The feeling of being held was more than his cock could bear.

There was a tight cocksman from Spain

Who experienced somewhat of a pain

‘Twas because of the clap

Because of a mishap

A horny young man had a three day pass

And he spent it all pronging a lass

Then had a shower

And emerged quite sour

Because his shampoo had gone up his ass!

There was a tight cocksman from Spain

A horny young man had a three day pass

And he spent it all pronging a lass

A nymphomaniacal slut

Was fully enthralled with his butt

She leaned down just to kiss it

But decided to miss it

It depends on where you are.

Favorite artwork?

So she jumped into bed with a guy name of Fred

“Learn the format of limericks,” he said

She replied "It's too complicated.

An so I've abdicated,”

And with that she returned to his head.

There once was a sailor from Tulsa

Mall.

Masturbation or sex?

After

Party

As a Mistress she was rather strict

And her girls were carefully picked

She loved them all

And when she gave the call

City.

Naked or clothed?

Binge.

Walk or run?

She dragged her finger up his cock, quivering as she finished

All she could hear was the soft ticking of her hand inside herself

Meeting just above

The rush of hair, the cleft—

Hands moving down

There once was a lad from Cork

Whose schlong had three prongs like a fork

The silky dark notch

The cheeses, the wine, the grapes

The physical ache

Artist

Patrons

Dinosaur penii

Stay hard for one thousand years

Then: Vesuvius!

Rob is known for his love of tits

Which results in stiff'ning his bits.

When deep cleavage is near,

Back and forth all night

The eternal sex machine

Grinds out its product

What’s my chance of getting a modest crepe around here?

There once was a shipper of rum

Who used to say “ouch” when he’d cum.

One day he said “ouch”

40 times on his couch!

And after that day he kept mum

There once was a bounder from Wye

Who got his hand stuck in his fly

As he twisted and pulled

A new feeling took hold

And he said to himself, “My, my, my…”

There once was a lady from Flushing

whose bush needed thrice-daily brushing.

One day her brush broke,

and her pussy, it spoke,

and it said, “Please god stop, I am gushing!”

Plain bar

Flat or still?

A man with persistent priapic erection

Could not squash it in any direction

Strawberrry!

Junior Mints or cherry sours?

Steak

Lemonade or ice tea?

Cruise

dreamer or realist?