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WellMadeMale
7 hours ago
Straight Male
0 miles · Kansas City
Forum
Constant Gardener
After reading some of these, I am a damned convert.
A four inch tongue can bring a six foot man to his knees.
Where does the line form up, for some of that?
A four inch tongue can bring a six foot man to his knees.
Where does the line form up, for some of that?
Constant Gardener
She appears to be on the pretty side of cute. Looks like she would feed her guests tasty (though skimpy) portions - which might actually be better for our health. Aside from proudly being a BabeInTotalControlofHerself...she sometimes says little and yet makes great sense.
Sometimes.
Sometimes.
Constant Gardener
Peach flavored, about 63 inches tall, and lasted 16.25 minutes. Slow ride
Constant Gardener
Remember to remove the dog collar before passing out, in the hot tub, after snorting your party favors.
Could be a career derailer, if you forget.
Could be a career derailer, if you forget.
Constant Gardener
Quote by catchy
Hey lushies! Need some advice from Someone who lives or has been to las vegas. I wanna purpose to my gf in a couple of years and i love to be able to take her to las vegas and purpose to her infront of the big water display thing (dont actually no what its called). Whats it gonna cost as well if anyone can put a ball part figure on it?
Thanks people! X
Dunno what you Brits call those things, we Americans call 'em fountains. And, if you're wanting to save a little coin, why wait a few years, just take her into your shower, turn it on and ask her to get hitched.
If she turns ya down, at least you can shampoo her hair and proposefully slather some soap in her eyes. If she says yes...tie the knot (after you drill her under the shower head).
You can always purpose her on your 1st or 2nd marriage anniversary in Vegas, Catchy.
Constant Gardener
Masturbation is like procrastination, you think you're accomplishing something...but in the end, you're only fucking yourself.
Constant Gardener
Sounds like you need to do some Lush screen name harvesting.
Imagine the charge he'll get if you, "Give me that well made cock, Scooter!...fuck me like Buz does, my handsome man whore Martini!"
Change things up. Throw him curveballs, when he's expecting the slider over the outside of the plate. For a real treat, call him the names of his best buds, in between gagging mouthfuls of his erupting semen...you can always later say...
"My mom told me not to talk with my mouth full, babe."
Imagine the charge he'll get if you, "Give me that well made cock, Scooter!...fuck me like Buz does, my handsome man whore Martini!"
Change things up. Throw him curveballs, when he's expecting the slider over the outside of the plate. For a real treat, call him the names of his best buds, in between gagging mouthfuls of his erupting semen...you can always later say...
"My mom told me not to talk with my mouth full, babe."
Constant Gardener
Quote by benscrane
Hey Ben...do you think you can keep your child-porn Hentai off the forum pages. That's pretty disgusting, even to a pervert like myself.
Constant Gardener
Over a decade ago, I used to frequent a dance club/meat market, here locally.
Arriving around 9:30 pm, the place would be nearly packed and just starting to heat up. 350 men and women...some couples, mostly single/divorced people...all on display or on the make.
Good tunes, two big dance floors...friendly, responsive and helpful bartenders.
And generally there would always be the 38 yr old, petite, knockout brunette standing/posing near a waitress station at the near end of the horseshoe shaped, oak bar...with her sidekick...the equally jaw dropping, 6' tall, 33 yr old blonde. You could not help but notice them. They nearly always enjoyed/endured a swirl of masculine attention. There would be a constant stream of 25 to 45 year old men all dropping by to either try out a lame line, request a dance, purchase cocktails.
You've seen this before. Perhaps you've done it yourself!
I'd just take a position on the far side of the curved bar, almost directly across from them...with my back to the very back of the nightclub, so I and my running buddy...could view the entire scene.
And we'd watch those girls operate. They were viciously articulate and intelligent...and oh so coy.
Numerous times my friend or I would comment to each other... "Hey, watch this...She's about to drop a piano on that schmoe."
Then it would be anchors away and another one bit the dust. Damned funny entertainment.
The blonde approached me once as I was cutting across the lower dance floor after a song ended, to avoid the crush of humanity in the single aisle. I needed another Tanqueray, damnit!
"Are you and your friend just going to eyeball us all night again, or do you two prefer sucking dick to eating pussy?"
Of course she was hoping to provoke a blush or shocked expression and she had no idea to whom she was addressing...yet.
"My friend is a cocksman as well as I am...what we prefer is tag team fucking naughty-minded women. We find you and your friend quite attractive, but we're not quite sure that either one of you would enjoy a cock in your cunt and one in your mouth at the same time."
She did not blush, nor stammer, nor slap my face off.
Calmly and seductively, she murmured, "I'd like one in my ass too. My friend is the deep throat artist...I gag."
Smiling with my eyes, grinning with my voice, "Perhaps one of you will approach one of us later and request a dance. Show us your horizontal moves from a vertical perspective?"
And I slid by her, brushing her D cup breast with my right bicep. Very nice.
Five minutes later, Brett and I had a new Tanq & tonic and a Jack & Coke in front of us...courtesy of...
I never did hookup with either woman, but I have become great friends with the brunette over the years....sadly, the blonde...was a cancer victim about 6 years ago. In her sexual and sensual prime. I came to like the blonde...a great deal. Australian accent. She lived life large, and on her terms.
They were such fun to banter and flirt with. And to watch as they carved through the men who approached them.
Fond memories.
Arriving around 9:30 pm, the place would be nearly packed and just starting to heat up. 350 men and women...some couples, mostly single/divorced people...all on display or on the make.
Good tunes, two big dance floors...friendly, responsive and helpful bartenders.
And generally there would always be the 38 yr old, petite, knockout brunette standing/posing near a waitress station at the near end of the horseshoe shaped, oak bar...with her sidekick...the equally jaw dropping, 6' tall, 33 yr old blonde. You could not help but notice them. They nearly always enjoyed/endured a swirl of masculine attention. There would be a constant stream of 25 to 45 year old men all dropping by to either try out a lame line, request a dance, purchase cocktails.
You've seen this before. Perhaps you've done it yourself!
I'd just take a position on the far side of the curved bar, almost directly across from them...with my back to the very back of the nightclub, so I and my running buddy...could view the entire scene.
And we'd watch those girls operate. They were viciously articulate and intelligent...and oh so coy.
Numerous times my friend or I would comment to each other... "Hey, watch this...She's about to drop a piano on that schmoe."
Then it would be anchors away and another one bit the dust. Damned funny entertainment.
The blonde approached me once as I was cutting across the lower dance floor after a song ended, to avoid the crush of humanity in the single aisle. I needed another Tanqueray, damnit!
"Are you and your friend just going to eyeball us all night again, or do you two prefer sucking dick to eating pussy?"
Of course she was hoping to provoke a blush or shocked expression and she had no idea to whom she was addressing...yet.
"My friend is a cocksman as well as I am...what we prefer is tag team fucking naughty-minded women. We find you and your friend quite attractive, but we're not quite sure that either one of you would enjoy a cock in your cunt and one in your mouth at the same time."
She did not blush, nor stammer, nor slap my face off.
Calmly and seductively, she murmured, "I'd like one in my ass too. My friend is the deep throat artist...I gag."
Smiling with my eyes, grinning with my voice, "Perhaps one of you will approach one of us later and request a dance. Show us your horizontal moves from a vertical perspective?"
And I slid by her, brushing her D cup breast with my right bicep. Very nice.
Five minutes later, Brett and I had a new Tanq & tonic and a Jack & Coke in front of us...courtesy of...
I never did hookup with either woman, but I have become great friends with the brunette over the years....sadly, the blonde...was a cancer victim about 6 years ago. In her sexual and sensual prime. I came to like the blonde...a great deal. Australian accent. She lived life large, and on her terms.
They were such fun to banter and flirt with. And to watch as they carved through the men who approached them.
Fond memories.
Constant Gardener
Quote by Buz
Maybe you should cuckold his ass...or maybe not.
You're starting to mature, Grasshopper.
Kudos!
Constant Gardener
You should hear me sing...I could pull that off.
I gots Freddie's teef.
And voice.
He had a bit more hair than I do. But we can spray that shit on, anymore.
I gots Freddie's teef.
And voice.
He had a bit more hair than I do. But we can spray that shit on, anymore.
Constant Gardener
Quote by Buz
Veins? hmmmm..don't know about that.
Never noticed boob veins before either, Buz.
I gotta see some pix first to make this determination.
Constant Gardener
Quote by MissyLuvsYa
I was worried this forum subject was about all those men who scratch their ass and pick at it in public. That is not very attractive, don't do it!
Thanks for the visual, Missy.
Constant Gardener
It is: Shit or get off the pot... Not: Shit or get off my cot.
It is: He couldn't find his ass with both hands and a head start... or: He couldn't find his ass if you gave him directions... Not: He couldn't find his ass with his head up it.
It is: I'm busier than a one armed grocery bagger... Not: I'm busier than a one armed jerkoff artist.
I'll have a few more, later thish evening affter a few more brewskeze
It is: He couldn't find his ass with both hands and a head start... or: He couldn't find his ass if you gave him directions... Not: He couldn't find his ass with his head up it.
It is: I'm busier than a one armed grocery bagger... Not: I'm busier than a one armed jerkoff artist.
I'll have a few more, later thish evening affter a few more brewskeze
Constant Gardener
I could never purposefully write from a female's POV.
But I try to write sometimes...as just a human being. You ladies are humans, I think.
I hope that when I write, my gender does not come into play.
Lately, I've not written very much. But the urge is beginning to tickle me again.
But I try to write sometimes...as just a human being. You ladies are humans, I think.
I hope that when I write, my gender does not come into play.
Lately, I've not written very much. But the urge is beginning to tickle me again.
