The kids had been far too excited to hear we were going out and they were fending for themselves. It had been hard walking up to the local pub, we instinctively kept going to grab each other’s hands. We were sat in the beer garden, late spring sun on our backs by four, eagerly awaiting the very late lunch we had ordered. Liam did buy me lunch and I bought him a pint. I allowed him to mock me for ordering lime and soda and refusing to drink with him, but I am a bit of a lightweight and without food, this early, bad idea.

We sat opposite each other, our legs touching, keeping what little bit of contact we could. We talked, we laughed. Our friends started to turn up one at a time as they arrived home from work at varying times, but we stayed sat opposite each other innocuously touching legs, our simple reminder of what we shared going unnoticed by everyone else. The wine was indeed going to my head as the warm sun remained well past six, but it disguised the fact I think I was still giddy and flushed from all the fabulous orgasms I had been given that afternoon.

I didn’t see Pete arrive, he crept up behind me, put his arm around my shoulder and leant down to kiss me.

‘Hiya, gorgeous,’ he said.

I practically jumped out of my skin. I also felt a sudden rush of love for my husband fuelled completely by guilt I’m sure and turned the jump into a reason to stand up and hug him hello and kiss him again.

He smiled warmly at me, ‘Thank you for that welcome. How many wines have you had?’

‘A couple, they might have gone to my head a little,’ I giggled.

I left my hand wrapped around his waist and cuddled into him as he addressed and greeted the rest of our group. I glanced at Liam and caught his eye briefly, we were adept at communicating non-verbal signals to each other. I noted a shimmer of jealousy that he seemed to swallow and turned his attention away from me.

Pete and I went to the bar, so I could buy him a pint. There were a couple of other drinks in our round as well. The pub was busy and they were as understaffed as always so it took a while to get served. It gave us a chance to catch up on our day, to talk home and the kids before we went back to our friends. I think I handled it all fine, even managed to ride out the jokes about Liam sorting me out this afternoon. If only everyone knew just how well he’d sorted me out.

Caroline was last to arrive, she was obviously a bit miffed about this fact too. She brushed her lips against Liam’s cheek in greeting, asked for a large G&T and then swept around the group kissing everyone hello before taking a seat at the opposite end of the table. I thought I might feel guilty when I saw her, I don’t know why as I hadn’t about everything else Liam and I had done over the years. I didn’t now but I felt I should. I had spent the afternoon fucking her husband, but I didn’t. I suppose Caroline and I had the least in common out of our group of friends, just as Liam and I had very little in common on the surface. Not that that should be a reason for me to have lost sight of my moral compass which I knew I had. We clashed sometimes over political views, me being very left, her being a bit too right. She was a stricter parent than me and a bit too yummy mummy despite working long hours and having left most of the day-to-day parenting to Liam over the years, including when we’ve all been on holiday. Even though Liam works just as long hours. They are the most well off out of all of us and sometimes Caroline will let us know that. They live in the biggest house on the street, potentially the estate. I know she wishes her kids were in private school, but Liam wouldn’t allow it, an ongoing conflict we all try and keep out of. Pete and I have talked about how they only had three kids because that’s how many posh people have. She has many aspirations higher than her station. We sometimes feel she slums it a bit with us and maybe we are just convenient. All that said though, she can be very good company. I love her like a sister, she doesn’t deserve her husband cheating on her with someone she classes as one of her best friends.

Liam dutifully went to the bar to buy Caroline a drink, everyone else still had full glasses. I waited a few moments and then got up to go to the toilets. I did kind of need the loo, I went there first. If Liam was still at the bar, I’d steal my chance on the way back. I didn’t need to, Liam was waiting for me. The corridor to the toilets was private, separated from the bar by a door. We had shared a few illicit touches and kisses in this corridor. Our lips were clashing together before we spoke, his hand up under my floaty summer dress and sliding under the fabric of my knickers to squeeze my bum. I pulled back.

‘Liam, we’re not meant to be taking these risks anymore.’

‘I can’t help it, you are too sexy and the show you’re putting on with Pete, it turns me on. Making me feel jealous turns me on.’

He went to kiss me again.

I pulled back.

‘It’s not a show for you, he’s my husband. Did you not go to the bar?’

‘No, I hoped you’d follow me,’

‘We need to stop taking these risks…’ This time I kissed him. I was weak.

He led me out of the open fire door and around the back of the pub.

‘This queue at the bar is ridiculous,’ he said as he pushed me up against the wall and kissed me.

We made out like teenagers for a few minutes, it was only when we were alerted to voices in the toilet corridor we stopped. We knew one of the voices, it was one of our friends. Our eyes went wide, I couldn’t help it I had to stifle an involuntary giggle. My heart was pounding.

‘Shit, okay, maybe you are right, fewer risks,’ Liam whispered once it was all silent. We kissed again quickly and dashed through the corridor back to the bar. I went to the bar with him and asked him to get me a soda water to top my wine up with, making that the excuse as to where we’d been.

‘I’m going to be thinking of you and Pete later,’ Liam said quietly to me as we walked back through the bar.

‘Want me to message you after I’ve fucked him?’

His eyes lit up and he nodded.

I guess my orgasms for the day were far from over. It wasn’t until I sat down, I realised I hadn’t gone to the toilet. I smiled, glad we had an excuse for another accidental meeting of lips.

‘What has gotten into you tonight?’ my husband asked me laughing as I pulled him onto our bed. ‘Don’t get me wrong, I’m not complaining,’ he added.

‘I guess maybe just wine and spring sunshine and I love you,’ I pulled him into a kiss.

‘And I love you. You looked gorgeous tonight, I could have brought you home earlier. You have had a proper glow all evening.’

A pang of guilt ripped through me, knotted my stomach and shot bile up to my throat. Pete was kissing me eagerly before I had a chance to dwell any further on it.

I had worried I still smelt of sex with Liam, that Pete would smell Liam once he got close to me. I had checked, routinely all evening and Femfreshed the life out of my vagina to make sure. I didn’t smell of Liam, I was pretty sure I didn’t smell of Liam. Even so, when Pete pulled my knickers down and started kissing over my stomach, I panicked.

I moved from under him and instead took control, I took his cock into my mouth, he sat back onto the bed and let me suck him. I sucked him to the point that he pushed me away because he was about to come and then I straddled his lap, wrapped my legs around his back, let his cock slide easily inside my incredibly sensitive pussy. I pushed my hips into his until he filled me fully. We kissed, tenderly but eagerly, expectantly, wrapping our arms around each other. Pete reached a hand between our bodies and found my clit. It was so sensitive from this afternoon I gasped the moment he touched it. I wanted Pete to make me come, I needed his cock to be the last cock inside me again, I needed his fingers to be the last fingers to satisfy me again. I need to be his again. His Alice, not Liam’s Alice. Oh fuck, Liam, he’d made me feel so good this afternoon. My brain flooded with images. My brain whirled with confused feelings, my clit throbbed against Pete’s fingers. I panted and gasped as quietly as I could into Pete’s ear, so the kids didn’t hear us.

Pete nibbled and kissed my neck as his fingers brought me closer and closer to orgasm. I shut my eyes tight and let the sensations ripple out around my body until the final release, a final burst of pleasure. I started to lift my hips up and down before my orgasm fully subsided. I wanted to start fucking Pete whilst he could still feel my pussy twitching on his cock.

‘Fuck, Ali,’ he groaned softly into my ear.

We gripped each other tightly around our backs, our bodies rocked together. He brought his hips up to meet mine with perfect timing in a unison that only comes from having spent over twenty years fucking in this position. I think both our children were conceived in this position, this was me and Pete.

‘I love you,’ I panted into his ear before nibbling his ear lobe.

‘I love you,’ he gasped in reply.

I knew instantly when Pete was about to come, I could read his body so well, just as he read mine. Yet I was hiding so much from the man I had no secrets with. I gripped him tighter and rode him faster, Pete mimicking my movements once again with perfect timing.

‘Oh God yes, oh yes, ugh, ugh…’ Pete moaned as he pumped his load inside me.

We collapsed down onto the bed and pulled the covers up over us. We lay cuddled in each other’s arms, my leg draped over his thighs. We kissed softly. We talked briefly. Pete drifted off to sleep. I kissed him lightly on the lips and rolled away from him. Turning my back and reaching for my phone.

‘Are you awake?’ I text Liam.

‘Yes, been looking at shit online waiting for you to text me,’ came an instant reply.

‘You OK to chat?’

‘Yes, C’s asleep.’

‘So’s Pete. I sent him to sleep satisfied.’

‘You did? Are you satisfied?’

‘I don’t seem to ever feel satisfied at the minute.’

‘Did he come inside you?’

‘He did, I’m lying here with his come between my legs.’

‘I wish I was there to clean you up.’

‘I need cleaning up, my pussy is all hot and sticky again. It could do with some attention from your tongue.’

‘Put your fingers inside you and send me a picture.’

‘One sec…’

I reached my fingers between my legs, I inserted two inside me, I resisted a strong urge to push them on my clit whilst my hand was there. My clit may rub off if anyone goes near it again today. I took a photo, the flash lit up the room ridiculously brightly, too much when your husband is snuffling next to you. He didn’t stir. I sent the photo to Liam.

‘I want to lick those fingers,’ he replied.

‘I’m licking them now,’ I typed.

‘Fuck Alice you’re sexy. My cock is hard again, you drive me crazy.’

‘Wank your cock for me.’

‘I already am, it’s hard to wank discretely and type though.’

‘I wish we could sneak out.’

‘Where would we go?’

‘My office.’

‘I could sneak out.’

Fuck. My heart thumped hard in my chest, so hard I could hear it in my ears, so hard I thought the noise might wake Pete.

‘Do you want me to sneak out?’ Liam text again at my lack of reply.

‘Yes,’ I sent.

Fuck, I did want this but fuck.

‘You be in there waiting for me sitting on your desk with your legs open so I can dive straight between your legs. I want to taste Pete’s come on your pussy.’

I replied with a thumbs up and a load of kisses. This was dangerous. This was exactly the risk we shouldn’t be taking. So much for Pete’s cock being the last cock inside me. Where the hell had this insatiable sex drive come from?

Luckily, I knew my husband, a few beers and an orgasm, he wasn’t stirring till the following morning. I kissed him gently on the forehead. I wrapped myself in my dressing gown and crept out of the bedroom. I crept downstairs without putting a light on until I was in the kitchen. Derby met me, I panicked. I hadn’t factored Derby into this, he was going to bark like crazy when he heard Liam. Shit, what can I do with Derby? I had no choice but to take him with me into the office along with a chew treat that should keep him occupied. I was once again grateful dogs couldn’t talk.

‘You know too many of my secrets, Derby,’ I whispered, ruffling the curls on his head.

We walked across the garden to the converted double garage that was my office stroke workshop, Derby jumping at my side to try and get the chew treat I was waving to keep his attention. I opened up and turned on the electric heater, the night had not held the warmth of the day and it was distinctly chilly. I threw Derby’s chew into the farthest corner of my office in the hopes he wouldn’t even notice Liam enter.

Of course, he did and of course, he barked but Liam went straight to him and fussed him and he settled down again instantly, disappearing back to his chew before Liam had locked the door behind him.

‘I didn’t think about Derby.’

‘Nor did I, Bailey lifted his head but it’s like he knew it wasn’t walk time, he wasn’t interested.’

We were whispering.

‘This is so bad,’ I said.

‘But so good,’ Liam replied.

‘The dog spoiled the plan of me being sat on my desk, sorry,’ I said.

‘I don’t care.’

Liam kicked off his shoes and was pulling off his t-shirt and joggers as he crossed the room towards where I was stood. I couldn’t believe how much I still wanted him.

I let my dressing gown fall to the floor and kicked off my flip flops as I walked towards him. We were both naked when we met. We fell into a kiss instantly, hands everywhere, his quickly found their way between my legs and he moaned with satisfaction at finding me so wet and sticky with Pete’s come.

He edged me towards my desk, I put my hands out behind me and then sat back onto the edge of the desk once I reached it. Liam dropped immediately to his knees and sank his face between my legs.

‘What the hell would Pete think if he knew you were eating his come from my pussy,’ I whispered.

‘It might make his cock as hard as mine is,’ Liam said hurriedly before resuming his tongue's attention.

‘Fuck,’ I exhaled long. ‘Oh fuck.’

Liam did not have to work hard to make me come, the illicitness of being here in the office with him, with our families asleep in our houses. The danger. I was so turned on.

I expected him to push his cock instantly inside me but he didn’t. He stood up and looked at me, a long look full of hunger, of desire, of, fuck, I knew that look.

‘Don’t say it,’ I said.

‘Why?’ he asked coming closer to me and kissing me.

‘Don’t make this more complicated. Please.’

‘OK, Alice, but you know it’s how I feel, I want to tell you how I feel,’ he was kissing my shoulder blades.

‘Fuck, Liam, we can’t, we can’t…’

‘Have fallen in love?’

‘I said don’t say it.’

I grabbed his cock and pulled it, so it rested against my pussy, Liam edged closer and he pushed inside me.

‘Do you only want me for my cock?’

‘Yes,’ I gasped as he thrust hard inside me.

‘You’re a good liar,’ he replied.

I gripped his arse with my hands and wrapped my legs around his thighs and pulled him closer into me as he started to pump inside me. He held his hands firm around my back and we kissed. Sometimes we kissed hard, then we would pause, then we’d kiss soft and gentle. Sometimes we would just gasp breathlessly into each other’s mouths before kissing each other again. Liam felt so good inside me. He went to bury his face in my neck. I stopped him.

‘I want to look at you,’ I whispered.

He smiled, he gasped, he held my gaze then he closed his eyes. I didn’t mind that, I just wanted to watch him come, I wanted to see that smile erupt. I knew he’d open them again at the critical moment.

There was a rattle at the door. We stopped dead. Liam’s eyes shot open. This was not the critical moment I had been thinking of and there was no smile, just a look of horror.

‘Shit,’ we both said.

It rattled again.

‘Alice, open the fucking door,’

‘Fuck!’ Liam flew off me, I flew off the desk. He looked around desperately.

‘There’s nowhere to hide,’ I managed to whisper even in panic.

‘Fuck!’ he whispered.

We looked at each other, petrified. He took my hand and squeezed it.

‘Fuck!’ we both whispered again.

‘Liam, maybe you can open the door instead?’

Our eyes both shot wide. Liam dropped his head. I felt sick. Properly stomach-wrenching sick. I thought my heart was going to explode out of my chest or my ears. Maybe I was going to die of a stroke or a heart attack right now, so I didn’t have to deal with this.

We looked at each other. We were frozen. Stood staring at the door, holding hands, tightly.

‘Please don’t make me shout and bang this door but I will if you don’t fucking open it, I will.’

We looked at each other, tears welled up in my eyes.

‘How?’ Liam said.

‘I don’t know,’ I replied.

‘Okay, Pete, one second,’ I said slightly louder than my normal voice but trying not to shout.

‘No seconds, I don’t care if his cock’s inside you, open the fucking door.’

Derby, oblivious, was crying at the door, wagging his tail wanting to see his dad.

I walked to the door.

Liam frantically tried to pull his clothes on.

I didn’t bother getting dressed. The game was up. I didn’t know how but it was. There was nothing either of us could say to make this OK.

I opened the door to my husband and tears fell uncontrollably down my face.

He looked hurt, he looked angry. He was fucking angry.

Pete flew at Liam who had only just managed to pull his joggers over his rapidly reducing but not quick enough erection. Then he stopped dead. Just as Liam braced himself for the punch or the tackle to the floor that he was expecting.

‘I don’t want to fight you. You know I’m not that person,’ Pete said sadly and turned away. He turned back around a moment later to face us.

‘Is either of you going to speak? You didn’t think I had a clue, did you?’

We both shook our heads.

‘Pete, I’m sorry, I am so…’ Liam spoke first. I was struck dumb.

‘I don’t want to hear apologies. I don’t know what I want actually. I thought I’d feel better confronting you. I was driving myself mad up there imaging you fucking each other. I had to, but now I have…’

Pete sat back on the large trestle table where I did my designs. He sat on a design I had been working on all week, that was the least of my problems now. He looked down at the floor and ran his fingers through his hair, pulling slightly at the sides.

‘How long have you known?’ Liam asked.

I couldn’t speak. Tears rolled and rolled down my face, my heart was shattering into a thousand pieces as I stood there. I had been so foolish, so selfish, so stupid.

‘I knew something was going on but tonight, I smelled it. You smelt of sex, Ali, and not how you and me smell. How stupid do you both think I am? I’m not fucking stupid. Caroline is, she’s too far up her own arse to notice her husband’s fucking my wife. I noticed. I’ve watched you both sneaking off when we’re out. I followed you one night. I saw you. Do you know how much it hurts to watch your wife and your best friend getting off with each other? To see those secret looks you give each other. I see how much you glow, Ali, when you’ve been together, you used to look like that with me, but not recently-’

‘Pete I still…’

‘You don’t, Ali. You radiate when Liam messages you. You talk about each other all the fucking time…’

A loud sob escaped me. I didn’t want to be crying right now but I couldn’t help it.

‘You know what, Liam, fuck my wife, let me watch. Go on, your cock’s barely soft, finish what you started…’ Pete started to raise his voice then brought it back down.

He wouldn’t want to wake the kids or the neighbours. Our world was crashing down around our ears and he was still my sensible, caring Pete, doing the right thing. Unlike me.

‘It turns you on doesn’t it?’ he was saying angrily to Liam, ‘Sneaking over here after she’s fucked me when my come’s still fresh inside her. That make your cock hard?’

Liam actually blushed.

‘Go on then,’ Pete directed, ‘maybe I’ll like it, you fuck her, then I’ll fuck her. Let’s have it all out in the open…’

‘I’m not going to fuck Alice,’ Liam said sharply.

‘Why not? You were fucking her when I tried opening the door, weren’t you? Your cock was still hard when I walked through the door.’

‘No, Pete. I know. We’ve been caught, in the middle of the act, red-handed. I don’t know what to say. There is nothing to say. We’ve been fooling around for years, we tried to stop it, we didn’t try soon enough. Believe it or not Pete today is the first time we’ve had sex. Honestly, the first time. We tried walking away from each other because neither of us wanted to do this, but we did want to do this, too much. I have fallen in love with your wife, Pete, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to. I don’t think she loves me, she loves you. She fancies me, I don’t think she feels as much for me as I do her. Right now, her heart is breaking for you, mine is breaking for her. I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry. I’m sorry we got caught, I’m sorry we crossed this line, I’m sorry I’ve hurt you, you are my best friend and I’m a shit friend. I’m so fucking sorry.’

Pete turned to look at me, ‘Do you love him?’ he asked.

I sniffed, I looked at both of them, ‘I’m in love with you both,’ I blubbed. ‘I haven’t done any of this because I’ve stopped loving you, Pete, I haven’t. I love you so much. You don’t deserve this, I didn’t want to hurt you, I didn’t ever want you to find out because I didn’t want to lose you, but I had no self-control, I fell slowly for Liam. He’s telling the truth, today is the first time we’ve fucked. Things have happened so slowly, but we did fall in love and I have no excuses.’

‘I don’t want to hear excuses Ali, I want to hear what you’ve told me. If I didn’t love you so much, Ali, if I couldn’t read you inside and out, if I was as self-absorbed as you pair and all of our friends are, you’d have continued getting away with it. It’s easy isn’t it, a convenient little arrangement.’

‘That isn’t how it happened, it-’

‘I don’t want to hear it, Liam. Save your side for Caroline, I only want to talk to my wife. I think it’s time you fuck off back to your own house, your own bed, go lie in the bed you’ve made. Let me and Ali sort out the bed she’s made.’

‘Alice?’ Liam looked at me.

I nodded and hoped the silent message of ‘sorry and I do love you, I honestly do,’ was conveyed by my eyes because I couldn’t say it. This morning I had everything, today, now, I am facing ending up with nothing.

‘I have to ask, Pete, have you told Caroline? What am I walking home to?’

Pete laughed and shook his head, ‘I haven’t told her anything. That’s up to the two of you. I’m sorry your marriage is so shit she hasn’t noticed.’

Liam didn’t look relieved, ‘Thank you for not hurting my family. It’s more than I deserve. I am sorry, Pete, I truly am.’

‘I know you’re sorry you got caught, Liam, and before you’d got to come too. I’m glad I timed it right.’

‘Okay, I guess I should go, Alice, you okay?’

‘I’m not okay, Liam, but you need to go home. I’ll call you. We’ll talk, again.’ I glanced at Pete as I said the words, he was looking at the floor. I tried again to convey how I felt with a solitary look. I could tell Liam was trying to do the same. He grabbed his t-shirt and shoes and walked out of my office.

I knew that wasn’t our goodbye, but we’d have to have a goodbye and that hurt. It hurt so much.

‘I’ve made such a fucking mess, Pete, I am so desperately sorry. I can’t begin to try and explain why I don’t know why I barely know how it happened. He’s right, I feel heartbroken. I am so sorry I’ve hurt you. I didn’t want to hurt you. I honestly, and Zak and Lilly please let’s try and put them first. I know I haven’t, I’ve put me first but please, don’t make me hurt my kids.’ Tears overflowed from my eyes again and the last few words could just be made out through my sobs.

I realised I was still standing naked in my office. I suddenly felt very cold. Potentially it was the shock hitting me more than the temperature.

Pete had just stared at me as I spoke an unreadable look on his face. He sighed. He picked up my dressing gown off the floor.

‘Come here,’ he said.

I walked tentatively toward him. As I reached him, he held out my dressing gown, I turned and fed my arms through the sleeves. He hung it on my shoulders and I pulled it tight around me.

His arms slid around my waist and he pulled me into his body. He lightly kissed the top of my head and he hugged me. I felt momentary relief from my self-inflicted pain.

‘I love you so much, I want to forgive you, but I don’t know how to start to. I don’t know how we can ever be the same now and I don’t know how we can be different.’

‘Do we talk? Do you need space? What can I do, Pete, I’ll do anything?’

‘Let’s go inside, I need a drink. I thought I was going to want to shout and scream at you both, but I don’t. I feel numb. Let’s go and talk, work out what we do, what’s best for the four of us, right now. We need to work out how the morning works, we need to know how we make some normal for our kids while we are the opposite of normal. Why did you do this to us, Ali, why? I thought we were solid?’

I watched my husband choke back tears because he was being strong, he was holding this together.

‘I don’t deserve you,’ I said.

He nodded.