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sprite
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sprite
Her Royal Spriteness
Quote by AngelHeart01
Quote by Magical_felix
Quote by AngelHeart01
Quote by Magical_felix
Quote by mazza
Quote by magnificent1rascal
I too like reading my friends' latest blog posts.

p.s. — I think Groups will be a great addition.


Oh I think groups would be good too... For the people you chat with most...


But, but then the fact that I have very little friends that will talk to me will be exposed and I'll be embarrassed and ashamed.


Yeah, I'd be embarrassed if I was you too. ♥


I know... Like my only friend in my group would be fuckin' Analheart. So Lame...


Says YOU! I wouldn't even be in the group ... POW!


you two cut it out. if you can't get along, i'm going to have to separate you!
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sprite
Her Royal Spriteness
Quote by DirtyMartini
Quote by gav
or do some people like reading the last blog entry for all your friends in one view?




Personally, I like it the way it is...there's a few whose blog entries I find entertaining...not sure I see how eliminating the blog entry would be really be an improvement in any way...


I hate to admit this, but i agree with Alan - i like kind of having an idea of what is going on in my friends life, so i can sort of shoot notes their way or just keep in touch or whatever - it actually gets a lot of heavy use when i sign on here, just opening up the blog's only section for friends smile
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sprite
Her Royal Spriteness
Screw the profile, just wanted to say something about Dude WHO is one of the funnest, sweetest, sexiest, nicest guys here on Lush smile oh, and he has a profile. it's umm... well, it's his! *giggles*
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sprite
Her Royal Spriteness
Quote by nicola
I lent my copy to someone and have never seen it since. However, the interwebs were at my fingertips:

We were somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert when the drugs began to take hold. I remember saying something like "I feel a bit lightheaded; maybe you should drive..." And suddenly there was a terrible roar all around us and the sky was full of what looked like huge bats, all swooping and screeching and diving around the car, which was going about a hundred miles an hour with the top down to Las Vegas. And a voice was screaming: "Holy Jesus! What are these goddamn animals?"


It wasn't me! I just realized i can't find MY copy either! Damn those thieviing fairies! for the record? best opening line ever!
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sprite
Her Royal Spriteness
First off, thank you MistressS for allowing me to occasionally hi-jack your thread. smile

A few things i want to add, or rather, reinforce, on your punishment thread. From personal experience, the real punishment is breaking a rule or giving my Mistress a reason to punish me. As i said, we are unique pertaining to this subject, not being a full time D/s couple, but for the sake of this thread, i will be referring to her as my Mistress, something people close to me might find strange (usually she is" K, Kate, the wife, or the girl") Knowing that i broke a rule is an awful feeling. What comes after pales in comparison to that awful feeling that i messed up, that i gave her a reason to be disappointed or hurt.

btw, I have anger issues. Not obvious, perhaps, but yeah, they exist. Being the s equation of D/s helps me deal with them. I have rules that i have agreed on (that i tend to push at all too often) and that are very well defined and clear. D/s couples NEED rules. Dom/mes should never be arbitrarily punishing their subs because they feel like it, are having a bad day, are frustrated or angry, etc - that's wandering into the realm of abuse. Rather, in a good relationship a sub will know when she's pushing the bounderies, bending, or breaking a rule. There should be no doubt in her mind.

Speaking for myself, i turn myself in when i do. there's no trying to get away with it, trying to put one over on my Domme. its' all about trust. My Mistress trusts me to be honest with her, and it's very important to me to live up to that trust. After that, we sit down and calmly discuss the situation. although one or both of us might be cranky, things rarely get heated, we work it out and decide how to proceed. If i think the situation is unfair, i speak up and she takes that into consideration and i am punished. Afterwards, i feel clean. We move on, the issue was addressed, taken care of, and my Mistress knows that i will do my best not to repeat whatever behavior i was punished for.
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sprite
Her Royal Spriteness
Quote by shadowcat
I am very new to the BDSM scene, but i know i need to be submissive. I have spoken to a few people and they all have differing ideas on what they want from their Sub. However they all agree that a Dom/Sub relationship can not be conducted on line. Anybody agree/disagree. This is a part of my life i want to explore but am clueless as to what i do next, how i find a Master etc. Any advice wouls be much appreciated. Thanks


Online bdsm can work. in fact, in my opinion, it's not a bad way to learn about yourself and your needs. there are a number of couples here that i hope will chime in about online relationships, cause their are some successful ones. as in any relationship, yes, an offline one is preferable, but not always possible. smile my suggestion, don't settle for the first Master who comes along - test the waters, make it a trial basis - not everyone is a good fit - make sure you both agree to what you want out of it. remember, as a sub, if it's not working for you, it's your responsibility to make sure your Master knows that you need certain things or that some things aren't comfortable for you. you have to speak up sometimes. being a sub isn't about mindlessly accepting everything. smile
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sprite
Her Royal Spriteness
Quote by rxtales


To add to oint number 4: Trust is a massive part of a D/s relationship, and discussing things like limits is very important. Just because you are submissive to someone doesn´t mean that they can do anything to you. Boundaries are really important. It´s a two way street. A sub should respect their Dominant´s boundaries as well.



This brings up another point. Topping from the bottom. Some subs tend to try to wrestle control, sort of direct their Dom/mes. it can be subtle. One of the things that needs to be established right away is what a Dommes limits are as well. Just as your Master shouldn't be doing anything to you that you aren't willing to submit to, you shouldn't be pushing him to do things to you that he's not comfortable with - it's disrespectful, not just in a D/s context, but in a humanistic one to.

As i admitted earlier, i am a pain-slut, something which my Mistress is not comfortable with. Hence, it's not something we play with very often. in fact, it's very rare. I respect that and i don't push her in that regard. i have also been very careful about being honest when i am having those need and not going outside of the relationship to fulfill them. Trust and honesty are very big factors in D/s relationships. And both Dom/me and sub should have a safe word if they find themselves in uncomfortable territory.
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sprite
Her Royal Spriteness
Quote by mikeinsc


As far as what is seen on here that Jersey brought up about all the jumping around from Top to Top, either the submissive is new to the lifestyle and hasnt been trained or instructed well enough, or they are just playing out a fantasy which is what this site and some others are for, those in the lifestyle have and will recognized these people, and should instruct them when they can, if the said person isnt up to the instruction, they should just let it go, this is a adult site where people can choose for themselves, no one should be berated for choosing to indulge in a fantasy, the lifestyle community is small, the ones in it should be able to find someone who embraces it, like Forrest Gump mother said...stupid is as stupid does..



One of the nice things about being online is the chance to experiment and try out things in a safe enviornment. Just as some people are bi-curious, some are bdsm curious and i encourage those who are to explore that side of themselves in the relative anonimity of the online world. who knows, you may end up finding a perfect fit for yourselves! smile
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sprite
Her Royal Spriteness
Quote by olderthandirt
I am a relatively new to BDSM and coming in I had different expectations which my Mistress set straight intimidatingly. I admit I am hardheaded and need a special woman to corral me in Mistress has used several ways to discipline me. Right of the bat Mistress threatened to drop me as her sub. I was panicking that Mistress would follow through this turned out to be the first way to Sprite said to focus me and it worked. Yes Mistress has punished me with pain and I deserved i but more often Mistress has used other means cutting of Lush is one that is very effective. Using pain is not always the best means to punish me ( I like pain to much). I have a Mistress that is perfect in my mind for me. Mistress is making me a better person, man, and lover. I follow my Mistress in ever rule she lays down for me. Respect and trust is foremost in a D/s role. I trust my Mistress with my better being and care.


One thing this brings up. A lot of subs end up taking on Dom/mes because they get desperate and NEED that relationship, just like "ordinary couples" often form for fear of being single or alone. As with any relationship, the best ones are ones where the sub finds a Dom/me whose style FITS them. I should point out that this is not always going to be a romantic pairing. Sometimes that changes, sometimes not. Nor is is always sexual. Often, a sub just needs to be able to turn over control (remember what i said about choice!) to someone to help them focus or to find their comfort zone or as a way of letting go. I've talked to people who used being a sub as a way to relax and let go, people who work at high pressure, stressful jobs where they need to make decisions and be in charge, and they need a break from that and someone to tell them what to do sometimes. It allows them to explore that other side of themselves.

one other thing. I think we girls have it easier. it's a little more "natural" for being to see us being subs. Men tend to look at other guys who enter the lifestyle and see sissies or wimps. In fact, the opposite it true. The courage that it takes to be out as a sub if you are a guy is astonishing in my opinion. you're setting yourself up for all sorts of ridicule. Any men out there who are subs? I salute you and admire you. Don't let anyone tell you that you are not courageous, beautiful beings.

Once again, this is not definative, just the view thru the eyes of a sub. smile
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sprite
Her Royal Spriteness
Ok, as many of you might know, i am not the most organized of people, so you're getting what you're getting as i think about it. As i said before, i am a sub and everything i put forth is from my viewpoint. Hopefully, the Masters and Mistresses will be sharing their feelings as well.

A word about punishments. One thing that needs to be established early on is what really are punishments and what are punishable offences. Everyone Dom/me-sub couple is unique and probably will have different answers. Some subs hate being spanked and it works as a punishment. Some enjoy it and it becomes a game, often a playful one, to see if they can get spanked. When i can sit down and put it into words, i'll talk about the reasons that punishment are important in a D/s relationship and why, despite what it looks like from the outside, it's not abusive and actually beneficial to the sub.

For me, true punishment is never physical. The worst thing my Mistress can do to me, the one thing that get her point across is ignoring me. A typical punishment session. We sit down and talk about what i've done that deserves to be punished and what is an appropriate punishment. As i said, my relationship is not typical of the life style, so we may be unique, even among D/s couples.

A typical punishment is a time out. A time out consists of kneeling on the bedroom floor, my nose pressing a dime against the wall (which i am not allowed to let fall) for a specified amount of time during which my Mistress sits behind me on the bed and reads. I hate it. that said, it also allows me to focus. Quiet time, she calls it, and it's good for both of us. She gets a break from my craziness (if i'm being punished, there is usually craziness going on) and i get a break from it as well... it became a form of meditation which settles my brain a little. Like i said, i hate it, at least going in, but i won't argue the fact that it's beneficial to me. Other forms of punishment often used are taking away something treasured (such as on time line on Lush smile ), denial of orgasms (be it hours, days, or even weeks), taking away shopping or movie priviledges, etc.

One of the main reasons, btw, that i do NOT enjoy being punished, is not he punishment. it's that i put my Mistress in a position where she felt the need to punish me. It's not something she enjoys, most don't, and i am truly contrite for my actions.

hope that helps a bit. btw? i am making myself available either her, or thru messages, to answer questions. I don't claim to be an authority, but i think i have a good idea of the basics for any one curious to learn more for whatever reason about BDSM.
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sprite
Her Royal Spriteness
One more item: As MistressS said, it's not about pain. a lot of D/s relationships don't have elements of pain attached to them, or, if they do, it tends to be mild. Good Dom/mes don't enjoy spanking, etc their subs and, if forced to do so as an extreme punishment, it's as hurtful to them as the sub (which, as a sub, is a punishment in itself, knowing that they are forcing their Dom into doing something they don't like - see? it's complicated!). That said, this is not always true. i identify as a pain slut. i like it, it gets me off. not extreme pain... well, some of you might think so, but i don't see it as such, but a lot more then most of you would find reasonable. That said, i volenteer to take on questions or what have you on the subject if anyone has them as well as post my feeling on it from time to time.
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sprite
Her Royal Spriteness
Thank you, MistressS for starting this thread. It's been something I've been threatening to do for a while now. Forces my hand, so to speak. I'm going to try to post in bite sized increments, seeing as how i have a lot to say on the subject.

A little back ground for everyone. i identify as a sub. i've been involved in a total of 4 D/s relationships, the most recent one being somewhat unconventional. My current partner/wife/owner/Mistress is also my best friend and unlike many of the people 'in the life' we don't practice a full time Mistress/pet relationship. Personally, if she felt comfortable with that, i would agree, but one thing i hope people realize, being a Dom/me is not all fun and games. it's a lot of responsibility and a lot of work at time. Rewarding, yes - after all, it is a labor of love, but still, it's not always easy.

ok, Sprite's topic of the day : Control. I am cheating, using a previous post from a less viewed thread, but it's one i stand by and needs to be a part of this. remember, this is all through my eyes as a submissive woman.


Control. now here's an eye opener - a lot of subs who are into D/s? it's all about having control rather than giving it up. we have a CHOICE, we choose our partner, who we decide to relinquish control to, we trust them, GOOD D/s relationships have a serious of red/yellow/and green lights in them - certain things that we can trust our Dom/mes to either do to us, be careful about, or NEVER subject us to. and we have the ability to put a stop to anything that makes us uncomfortable with the use of a safe word. total control over what is done to us and, for many of us, that is very important.

i have been in relationships where i lost control, where it was taken from me - i think, because of this, i am more drawn to elements of bdsm, not despite it. it's good to know that you have a Dom/me who will take care of you, look out for your safety, protect you and yes, sexually stimulate you as well.

You can usually tell when i am feeling insecure or unloved or stressed out. i tend to fall back into a more submissive nature, one that often times bleeds over online. And, when i am feeling loved, secure, happy? that's when i tend to be a little bit more bouncy or bratty, as some might describe it. smile

ok, that's today's lesson, boys and girls. No homework for today but look out for a pop quiz on friday! ;)
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sprite
Her Royal Spriteness
Quote by Nikki703

Me and my GF occaisionally will have a threesome with a guy friend but it is just sex, nothing more. We try to make that clear upfront. We both love men too but Ann is my true soulmate.


just when i thought it wasn't possible to love you even more! *giggles* ask me about our Dancer Friend sometime... *blushes* heart
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sprite
Her Royal Spriteness
Quote by Dancing_Doll
I want my pussy to glow in the dark and taste like bubblegum.


Copy cat! biggrin
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sprite
Her Royal Spriteness
Quote by scooter
Quote by clum
Quote by scooter
You should of been a moderator Lisa.
With your knowledge, who knows?
I recomend what lisa said fella....


It's "should have"!

Sorry. That is a grammar 'pet hate' of mine.


It's alright Clum. I know that.
If you don't mind me stating things the way I choose,
I don't mind you correcting me


he should of said it nicer tho *gigglefit* heart
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sprite
Her Royal Spriteness
Quote by DirtyMartini
Here's a tip for getting more views...always make the characters in your story brother and sister, this way you can put it in the category...

Just saying...

Seriously though...I think categories have more to do with total views than the amount of time the story spends on the front page...

People will go and seek out popular stories in certain categories like reluctance, first-time, and of course ...

If you can keep a story out of the love story and straight sex categories, chances are you'll get more views...go for the more popular categories, if you can...

An example of how you might do that...a new member here asked me to read a story of hers recently, which I did...it was a story where a younger man loses his virginity to an older woman...she thought she might put it in the MILF category...

My suggestion to her was to put the story in the first time category, which tends to get more views, and add "MILF" in the tags...

Make sense? I thought so...


good points. whenever i think something could go in more than one catagory, i'll always put it in the one that traditionally attracts more readers.
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sprite
Her Royal Spriteness
Ok. A serious answer.
One. write. A lot. First stories I put up here didn't get all that many reads. The more i wrote, the more reads i got. Sheer volume made it so that i was a familiar name as a writer.

Two. Write well. Seems like a non brainer, but yeah, don't just put something up to put something up. Put the time and effort into making it the best you can. It doesn't matter if it's not Shakespeare or even close. make it the best YOU can.

Three. Be interesting. Make your stories stand out. don't write cliched, put some twists in or something to make it unique so that people take note.

Four. Get known. Really easy, actually, tho it takes a bit of time. Post in the forums a lot. be funny or smart of silly or eccentric or sexy, just sort of get your name out there.

Five. You want people to read your stuff? put some work into your bio page - fill out your entire biography and make it attractive, not just a list, but show off your skills. pick and avatar that reflects you, a back ground, some photos. Take advantage of a blog! show off your skills with little paragraphs of what is up in your life, or poetry, or little bits of fiction, just something to make people go hmm... interesting.

Six. Thank people for comments. I don't always find time to thank everyone who comments on my stories, but i do make an effort to send out notes from time to time saying 'thank you for taking time to read my stories'. It's always nice to be appreciated, and often, people will be more likely to read your stuff cause of that.

Seven. Be friendly. doesn't mean you have to cyber people, but take a moment to visit chat rooms and get to know folks. Put it out there that you're a writer. An occasional hour in a chat room will brush elbows with at least 25 people. do it enough, they remember you, check out your profile, etc.

Banners are a good idea for your signature. Some send alerts to their friend's list, but i'm not a big fan of that. Others put up alerts on their blogs or mention that they are working on stories and give out updates and hints.

Hope that helps. As for what day or at the beginning of the month or end... i don't think, in the long run, it matters. Sometimes it's just pure luck. Sometimes i write stories that i think are just going to amaze people and they get get ignored. Sometimes i write things that i think are ok, but not great and people dump praise all over me. i used to get kind of emo about readership, but after a while, i learned to relax. yeah, it's great to have tons of readers, but with as many stories as there are on lush, sometimes you just get lost in the crowd. if that happens, figure out how to stand out a little. smile
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sprite
Her Royal Spriteness
Quote by nicola
It hasn't happened.

We need to clone Gav to expedite all these features and requests.


Will his clone be single? is he interested in a 'live in arrangement' with two sexy girls? What about re-locating to Seattle?
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sprite
Her Royal Spriteness
Welcome to Lush, Olivia! Looking forward to reading your column. It's a great idea. Btw, what are your experiences with BDSM, cause I think there's a niche for a little open talk on the subject - a lot of people really have misconceptions about it being all about hurting and abusing and just using submissive girls for sex rather than the loving relationship it can be. anyways, good luck!

hugs,
rachel
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sprite
Her Royal Spriteness
I post nudes all the time. Usually, they are of DirtyMartini, WellMadeMale, and MagicalFelix, but i post them!
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sprite
Her Royal Spriteness
Make sure that there are condoms easily available! a nice assortment in like some colorful fiesta bowls in each room where the action might be taking place, for example. smile
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sprite
Her Royal Spriteness
Quote by Dancing_Doll
You are in the friend-zone. And the girl you are chasing is gay.

Any fondness or cute-flirty comments she makes to you are purely in jest and part of your friendship. Do not read into them or try to decode things that aren't there.

If a girl is into you, it will become very obvious.

Be a buddy to all of them (as you have been in the past) and move on to the next letter of the alphabet.



what Doll said. For the record, i've been Candi to my wife's Abbi. Be satisfied with what Abbi is willing to give you and don't push her for more. If that includes her inviting you over for the occasional 3some, go for it, but don't think it's cause she's in love with you - she's probably just looking for good times and she feels comfortable with you over a stranger. smile
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sprite
Her Royal Spriteness
Quote by Dancing_Doll
Quote by sprite
boobs vs ass... ok, i so have this picture of them in a cage match now... i'm putting my money on ass, no questions asked


This match-up definitely has potential for fight of the night honours. Boobs has good defence skills but my prediction is Ass for the win via rear naked choke.


Note: yes, that is an actual legitimate term.





you SO need to teach me this!
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sprite
Her Royal Spriteness
boobs vs ass... ok, i so have this picture of them in a cage match now... i'm putting my money on ass, no questions asked
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sprite
Her Royal Spriteness
Quote by Dancing_Doll
Sometimes he looks scared. But that's what the ball-gag and the industrial-sized bottle of lube is for.


and this is why i have chosen you as my role model biggrin
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sprite
Her Royal Spriteness
Quote by DirtyMartini
Quote by Her Royal Spriteness


speak for yourself! i am very fond of my hard earned badges smile


If you get any more badges, you'll need a bigger page...

And come on now..."hard earned?"...I mean really...those Yearling and Autobiographer badges must have really caused you to work up a sweat...

Just saying...


getting my yearling meant putting up with your for 365 days - hardest thing i've ever done! and hey, taking a look around and seeing how many people didn't bother to fill out their bio information OR put up an avatar? yeah, i am pretty proud of autobiographer too smile
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sprite
Her Royal Spriteness
Quote by Red_Dragon
BADGES WE DONT NEED NO STINKING BADGES


speak for yourself! i am very fond of my hard earned badges smile
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