There we were in a pub in Dunfermline snogging in this private booth at the back of the bar. We were both getting hot. I knew she was excited; I could feel her heat. Her cheeks were rosy red, her lips inflamed, and she was putty in my hands.

“Oh God," she said, “let’s go back to my place.”

I was thinking of a quicky here. “How far is it?" I asked.

“Just down the road, not far really.”

We left and got into the Ford Escort outside. My shipmate was on duty for the weekend, and we owned the car jointly. So thank fuck I had it for the weekend. She asked me what I did for a living, and I said I was a river pilot on the Humber River (actually, the ship was in dry dock in Rosyth).

A two-minute drive delivered us to her place. It was situated along the main road, one of those old, four-story Victorian buildings with a robust façade and bay windows.

“Where’s your husband?” I asked.

“Oh, he’s over on the continent driving one of those big trucks which he loves so much. He’s always away. He won’t be home till next week.”

“Great,” said I. We went into the house, where we fell upon each other, our hands and tongues exploring in ever-increasing excitement and longing.

“Wait, she said, let's have a shower first. I really want this to last all night.”

Oh, boy, I thought, it's jackpot time at last. In the shower, she was all over me, just like that bird out in Singapore, behind the Raffles Hotel.

“God," she says, "he's a big boy, isn’t he?” as she gently pulled the hood back to kiss the exposed head, before taking it fully into her mouth, and starting a rhythmic sucking with an occasional tongue licking around the end of my cock. Not wanting to shoot my load just yet, I stood her up and placed her back against the shower wall. I raised one of her legs and thrust into her with my full length as she shuddered in ecstasy.

After the fun in the shower, we dried each other and had a drink. We got excited again and then jumped on the bed. It was one of those water beds.

“New fashion," she said. “What do you think?” she asked.

I’ll tell you afterwards,” I replied.

I got on the bed, having put my clothes over the chair. She climbed up, threw her legs over me, and started kissing me again.

“How do you like to fuck?” she whispered in my ear.

“Honey,” I replied, “whatever way it pleases you.”

She was ready and wet instantly; how could I resist whatever came my way? Straddling me, she took my cock in her hand and guided it into her arse, gasping as she sank deeper upon it before starting to ride it with wild abandon. It was not too long before nature took its course, and I shot a full load into her.

Afterwards, we had a smoke and talked a little before we cuddled, then she asked, “How’s the big boy?”

“Ready and waiting” was my reply. She had a wicked grin as she guided John Thomas into his warm, natural home, but just as I started to pound her pussy once more, we heard the front door opening and shutting.

“WHAT WAS THAT?” she asked in a panic. I listened intently. “Shit! It’s my husband, he’s back,” she said, panicking.

It was 03:30. Normally, I never panicked, so I was thinking clearly. There’s only one way down, and that was the staircase. I’d meet him on the stairs.

“Quick," she retorted, “go out the window.” She grabbed my clothes and chucked them out into the wind, which blew most of them away. “Quick," she said, “he’s coming.”

I looked out and saw a drain pipe. I examined its fixings and thought it might be strong enough, so I climbed out and went down. At street level, I looked for my clothes, finding only my jacket and my shoes. I couldn’t find the rest, and thought, for fucks sake, I will need to get away like this!! Luckily, my keys and ID card were in my jacket pocket. I got in the car and out of the wind, starting the engine while I looked around.

“Fuck it!” I kept thinking as I drove off, wearing just my jacket and shoes. It was a funny feeling driving a car that way, I can tell you, so don’t fuckin laugh. My arse was sticking to the cold leather seat. I needed to head back to Rosyth dockyard in the dark and without being seen. Thank God the little heater is working, I thought, as the night now seemed to be getting significantly colder.

“Oh well,” I said to the big boy. ”Better luck next time.”

Just then, along the road, some blue flashing lights came up behind me. They followed for a few minutes, and when it was safe, they came alongside and ordered me to pull over in the next Lay-By.

A female copper came round and looked surprised at seeing me half naked in my car. She called her male colleague over. He asked me what I was doing, so I told them the truth. I said I was a sailor from Rosyth and showed my ID card and driving licence. It was one of those small red booklets in those days.

They radioed somewhere, and after a few minutes, the policewoman with a slight giggle said:

“You’d better try to cover yourself, otherwise it’s an indecent exposure charge, sir.”

They were both grinning at my expense. In the boot was an old ground sheet for when we went picnicking with some wrens. I gingerly got out in the cold, opened the boot, and grabbed the sheet, wrapping it around me.

Then they said, “Take care,” whilst laughing, and waving me off.

At the dockyard, the cops just waved me in as I flashed the ID card. I drove around to the dry dock and parked up quietly while observing the forward gangway.

Only the Bosun’s mate was on the gangway, grinning at me as I tiptoed over. The ship was virtually empty. The Quartermaster was away somewhere, inspecting something; I legged it back down to the mess, safe at last. Boy, was I glad to get back.

At least the run ashore wasn’t all bad, but it was a very close shave; that seems to be the story of my life.

Life in a blue suit can be a lot of fun.