many difficulties with that lifestyle, even if your wife is so inclined. Also, novelty in the bedroom (or other rooms) can be arousing to many of us. Changes in location, equipment, number of partners can be great if both (or all) parties are into it.
Finally, it's also possible that she has a deeply engrained fetish that is either more recently acquired than your marriage, or is just now surfacing/she's becoming more and more aware of it, but doesn't want to tell you because she's embarrassed or worried about being judged. Even in a safe, trusting relationship, that's entirely possible. Sometimes that fear is based on something minor (or major) that happened and a mind latches onto, a childhood trauma or shame, and it could be totally baseless and irrational, but that doesn't render it meaningless.
In conclusion, it's a complicated matter, and I've covered only some of the more common solutions and potential causes. I hope this helps.
The anti-depressants and birth control can absolutely affect a woman's sex drive negatively. It's good to keep in mind that for every common side effect most medications have, there's an equal and opposite side effect that affects a much smaller, but not necessarily insignificant percentage. I suspect that if you're in love as you seem to be, then it's something that can be worked out. Perhaps not easily, but I'm sure it would be worthwhile and I bet your wife thinks the same thing.
One more thing. Typical (or traditional, if you prefer) intercourse puts MUCH more stress on the female body than a man's. If you got fucked in the ass every time you had sex you'd be less likely to want to do it routinely also, even if you absolutely love getting pounded anally. I realize that it's a flawed metaphor since the vagina is far more resilient than the anus, but it's still a degree of wear and tear that can build up to soreness or outright pain. I suggest that you think about other types of sex if you haven't already. A blowjob is much easier for most women, and many of us really enjoy giving them. It's still a penetrative form of sex, but the potential for physical damage is dramatically lowered unless you grab her head and fuck her face, though the psychological stress of penetration remains. If that doesn't work, handjobs and other manual stimulation can work. Toys can work for men and women, and rather than tell you all about that I'll just refer you to about 40% of the internet. Failing those ideas, masturbating together, or having her touch you and/or just cuddle a bit while you work on yourself, having her jump in occasionally can be very satisfying for couples. Chances are she wants you to feel satisfied and would be willing to try a number of these things. Hope that's helpful.
Other options include a fully or partially open relationship - although I realize the scheduling of having young children creates many difficulties with that lifestyle, even if your wife is so inclined. Also, novelty in the bedroom (or other rooms) can be arousing to many of us. Changes in location, equipment, number of partners can be great if both (or all) parties are into it.
Finally, it's also possible that she has a deeply engrained fetish that is either more recently acquired than your marriage, or is just now surfacing/she's becoming more and more aware of it, but doesn't want to tell you because she's embarrassed or worried about being judged. Even in a safe, trusting relationship, that's entirely possible. Sometimes that fear is based on something minor (or major) that happened and a mind latches onto, a childhood trauma or shame, and it could be totally baseless and irrational, but that doesn't render it meaningless.
In conclusion, it's a complicated matter, and I've covered only some of the more common solutions and potential causes. I hope this helps.
Story Verifier
Of course. I like knowing that I'm appealing and sexy. It makes me feel good as a woman and as a sex partner. If I can get a guy hard before I even touch him, all the better, but I really like to see it happen.
Story Verifier
My official stance is:
...Ick.
That's right on the edge of what I might consider fun under the absolutely right circumstances.
...Ick.
That's right on the edge of what I might consider fun under the absolutely right circumstances.
Story Verifier
Umm... I want to be treated as an equal, as I imagine most women do. I'm sure there's another side to the argument than can be articulated well, but it mystifies me.
Story Verifier
Met through a friend. We hung out a couple of times, had a good time, then didn't see each other for a few weeks. I got her number from our friend and invited her to a party I was having. Embarrassingly, she was the only one who showed up. After the initial awkwardness wore off it was kind of hilarious, and we had an awesome night. Been together since.
Story Verifier
It's absolutely a personal preference thing. And JohnC makes an excellent point about the point of focus. I can tell you that I love it. I really like cum, though. Seeing a guy shoot, feeling it land on me, keeping it there for him to look at afterward. I usually like to get rid of it once it gets cold, because much after that it gets sticky and hard to clean.
Story Verifier
Good point, Kimasa. I love it, but then, I love cum pretty much everywhere. Especially on my chest or in my mouth though. I just feel like I've done a good job. I'll let him cum on my face if I really fancy him, but otherwise it's my chest for most guys.
Story Verifier
I might challenge that assertion, but at the same time, I've never defined "the friend zone" to myself or others. I usually think of being friends when we could have dated as the zone, but I guess I don't usually maintain a relationship where one party is interested but not the other. I guess I would be offended if it happened for any of the reasons you said though. My suggestion for those who get "friend zoned" or have to do the zoning, is that it's best to give both people some time to cool off.
Story Verifier
No. I don't even send them on here. Sorry boys and girls. I try to describe myself pretty well, but that's all. Hearts!
Story Verifier
My best suggestion is to go with what you like to write. If you're really interested in high scores and votes then you need to play to your audience a little, but barring that, write a story that you enjoy. It's pretty much guaranteed that some of the 204,000 member of lush will also enjoy it.
Story Verifier
As a girl who is just a bit transgendered, I run into the problem occasionally out in the world, but I don't think I've been here long enough to have the trouble. I'm also far less identified or identifiable as trans than you seem to be. Wish you the best.
Story Verifier
Maybe it's because I like to give shower blowjobs, and it's usually at my place. I like my guys clean, so they clean up (or I do it) with my shampoo and body-wash. When I smell a guy who uses that stuff, there's an even money chance I'll start to feel a little tingle, even if I'm not all that into him. At this point it's just a knee-jerk response.
Story Verifier
I took it a long time ago, but I scored a 91%. Makes me feel good about me.
Story Verifier
I don't always, but sometimes I just can't help myself...
Story Verifier
Anytime with my girlfriend. When we bring home a guy though, I let Raquel go to town on him at first and then I wake him up later for a fuck in the middle of the night. If she's asleep I love making him cum on her or in her mouth (and so does she). He also usually wakes up to a blowjob from both of us.