Quote by ChuckEPoo
This is a great question. I applaud you for maintaining a faithful monogamous marriage. We've been married 22 years with two of those years open. I can truthfully say that once you step over the line that it is hard to go back. We've had mixed reviews. First of all, no matter what people say the risks are high. The other thing is that unless your marriage is rock solid don't concider it.
However it really is not cheating. It is quite the opposite. We were not different than most couples. Sex and love were interchangeable. But after an infidelity on both our sides we discovered through therapy that our love for each other had not dimished. Now we have more trust and confidence in us as a couple than ever before. There is no temptation to cheat, and our relationship is open and honest.
Another thing is that if you choose to have an open marriage, it doesn't necessarily mean sex with others. It can mean something as simple as openly discussing one another's fantasies without judgment. When we did this we were amazed we found out we had more in common than we ever knew. So now we don't suppress anything.
The risks though are astronomical. That is why they have swingers clubs in virtually every town. It lessens the Heath risks with all being tested. Does jealousy exist? Of course. It is basic nature.
It's the fantasy of what so many writers fantasize about I caution. Picking up strangers is not only risky on the health side but on the relational side too. What happens when some random wacko starts stalking your wife or husband. It happened to us. Some of the scariest times of our life.
Most psychologists will rightfully steer you away from open marriage. The failure rate is beyond traditional marriage. If it were possible to step back... We probably would. But as I said... When you step over that line it is a giant leap.
btw, for the record? i'd totally do your wife. just in case... *grins*
