Active Ink Slinger
Watch this KoolHandDuke, yes I've read your private message. Cheers.
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marcosurbina
Over 90 days ago
Male, 75
Mexico
Forum
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by Art69
Kiwi star Gina Bellman - from Coupling and Leverage; both really excellent shows.
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Quote by KoolHandDuke
Marco i knew i could count on you to offer a nice ass to brighten the day.
Yes, I'm here to brighten the day indeed. Watch this.
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While I'm typing my erotic stories on my computer I'm listening to classic music on You Tube.
Pitty you can't shift from one button to the other. I can foresee a problem in this computer on pic above: YOU CAN'T PLAY TWO FUNCTIONS AT THE SAME TIME. Either porn or music. I need both.OkrKhElaivQDV65L
Pitty you can't shift from one button to the other. I can foresee a problem in this computer on pic above: YOU CAN'T PLAY TWO FUNCTIONS AT THE SAME TIME. Either porn or music. I need both.OkrKhElaivQDV65L
Active Ink Slinger
This is how my girl friend pulled the wool on my eyes!!
No more worry about losing your virginity. With this product, you can have your first night back anytime. Insert this artificial hymen into your vagina carefully. It will expand a little and make you feel tight. When your lover penetrate, it will ooze out a liquid that look like blood not too much but just the right amount. Add in a few moans and groans, you will pass through undetectable. Its easy to use.
No more worry about losing your virginity. With this product, you can have your first night back anytime. Insert this artificial hymen into your vagina carefully. It will expand a little and make you feel tight. When your lover penetrate, it will ooze out a liquid that look like blood not too much but just the right amount. Add in a few moans and groans, you will pass through undetectable. Its easy to use.
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Take me home and screw me all night long!
An artificial vagina designed for collecting semen will imitate some or all of the anatomical features and behaviours of woman's vagina. An artificial vagina for the purposes of sexual stimulation is essentially an aid to human masturbation: it is designed to simulate the sensation of sexual intercourse on the erect penis. It will often have moving parts such as vibrators that increase stimulation rather than accurately simulating a woman's vagina.
Usually the artificial vagina has a realistic or close to realistic appearance with a sleeve, where the penis can be inserted. The sleeve, or as it is also called "vaginal tunnel", measures in average from 10 to 20 centimetres (4 to 8 inches) and can have an open end for inserting vibrating bullet, if the user wishes.
The elastic properties of all materials that are used in manufacturing artificial vaginas are combined with a porous nature and therefore vaginas require special care to avoid bacterial accumulation. Manufacturers recommend protecting them by applying a condom during use.
An artificial vagina designed for collecting semen will imitate some or all of the anatomical features and behaviours of woman's vagina. An artificial vagina for the purposes of sexual stimulation is essentially an aid to human masturbation: it is designed to simulate the sensation of sexual intercourse on the erect penis. It will often have moving parts such as vibrators that increase stimulation rather than accurately simulating a woman's vagina.
Usually the artificial vagina has a realistic or close to realistic appearance with a sleeve, where the penis can be inserted. The sleeve, or as it is also called "vaginal tunnel", measures in average from 10 to 20 centimetres (4 to 8 inches) and can have an open end for inserting vibrating bullet, if the user wishes.
The elastic properties of all materials that are used in manufacturing artificial vaginas are combined with a porous nature and therefore vaginas require special care to avoid bacterial accumulation. Manufacturers recommend protecting them by applying a condom during use.
Active Ink Slinger
Well, I wish to match Bunny12 with my new entry. Bunny12 is excelent though, but I compare this to a volley ball contest: bubbles to one side, then back to the other side of net.
Active Ink Slinger
Warning Signs that you Might Need a Different Lawyer:
A prison guard is shaving your head.
%%%%%%%%%%%%
A reporter went in to a prison to to report on conditions there. He was standing in the chow hall, next to a guard. All the prisoners were silently eating their grub.
All of a sudden one of the prisoners shouted “24!”. All of the other prisoners started to laugh.
A minute later another prisoner shouted “77!”. Once again, the other prisoners laughed.
The reporter was a little puzzled by this, so he asked the guard about it.
The guard explained that it was against the rules to tell jokes in the chow hall. So, the prisoners assigned numbers to all the jokes they knew. When someone shouted a number, everyone would be reminded of the joke, and laugh.
The reporter thought that was pretty cool, so he decided to try it out for himself.
“37!”, he shouted.
Silence. Blank stares.
“Some people just can’t tell a joke”, said the guard.
—punchline #2—
Another prisoner then shouted “89!”
The guard busted out in laughter. His eyes started to water, and he turned red from laughing so hard.
The reporter asked him what was so funny.
“I’ve never heard that one before!” said the guard.
A prison guard is shaving your head.
%%%%%%%%%%%%
A reporter went in to a prison to to report on conditions there. He was standing in the chow hall, next to a guard. All the prisoners were silently eating their grub.
All of a sudden one of the prisoners shouted “24!”. All of the other prisoners started to laugh.
A minute later another prisoner shouted “77!”. Once again, the other prisoners laughed.
The reporter was a little puzzled by this, so he asked the guard about it.
The guard explained that it was against the rules to tell jokes in the chow hall. So, the prisoners assigned numbers to all the jokes they knew. When someone shouted a number, everyone would be reminded of the joke, and laugh.
The reporter thought that was pretty cool, so he decided to try it out for himself.
“37!”, he shouted.
Silence. Blank stares.
“Some people just can’t tell a joke”, said the guard.
—punchline #2—
Another prisoner then shouted “89!”
The guard busted out in laughter. His eyes started to water, and he turned red from laughing so hard.
The reporter asked him what was so funny.
“I’ve never heard that one before!” said the guard.
Active Ink Slinger
There is a man that just got done eating dinner and he was on his way to a party. Half way there he said, "man I really gotta take a dump." He got off the freeway, found an abandoned gas station went in there and took a dump.
While he was taking this dump he read a sign that said "There is no tolet paper... You have wipe your ass with your first two fingers, then stick them out the hole and they will be licked clean for you."
Well, he had no choice so he wiped his ass with his fingers and stuck them out the hole. All of a sudden a guy with two bricks smacked his fingers. The man screamed with pain and licked his own fingers.
While he was taking this dump he read a sign that said "There is no tolet paper... You have wipe your ass with your first two fingers, then stick them out the hole and they will be licked clean for you."
Well, he had no choice so he wiped his ass with his fingers and stuck them out the hole. All of a sudden a guy with two bricks smacked his fingers. The man screamed with pain and licked his own fingers.
Active Ink Slinger
Yeah, it is unnatural. She just wear eye liner and that is it. She doesn't want to go out and look a hot mess.
Active Ink Slinger
The whole Latin America, used to import laborers by the thousands, between 1500 and 1950, corresponding to a four and a half centuries lapse, receiving large labor contingents, landing in this continent, to undertake the big exploitation of this territory as well as its multiple wealth laying down, and growing underneath.
European conquerors fought native inhabitants, Indians, making them disappear by means of a genocidal proceed involved at conquering the new land, but at the same time, had to resort to imported laborers, thus becoming a fine way of extracting riches and wealth efficiently out of this continent, an attractive offer difficult to ignore.
For the first time in history it was demonstrated how labor is treated like merchandise, commodities and possessions, a characteristic too evident in America, as slaves were subject to be traded with a value at market. Years later, advance, progress and betterment arrived to Ibero America, together with a slave market brought from Spain that would begin to operate in these lands, already in practice since time back in Senegal as well as in Guinea, in the western coast of Africa.
This is about a slave market predestined, bound to America, then offered as merchandise to a variety of adventurers who had come to America between 1500 and 1750, I reckon. This trade would had been impossible without the cooperation of traffickers indeed, who tied up slaves in Dakar shores and Lagos, so be dispatched, facilitated and be shipped to America.
The Portuguese were the first European settlers to arrive in the area, today known as Brazil, led by adventurous Pedro Cabral, who began the colonial period in 1500. Little did Pedro know he was planting the seeds the most beautiful women, the likes of which have never before been seen on this Planet?
Unlike the colonizing philosophy of the Spanish, the Portuguese in Brazil were much less focused at first on conquering, controlling, and developing the country. Most were impoverished sailors, who were far more interested in profitable trade and subsistence agriculture than in territorial expansion. Nonetheless, sugar soon came to Brazil, and with it came imported slaves. To a degree unequaled in most of the American colonies, the Portuguese settlers frequently intermarried with both the Indians and the African slaves, and there were also mixed marriages between the Africans and Indians.
Spain was interested in the same types of trade as Portugal and purchased slave labor from the Portuguese to work the sugar plantations in its Caribbean holdings. Slavery was abolished at the beginning of XlX century, say, slave trade, but this institution continued to exist through the end of that century until it wasn’t practiced anymore. It sprouted and grew to reach international status because America had to be colonized and populated yet further more.
Historian Alberto Adriani maintains that between the years 1850 and 1932 flowed more than ten million immigrants into Latin America. A good example today of modern immigrants would be Argentina, Uruguay and Chile as a result of European immigration landing on these beaches between 1800 and 1930.
Also Brazil has been a result of a copious immigration to America from Europe as well as it is Cuba in the Caribbean. Most Brazilians possess some combination of European, African, Amerindian, Asian, and Middle Eastern lineage, and this multiplicity of cultural legacies is a notable feature of current Brazilian culture, and still today Iberian or Italic immigrants are flowing into this America behind foot-print’s predecessors from past centuries.
However, things have changed now, seeing that Latin America has always been stricken by unemployment ranging from Mexico City to Buenos Aires, making a stop at Caracas. In these countries, workmanship has had no other choice than to flee, escape, their inhabitants migrating on a different trend.
We would wonder and speculate, who endured better, or had a better status, slaves in 1750 or the marginal poor in the shantytowns on Caracas outskirts today?
Answer: slaves did, regardless of treat badly, abused and lashed by the cruel relentless foreman. His status was better than a marginal person of Caracas’ slums today, despite of Independence and liberty achieved along with freedom. Their income and profits have failed to get to him today in 2010, within current contemporary society.
Simon Bolivar, a liberator with a swift, imaginative, artistic mind was quoted as saying:
“The only profit we’ve achieved to now has been independence, while a dominant tyrannical and prevailing minority is well off still living in this native land.”
Perhaps this is the reason for millions of Latin Americans to have settled and taken a root in Europe and North America? While immigrants had been landing to this soil since centuries ago, things have changed and we are the ones who are forced to emigrate on this day and age!!
Diego de Lozada, Caracas' founder
A metallic helmet, used approximately in the 17th century by Spanish conquerors in America. It's in the Museo del Carmen, Maipú, Santiago de Chile.
Extreme Rich-Poor Divides
European conquerors fought native inhabitants, Indians, making them disappear by means of a genocidal proceed involved at conquering the new land, but at the same time, had to resort to imported laborers, thus becoming a fine way of extracting riches and wealth efficiently out of this continent, an attractive offer difficult to ignore.
For the first time in history it was demonstrated how labor is treated like merchandise, commodities and possessions, a characteristic too evident in America, as slaves were subject to be traded with a value at market. Years later, advance, progress and betterment arrived to Ibero America, together with a slave market brought from Spain that would begin to operate in these lands, already in practice since time back in Senegal as well as in Guinea, in the western coast of Africa.
This is about a slave market predestined, bound to America, then offered as merchandise to a variety of adventurers who had come to America between 1500 and 1750, I reckon. This trade would had been impossible without the cooperation of traffickers indeed, who tied up slaves in Dakar shores and Lagos, so be dispatched, facilitated and be shipped to America.
The Portuguese were the first European settlers to arrive in the area, today known as Brazil, led by adventurous Pedro Cabral, who began the colonial period in 1500. Little did Pedro know he was planting the seeds the most beautiful women, the likes of which have never before been seen on this Planet?
Unlike the colonizing philosophy of the Spanish, the Portuguese in Brazil were much less focused at first on conquering, controlling, and developing the country. Most were impoverished sailors, who were far more interested in profitable trade and subsistence agriculture than in territorial expansion. Nonetheless, sugar soon came to Brazil, and with it came imported slaves. To a degree unequaled in most of the American colonies, the Portuguese settlers frequently intermarried with both the Indians and the African slaves, and there were also mixed marriages between the Africans and Indians.
Spain was interested in the same types of trade as Portugal and purchased slave labor from the Portuguese to work the sugar plantations in its Caribbean holdings. Slavery was abolished at the beginning of XlX century, say, slave trade, but this institution continued to exist through the end of that century until it wasn’t practiced anymore. It sprouted and grew to reach international status because America had to be colonized and populated yet further more.
Historian Alberto Adriani maintains that between the years 1850 and 1932 flowed more than ten million immigrants into Latin America. A good example today of modern immigrants would be Argentina, Uruguay and Chile as a result of European immigration landing on these beaches between 1800 and 1930.
Also Brazil has been a result of a copious immigration to America from Europe as well as it is Cuba in the Caribbean. Most Brazilians possess some combination of European, African, Amerindian, Asian, and Middle Eastern lineage, and this multiplicity of cultural legacies is a notable feature of current Brazilian culture, and still today Iberian or Italic immigrants are flowing into this America behind foot-print’s predecessors from past centuries.
However, things have changed now, seeing that Latin America has always been stricken by unemployment ranging from Mexico City to Buenos Aires, making a stop at Caracas. In these countries, workmanship has had no other choice than to flee, escape, their inhabitants migrating on a different trend.
We would wonder and speculate, who endured better, or had a better status, slaves in 1750 or the marginal poor in the shantytowns on Caracas outskirts today?
Answer: slaves did, regardless of treat badly, abused and lashed by the cruel relentless foreman. His status was better than a marginal person of Caracas’ slums today, despite of Independence and liberty achieved along with freedom. Their income and profits have failed to get to him today in 2010, within current contemporary society.
Simon Bolivar, a liberator with a swift, imaginative, artistic mind was quoted as saying:
“The only profit we’ve achieved to now has been independence, while a dominant tyrannical and prevailing minority is well off still living in this native land.”
Perhaps this is the reason for millions of Latin Americans to have settled and taken a root in Europe and North America? While immigrants had been landing to this soil since centuries ago, things have changed and we are the ones who are forced to emigrate on this day and age!!
Diego de Lozada, Caracas' founder
A metallic helmet, used approximately in the 17th century by Spanish conquerors in America. It's in the Museo del Carmen, Maipú, Santiago de Chile.
Extreme Rich-Poor Divides
Active Ink Slinger
In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman. Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.
%%%%%%%%%%%%%
The teacher asks the class to write a short composition dealing with four major subjects: religion, nobility, sex and mystery. In a flash, Anna 's hand shoots up. Amazed at the rapid response, the teacher asks her to read her piece out loud.
"'Oh my God!' exclaimed the countess, 'I'm pregnant, and I don't know by whom.'"
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman. Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.
%%%%%%%%%%%%%
The teacher asks the class to write a short composition dealing with four major subjects: religion, nobility, sex and mystery. In a flash, Anna 's hand shoots up. Amazed at the rapid response, the teacher asks her to read her piece out loud.
"'Oh my God!' exclaimed the countess, 'I'm pregnant, and I don't know by whom.'"
Active Ink Slinger
Well, jackinandjillin, thank you for reading. I didn't get the first one but on the second one joke, it came to my mind that saying in Spanish (English is not my first language).
God says: "Ayudate que yo te ayudaré." I always do this.
God says: "Ayudate que yo te ayudaré." I always do this.
Active Ink Slinger
A dog ran into a butcher shop and grabbed a roast off the counter. Fortunately, the butcher recognized the dog as belonging to aneighbour of his. The neighbour happened to be a lawyer. Incensedat the theft, the butcher called up his neighbour and said, "Hey,if your dog stole a roast from my butcher shop, would you be liablefor the cost of the meat?"
The lawyer replied, "Of course, how muchwas the roast?"
"$7.98."
A few days later the butcher received a check in the mail for $7.98. Attached to it was an invoice that read:
"Legal Consultation Service: $150."
The lawyer replied, "Of course, how muchwas the roast?"
"$7.98."
A few days later the butcher received a check in the mail for $7.98. Attached to it was an invoice that read:
"Legal Consultation Service: $150."
Active Ink Slinger
Which of the following does not belong?
(a) meat (b) eggs (c) wife (d) blow job
(d) A blowjob because it's possible to beat your meat, your eggs or your wife, but you can't beat a blowjob
(a) meat (b) eggs (c) wife (d) blow job
(d) A blowjob because it's possible to beat your meat, your eggs or your wife, but you can't beat a blowjob
Active Ink Slinger
sexynsweet09: I can't see your pic, just an "X"
In the meantime, I'm complaining about this girl's panties. I wish I could see real panties.
Real panties
Not this!!
...or this!!
In the meantime, I'm complaining about this girl's panties. I wish I could see real panties.
Real panties
Not this!!
...or this!!
Active Ink Slinger
Thrust reversal, also called reverse thrust, is the temporary diversion of an aircraft engine's exhaust or changing of propeller pitch so that the thrust produced is directed forward, rather than aft. This acts against the forward travel of the aircraft, providing deceleration. Thrust reversers are used by many jet aircraft to help slow down just after touch-down, reducing wear on the brakes and enabling shorter landing distances. It is also available on many propeller aircraft through reversing the controllable pitch propellers to a negative angle.
Once the aircraft's speed has slowed, thrust reverse is shut down to prevent the reversed airflow from raising debris in front of the engine intakes where it can be ingested, causing foreign object damage.
Once the aircraft's speed has slowed, thrust reverse is shut down to prevent the reversed airflow from raising debris in front of the engine intakes where it can be ingested, causing foreign object damage.
Active Ink Slinger
Mercy Shammeless: is tha a Chevrolet C/70? I've saved that pic, the best I've ever seen in my lifetime!!
Active Ink Slinger
Q: What is the ideal cockpit crew?
A: A pilot and a dog...the pilot is there to feed the dog, and the dog is there to bite the pilot in case he tries to touch anything.
Q: How many pilots does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Just one. He holds the bulb and the world revolves around him.
Q: How do you know if a pilot is at your party?
A: He'll tell you.
Q: How do you know when you are half way through a date with a pilot?
A: Because he says: "Thats enough about flying, let's talk about me"!
Q: What's the purpose of the propeller?
A: To keep the pilot cool. If you don't think so, just stop it and watch him sweat!
A: A pilot and a dog...the pilot is there to feed the dog, and the dog is there to bite the pilot in case he tries to touch anything.
Q: How many pilots does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Just one. He holds the bulb and the world revolves around him.
Q: How do you know if a pilot is at your party?
A: He'll tell you.
Q: How do you know when you are half way through a date with a pilot?
A: Because he says: "Thats enough about flying, let's talk about me"!
Q: What's the purpose of the propeller?
A: To keep the pilot cool. If you don't think so, just stop it and watch him sweat!