I am a semi-retired industrial scientist with tertiary-level teaching experience. My wife died a few years back. With time on my hands, I do some consultancy, take part in hobby activities, and socialise.
In late August two years ago, I was in our pub on a Monday evening. The new barmaid called Carolyn, whom I knew lived locally. Her mother was a senior nurse at the local hospital. Her husband had died in a traffic accident about three years ago. They were a West Indian family. Carolyn told me her A-level results were not up to expectations.
I asked her what ‘A’ levels she had taken, and she replied physics, chemistry and maths. The chemistry grade was OK, but physics and maths needed to improve to get her place at uni.
This was something I knew and understood because I had been in a similar situation fifty years before. The technical college nearby could assist Carolyn in getting better grades, but she was not aware of the possibilities offered by the college. The bar got busier, and Carolyn asked if I could come round one evening soon and talk to her mum about it. I was happy to do that, and we agreed on a time and date.
I called around as agreed a few days later, and her mother was home.
Her mother who is called Norma said, “Thank you so much for coming round this evening. Carolyn told me about your conversation. It’s an excellent idea for her to start at the technical college. Their admissions day is in about three days, so we have caught the opportunity for Carolyn to apply. Should Carolyn go alone, or should I go with her?”
At nineteen, I thought Carolyn could manage her affairs and tried to find a diplomatic way to put across that idea. Norma agreed with me. Carolyn should go alone with her reasons to improve her results.
Carolyn said, “What do you think I should say to them?” In explanation, I said that she could go prepared to talk about her preferred choice of study at university. She replied, “I’m interested in physics, but I could study something with it.”
I said, “There is always computer science, electronics, astrophysics and more. These subjects could help you find a job in the future or carry on if you went into research. The college will expect you to have a general idea of what you like to do and to have choices in mind. That’s normal.”
Carolyn’s mother, Norma, asked, “How is it for women in the world of science these days?”
“Things have changed for the better,” I said. “Women can expect a career equal to that of a man these days. Several British universities have women who hold very senior positions.”
Norma made me a cup of coffee, and we talked about generalities. Carolyn went to her room and left me alone with her mother. Her mother said Carolyn’s major problem has been the loss of her father. She was very close to her father, and it devastated her when he died. Would I be prepared to help Carolyn with her studies, please?
So I told her mother, “If it’s mathematics or physics, there’s no problem. Modern examination syllabus requirements are available on the internet. At work, we use advanced mathematics, and I use it in my hobbies. You need to discuss the matter with Carolyn, but I am ready to help and I will do it free.”
Norma said, “That’s very kind of you”.
Recalling the past, I said, “I had one or two lucky breaks when I was her age. Perhaps Carolyn is a bird shot in one wing. She must not get shot in the other. We must patch her up and teach her to fly again. Let’s not burden her with too much upfront.”
Norma then said quietly, “Can we meet up somewhere soon, please, without Carolyn? I would like to have a private talk with you. We can’t do it now. Carolyn will wonder why you haven’t gone home. I have next Tuesday afternoon free. I could come to your house where Carolyn won’t know about our chat. Is it possible, please?”
“Of course,” I replied, “How about two p.m.? We could exchange mobile numbers. If anything changes, we can stay in touch about it.”
“Yes, please,” replied Norma. So we exchanged mobile numbers. “Let’s hope we can make it at two p.m. next Tuesday.”
I took this as a good point at which to say ‘goodbye’ and depart.
Norma was a good-looking lady, and in her mid 40s. Her visit, I now realise, marked a turning point in my life. On Tuesday, Norma arrived at my house at two p.m. as agreed. I had put the kettle on and offered tea or coffee and biscuits. Norma requested a cup of tea. After a few pleasantries, she addressed matters.
The college had accepted Carolyn to take a year’s further study of maths and physics. The aim was for her to re-sit ‘A’ levels the next year. She had only been there a few days, but she had settled already.
Norma said, “The problem is Carolyn’s sense of loss at the death of her father. She hasn’t got over it yet. Carolyn had a great relationship with him, possibly better than she does with me. I don’t think anything sexual went on between Carolyn and her father, because I know for certain she is still a virgin.”
“But I know things went on quietly between them. Her father was a bit of a disciplinarian after his time in the armed forces, and I suspect it had something to do with that. I’m just letting you know in advance.”
“Whatever went on, after his death, Carolyn went to pieces, and it affected her school work. She hasn’t behaved badly, but she is not herself at all, and time is not acting as the great healer. She admires you and perhaps sees you as a surrogate father. It was her suggestion to ask you to come round; I did not know you could assist, and I’m very grateful.”
“Carolyn is shy to ask you for help, but I know she would welcome it. She doesn’t want me to be the go-between. I’m wondering if you could catch her at the pub? Do you think you could drop by there and see if she wants to talk again, please?”
This was fine by me, so I said, “On Friday I will be down at the pub and try to catch her eye. In the meantime, I will buy booklets of the past papers in mathematics and physics. The college will make extra efforts if they know she is working on past exam questions. I speak from experience. She needs to get on top of the hard stuff and get used to dealing with it if she wants to handle uni.”
Norma stared at me and said, “Do you think Carolyn is capable of this?”
Parents sometimes underestimate their children, so I replied, ”Yes, why not? We need to give it our best shot. Your daughter is worth it. She had a huge relationship with her father, and his loss was devastating for her. Perhaps I need to help her get over that as well.”
There was a long silence, and Norma replied, “If you could replace some of what Carolyn is missing, I think it would be a wonderful thing for her. Mr Jordan, I’m so grateful, and I hope it goes well on Monday night.”
Smiling, I replied, “I’m Arthur, if you would like to call me that. I will give it my best effort. I hope when Carolyn realises I’m serious about helping her, she will cheer up. Let’s see what happens after that.”
Norma said, “Your subtle but direct approach may be just right. In some of your mannerisms and ideas, you remind me of my late husband. There is a remarkable similarity.” She said a little cheekily, “No one is perfect. You can’t help being white.”
“That’s naughty, Norma,” I said. “Don’t worry; I have a sense of humour.” Chancing my arm just a little, I replied, “All cats are grey in the dark.”
Norma looked at me reprovingly and said. “That’s very naughty,” but she had the good grace to laugh.
I had to ask, and said, “Norma, please can you tell me more about your late husband if it’s not too painful?”
“Yes,” she replied. “He followed his father into the RAF at 18 and he was 20 years older than me when we married. That’s not so unusual in our community. The RAF helped him to find a good job with a local electronics company. They soon found out that he was very good at dealing with electronics problems.”
“Jim built a shed you can see in our back garden, and he used that as his workshop. The company let him bring things home, and he worked on them in the shed. Sometimes he needed another pair of hands to help him do things. If she was home, he would call on Carolyn to help him. She loved working with him. Now he is gone, she won’t go in there. We don’t use it for anything now, and I’m afraid that Carolyn thinks of it as a shrine to her father.”
“I wish I could help Carolyn get over her loss, and I think you may be the best person to do it. You brought up two lovely children and they are doing well in life. I know I can trust Carolyn with you. She is an adult and must make her own decisions these days.”
“Norma,” I said. ”I will look for Carolyn at the pub next Friday.”
The next day, I went to town and bought the booklets containing past examination papers. On Friday evening, I went to the pub and there was Carolyn behind the bar. It was early evening and not busy. Carolyn smiled when she saw me and said, “I believe you have had a word with my mother?”
“Yes,” I replied. “Your mother told me you have started at the technical college on a year’s maths and physics courses.”
Carolyn said, “They teach mathematics so much better than they did at school.”
“If you need any help, please contact me,” I replied. “I’m up to speed on maths and physics ‘A’-level course content. I’ve bought the five years past examination papers for A and S levels in maths and physics for the examination board favoured by the college. Perhaps we should meet up and talk about how it’s going. Would you like to come round one evening, and we can have a chat about things?”
Carolyn replied, “Yes please, how about next Tuesday evening? I work here on Monday and Friday nights, but I’m free on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday.”
“Great,” I said. ”What time would suit you?”
“Seven p.m., please, I have had supper by then,” she replied.
“Good,” I replied, “I will see you at seven p.m. next Tuesday at my house. You know where it is, don’t you?”
“Yes,” she replied. “I’m looking forward to it.”
By the following Tuesday, Carolyn would have been at the technical college for about two weeks. It was time to check up on how she was getting on. Carolyn arrived on time. I had put the kettle on and she accepted a cup of coffee.
We sat at the table in case she wanted to show me any work. She had brought some notebooks with her.
I started by asking what she thought about teaching in both maths and physics. She said that the teaching was of a higher standard than she had known at school, and particularly so in maths teaching. The physics laboratory was much better fitted out than the one at school. I asked her what she was doing about note-taking and recording details discussed in their lessons.
She showed me her notebooks, but they were a little scrappy and needed writing up with more care and accuracy. She took the point immediately and asked me how I thought she should go about it. Carolyn accepted my advice, saying, “Why didn’t I think of that?”
I gave her the four past examination question booklets with about fifty questions per booklet. My old reinforced fibreglass document bag was in the hall, and, having no more use for it, I gave it to her. She was a bit moved by all this, and her voice shook a little as she talked to me.
Carolyn said, “When I see you in the pub and hear you talking to your friends, you sound just like my father. Tonight, you are even more like him. You have that you have experience and authority in your voice, and in my case, with kindness added to it.”
This was a surprise, and I replied, “It’s very kind of you to say that. I realise what a terrible loss it was to you when your father died and no one can replace him. I think we have done enough for one night. Why don’t we leave it for a week? Next Tuesday you can show me how you have got on with writing up your course notes. The following week, we can start going through the past examination questions. There’s about two hundred to work on, with the S-level questions as well.”
Carolyn opened her mouth in surprise. Carrying on, I said, “In the next thirty weeks, it means you need to work on about seven a week. That gives you plenty to think about.”
Carolyn put her head a little on one side and said, “Thank you so much. It’s so like listening to my father. Thank goodness you have come along in time to help me. I stand a chance now.”
The next Tuesday soon came around, and Carolyn knocked on the door carrying the bag I had given her. We sat down and she got out two binders labelled ‘Maths’ and ‘Physics’. These were her neatly written course notes. This was just what I wanted to see. Carolyn had not only listened, she had acted on what I had advised her to do.
To my surprise, after we had gone through the course notes, Carolyn got out another binder marked Old Exam Questions- Physics. Inside were her attempts at ten answers to questions from past physics exam papers. She had brought the relevant booklet with her. We went through these. Seven of them were spot-on. Two had errors, and in one, she had become confused. I went through these three with her and an hour and a half had flown. Seven out of ten was excellent for a start, and I told her so.
Carolyn was tired after this. We exchanged ‘good nights,’ and she went home.
The next Tuesday soon came around. We went through her notes for the week, and this time it was her attempts at ten answers to questions from past maths paper exam questions. This was impressive; I wasn’t expecting so much effort so soon. Her maths wasn’t so good. Six of her answers were fine, two were out of line, and two were way beyond her. Never mind, it told me where to concentrate my efforts regarding her maths. I heaped praise on Carolyn for her efforts, and for not being dismayed when she had come up against problems.
Then she said, “Tomorrow, which is Wednesday, my last lesson finishes at three p.m. Can I come round after it and arrive at about three-thirty, please? If the weather is nice, we could hire a boat and go for a little row. I used to do that with my father, and I haven’t done it since he died. I would so much like that! The weather forecast is good.”
I had to agree. Why not? It sounded very innocent, so I said, “Yes, it’s been ages since I have done that. We can go to the boatyard in my car.”
Carolyn beamed and said, “I hope the forecast is right! See you tomorrow.”
The next day dawned bright and dry with an early mist which soon lifted. Carolyn arrived on time and we went to the boatyard. The water level was high, and Carolyn said, “Today there’s enough water to take out their sailing boat. Why don’t we do that?”
I was quite happy with it, so we hired a small sailing boat. Carolyn knew how to sail it well and we went quite a long way up the river against the wind and tide. We must have sailed for nearly an hour before we turned around.
On the way back, Carolyn gave me a shock. She said, “At least today I can sit comfortably on this wooden thwart.”
So I said, “You imply that sometimes you couldn’t sit comfortably?
Carolyn said, “That’s right, and it is because my father would bring me down here to sail or row immediately after he had caned my bottom for being a naughty girl. He thought it was good if I had to sit in the boat on the hard seat with a sore bottom. It was all part of making me behave better.”
I had got such a shock and said, “Carolyn, did your father often give you a caning?”
She said, “Not so much during term time because I couldn’t go to school with marks on my bottom. The marks often lasted a week to ten days after one of his canings.”
“But how could you put up with that?” I said.
Incredibly, Carolyn replied, “Actually, I rather liked it. Father only did it because I was naughty and he didn’t cane me until I was sixteen. It wasn’t very hard, and it gave me a moderate sting. It left marks on my bum that started as grey lines but turned red. I knew I deserved it for being a...
