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Woman
Over 90 days ago
Female, 105
China
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Darling Shameless... our craziness is what makes us interesting to the men of specials. Why deny it; our most attractive characteristic?
*skips away then wonders... I think I just called you a woman. Not "our" as in your and I, but the gender with the mountains on their chests!
*skips away then wonders... I think I just called you a woman. Not "our" as in your and I, but the gender with the mountains on their chests!
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I saw this.... and thought you might enjoy this Shameless!
A notable Gynecologist once said,
The best engine in the world is the vagina.
It can be started with one finger.
It is self lubricating.
It takes any size piston.
And it changes its own oil every four weeks.
"It is only a pity that the management system is so f**king temperamental."
A notable Gynecologist once said,
The best engine in the world is the vagina.
It can be started with one finger.
It is self lubricating.
It takes any size piston.
And it changes its own oil every four weeks.
"It is only a pity that the management system is so f**king temperamental."
Active Ink Slinger
I too must admit that I too enjoy Lush's chatroom!! The people that I have met in there, they are kind, friendly and so very welcoming. In my mind I saw it as the bar "Cheers" where everyone knows your name, and just a place to go and relax. And pushing all the buttons is always fun!!!!
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Quote by Lady_LydiaQuote by Mr_Sfstk8d
No. No heart attacks. That would be bad.
And I'm pretty sure the primary reason Beijing blocks porn is jealousy, akin to a systemic cultural penis inferiority complex. In other words, the wankers in the High Poombah Proletariate, or whatever Chairman Mao's current (old guy) octogenarian generation of commu-buddies are so horribly ashamed of their own paltry, unimpressive and underperforming dangly bits that they will vehemently fight to keep anyone they can excercise their "overcompensation" drive upon from access, even verbally, from any type of entertainment, education or social discussion that may remotely suggest that there are cocks in this world much more satisfacory in their design intent than theirs.
For those of you who had trouble following that, those old creepsters are jealous of others' penises, so they block them to make the straight women there forget what they're missing!
Those fartknockers! I never thought of it like that!!! (mutters about men and their dangly bits and other bad thoughts about tying them in a knot and throwing them over shoulders)
Now Eli darling. Put those thoughts away! You are forbidden from getting excited! *puts a post it note on your forehead with the words... tell her exciting thoughts in a very boring way. Is this possible?
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Oh it is fun you want darling Diversified? Might I suggest Fun Factory? It is a WHOLE factory designed for fun!!! And you might want to sit down, surrounded by pillows. Protect your head and all.
Never fear Fystee One! I am confident I will succeed! If not, I will call them all pookie and knit them all willie warmers.
Never fear Fystee One! I am confident I will succeed! If not, I will call them all pookie and knit them all willie warmers.
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by roccotool
Woman, can you get to a profile and then click a story from inside there? It might be a workaround.
Hey I didn't say reacharound.
I've tried that, and at the moment trying an IP changing whatchamacallit to see if that works. But they are sneaky on that Wall I tell you!!! It is like they KNOW what I want to do, and they are trying to spoil my fun!
*raises fist, shakes it at Beijing... you ninnies!
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*walks in wearing her fedora, using her walking cane and smoking a cigar singing... If you're blue and you don't know where to go to why don't you go where fashion sits puttin' on the Ritz....
Spots Diversified and Wifey, raise an eye brow with a fun idea. Whip cream for the ladies then a taste testing competition!!!!
Spots Diversified and Wifey, raise an eye brow with a fun idea. Whip cream for the ladies then a taste testing competition!!!!
Active Ink Slinger
Thought you all might get a chuckle!
Bob came home drunk one night, slid into bed beside his sleeping wife, and fell into a deep slumber..
He awoke before the Pearly Gates, where St. Peter said, 'You died in your sleep, Bob....'
Bob was stunned. 'I'm dead? No, I can't be! I've got too much to live for. Send me back!'
St. Peter said, 'I'm sorry, but there's only one way you can go back, and that is as a chicken.'
Bob was devastated, but begged St. Peter to send him to a farm near his home.... The next thing he knew, he was covered with feathers, clucking, and pecking the ground.
A rooster strolled past. 'So, you're the new hen, huh? How's your first day here?'
'Not bad,' replied Bob the hen, 'but I have this strange feeling inside. Like I'm gonna explode!'
'You're ovulating,' explained the rooster.
'Don't tell me you've never laid an egg before? '
'Never,' said Bob.
'Well, just relax and let it happen,' says the rooster. 'It's no big deal.'
Bob did, and a few uncomfortable seconds later, out popped an egg!
Bob was overcome with emotion as he experienced motherhood. He soon laid another egg -- his joy was overwhelming.
As he was about to lay his third egg, he felt a smack on the back of his head, and heard his wife yell.....
BOB, wake up. You shit the bed!'
Bob came home drunk one night, slid into bed beside his sleeping wife, and fell into a deep slumber..
He awoke before the Pearly Gates, where St. Peter said, 'You died in your sleep, Bob....'
Bob was stunned. 'I'm dead? No, I can't be! I've got too much to live for. Send me back!'
St. Peter said, 'I'm sorry, but there's only one way you can go back, and that is as a chicken.'
Bob was devastated, but begged St. Peter to send him to a farm near his home.... The next thing he knew, he was covered with feathers, clucking, and pecking the ground.
A rooster strolled past. 'So, you're the new hen, huh? How's your first day here?'
'Not bad,' replied Bob the hen, 'but I have this strange feeling inside. Like I'm gonna explode!'
'You're ovulating,' explained the rooster.
'Don't tell me you've never laid an egg before? '
'Never,' said Bob.
'Well, just relax and let it happen,' says the rooster. 'It's no big deal.'
Bob did, and a few uncomfortable seconds later, out popped an egg!
Bob was overcome with emotion as he experienced motherhood. He soon laid another egg -- his joy was overwhelming.
As he was about to lay his third egg, he felt a smack on the back of his head, and heard his wife yell.....
BOB, wake up. You shit the bed!'
Active Ink Slinger
I think the Mayans were trying to tell us all to mark our calendars to make sure we all knew that it was the last day on earth and how do you plan on it all ending? Personally, I do hope to be passed out exhausted from a week long marathon of sex, ticking off Boxes of various sexual positions. Go out with an orgasm? Can you imagine your conversation with Saint Peter?
Saint Peter; And you my child, how did you die?
Me; Well Saint Peter darling, you see? I was trying out various yoga poses while my boyfriend found ways of having his way with me.
Saint Peter; Are you telling me you died while having sex?
Me; I am indeed. I even got to finish.
Saint Peter; Gold star for you! And here are your wings and corset!
Saint Peter; And you my child, how did you die?
Me; Well Saint Peter darling, you see? I was trying out various yoga poses while my boyfriend found ways of having his way with me.
Saint Peter; Are you telling me you died while having sex?
Me; I am indeed. I even got to finish.
Saint Peter; Gold star for you! And here are your wings and corset!
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I just watched, "The Day the Earth Stood Still". I thought it pretty decent for a Keanu Reeves flick, but the ending? Just once, I'd like to see a movie where the world really does end. I wonder how well that would go over with the Box Office! And now we are off to watch reruns of REALLY old Saturday Night Live's!
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Not at all gentlemen!
It is so very possible! I just insist he wear my heels. That way, he'll never say; "Woman, why don't you wear high heels more often?" and my heels will get stretched out! I get to buy two cakes for the price of one!
Alas; it is very difficult to get him to come around to my way of thinking and getting him to wear my heels.
It is so very possible! I just insist he wear my heels. That way, he'll never say; "Woman, why don't you wear high heels more often?" and my heels will get stretched out! I get to buy two cakes for the price of one!
Alas; it is very difficult to get him to come around to my way of thinking and getting him to wear my heels.
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Quote by MrNudiePants
The tallest bikini model in the world is getting her first magazine cover.
The model, who goes by the name Amazon Eve will be featured on the cover of Australian magazine Zoo Weekly.
Eve, who stands just over 6'9" inches tall, had to have her bikini's for the photo shoot specially made.
Why is it tall women always seem to get the nick name "Amazon"? I wonder where she buys her shoes?
